Asetru 32 points 4 days ago

Why would this apply only to girls?

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did_you_find_violets 38 points 4 days ago

cause traditionally/stereotypically feminine things are seen as stupid, useless, and cringe while masculine ones are seen as serious, deep, and respectable.

trans people also show that being a man is seen as an "upgrade" while being a woman a "downgrade" (trans men don't get a fraction of the hate trans women do). same thing with tomboys-femboys.

plus, a man and woman could do the exact same thing (being assertive for example) & the perception will be different (woman - bitch, man - boss).

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Asetru 18 points 4 days ago

If you think boys aren't ridiculed (for literally anything) you've never been to school.

So, boys, might as well do what you want.

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velma 1 point 3 days ago

Boys already do what they want hahaha

The phrase “boys will be boys” is a thing that exists ffs

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did_you_find_violets -4 points 4 days ago

the experiences of boys and girls in society aren't comparable.
this post is about girls, going "but what about the boys?" on it is just misogyny.

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Peanutbjelly 11 points 4 days ago

so why exclude men who are made fun of for feminine expression?

there are definitely socialized negative biases that specifically women deal with, but being exclusionary doesn't actually help the cause, it just narrows the audience that is allowed to relate to the cause.

and it applies in gender neutral situations, like drawing literally anything in jr.high/highschool would grant the name ____fucker, no matter the benign nature of the variable being drawn.

it's a good little rule that doesn't need to devolve into a cultural battle about which group gets to identify with it more.

i constantly talk about the atheist/mra vs feminist war which just put everyone on the defensive, destroying active efforts in fighting groups like the heritage foundation, who are now doing unimaginable systemic harm to women through destruction of academic spaces and scientific efforts around women's health largely propped up by religious fundamentalist efforts.

sometimes you have to be like "there's something specific about this group which we don't want being lost in the current conversation," but also sometimes it's good to be less rigid about which generalized group is allowed to identify with or benefit from progressive ideals.

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Signtist 18 points 4 days ago

Making a post about women doesn't - and shouldn't - mean you're excluding men. I feel like excluding should only be defined as an active attempt to prevent people from associating with the post, rather then a failure to include men and enbies and every other gender in existence in the body of the post.

I feel like leftist spaces have gotten a bit too expectant that everything relevant to an individual must be explicitly stated to be as such, rather than encouraging people to simply find relevancy even in things that are not explicitly made for them. I'm a guy, and when I read this I felt a connection with it - I didn't even think about how it only mentioned women, as if that should mean it can't apply to me.

I would rather instill a mindset in all people that would allow for situations where, for example, a man can find relevancy in a post about women, rather then try to get all people to only share content that specifically addresses who all is intended to be able to relate to it. A woman saying things are hard for women isn't making any comments about whether or not it's hard for men, just like a black guy saying black lives matter isn't making any comments about whether or not all lives matter.

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did_you_find_violets 16 points 4 days ago

fem guys already relate to content targeted toward women since their lived experience is closer to that than to the typical man, so no exclusion.

men often do this. post is about something women related -> "but what about the men?". we don't have a duty or obligation to include men in every single conversation. men can also create their own content/conversations, and they should. hijacking/inserting themselves just reeks of insecurity and misogyny.

edit and just to be clear: anyone who finds this post relatable is more than valid and welcome, regardless of gender. it’s just the act of explicitly turning it into a “won’t somebody please think of the men?” thing that really grinds my gears.

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