fizzle 51 points 7 days ago

I'm curious to know what they think parents should do next.

I'm certain it does not involve challenging your own preconceptions.

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Arcanepotato 44 points 7 days ago

I'd bet 'grandparents rights' are part of it.

Edit: I have made a fool of myself. It's actually surprisingly reasonable.

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fizzle 8 points 7 days ago

ooh. Yeah ok of course. Is that a real thing ?

edit:

ok it is a real thing. I'm a parent. I'd never wondered about this because my relationship with my parents is ok. I mean they're nutty conservatives but they're smart enough not to say anything about it.

Setting aside cases of abuse and neglect. It's kind of weird to think that someone other than myself and my partner can have a say in who my child has to spend time with.

I think it would be an up-hill battle for my parents in my jurisdiction for example. I think they would need to establish that it's in the child's best interest to have a meaningful relationship with them, and they might struggle to do that.

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BenVimes 10 points 7 days ago

Grandparents' rights are not what many people seem think they are. It's not a court ordering a couple to let estranged/toxic grandparents have access to their grandkids above the objections of the parents.

Rather, it is adjusting custody arrangements during separation/divorce so that grandparents can maintain an existing relationship wth their grandkids. For example, if a couple is separating and the mother gains primary custody, the father's parents can apply to get visitation rights with the kids. It's not automatic, as they would have to meet the burden of, "in the best interest of the children," to the satisfaction of the judge.

Disclaimer: I am not a lawyer, but this is my understanding of the issue from reading discussions and papers (including the one linked in another post in this thread).

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fizzle 5 points 7 days ago

In my jurisdiction I think that's only partially true.

Firstly, it's also true here that the outcome needs to be "in the best interest of the child", and that's critical.

However, it's not only cases where the child's parents have had a relationship breakdown, but is applicable to cases where the child's parents are estranged from the grandparents:

Sometimes grandparents are prevented from having a relationship with their grandchildren. This can happen where the relationship with their own child has broken down (but the parents’ relationship remains intact), or where the parents have separated and one parent refuses to let them see their grandchildren. Grandparents do not have an automatic right to have a relationship with a grandchild. However, grandparents, and anyone who has an ongoing relationship with the child, or any other person who can show that they are concerned with the care, welfare or development of a child (including grandparents) can apply to the court for parenting orders.

https://www.legalaid.wa.gov.au/...

So it's not a law that would regularly enable grandparents to corrupt children against the wishes of the child's parents.

Additionally, I suspect that parenting orders may be able to require supervised access, or restrict them from participating in religious ceremonies and that kind of thing.

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BenVimes 4 points 7 days ago

Right, I'm mostly familiar with Canada (my own country) and the USA (by cultural osmosis).

Still, the legal burden on the grandparents to get access to their grandkids seems sufficiently high. It's far cry from the idea many people seem to have of grandparents' rights, i.e. the right of the grandparenta to see their grandkids supercedes that of the parents to control whom the kids interact with.

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