‘Pure greed:’ Etiquette expert explains why tipping has gotten out of control

Perhaps you’ve noticed. We have reached a tipping point in the country over tipping.

To tip or not to tip has led to Shakespearean soliloquies by customers explaining why they refuse to tip for certain things.

During the height of the COVID-19 pandemic, customers were grateful for those who seemingly risked their safety so we could get groceries, order dinner or anything that made our lives feel normal. A nice tip was the least we could do to show gratitude.

But now that we are out about and back to normal, the custom of tipping for just about everything has somehow remained; and customers are upset.

A new study from Pew Research shows most American adults say tipping is expected in more places than it was five years ago, and there’s no real consensus about how tipping should work.

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Eezyville 213 points 3 years ago

Tipping needs to end. It's the employer's responsibility to make sure their employees are paid reasonably. Instead they pass that responsibility to the customer, ensuring tension between customers and staff.

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rosymind 34 points 3 years ago

I used to be a consistent tipper.

Now I refused to tip at all.

I want workers to demand what they are worth to their employers, and I'm willing to be the asshole to help them accomplish that.

If we all stopped tipping, they'd have no choice but to turn the low wage issue around onto their employers. Then employers will have no choice but the pay their workers more, because otherwise they'd leave their industry for something else.

I don't care if that means we, as consumers, have to pay a bit more for the food and service. I don't care if that means that some businesses won't survive. I want fairness all around

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theneverfox 2 points 3 years ago

I refuse to tip anywhere new and expand this practice... But with things like restaurants or delivery? Without organization, all that does is further underpay people for their work and increase the chances of spitting in your food

I don't think there's a good answer, so I just do it much less

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hydrospanner 2 points 3 years ago

As far as delivery, if I'm charged a delivery fee "because reasons", that's the extra money that is my tip. If they're asking for a tip as well, then no.

But instead of just not tipping, I just don't get delivery, which I haven't since the pandemic. Two or three experiences where I was trying to order and all the add on fees plus tips meant that dinner for one was going to cost over $45 and dinner for two, over $60 (when the entrees themselves were like $12-15) and basically that was enough to convince me not to do it.

At one place there was a delivery fee, a delivery service fee, a "take out packaging" fee, a service fee, a charge for ordering less than $25, a driver fee (which they were quick to tell me was not a tip)...and of course still asked for a tip, with the options being 20, 22, and 25%. Even choosing the lowest tip, my single meal was going to cost $46 for food that I could walk in, sit down, order, eat, tip, and leave...all for under $25.

Basically I just don't get delivery now, and while I know that won't break the system, maybe if enough people join me it will.

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rosymind 1 point 3 years ago

I used to think that way as well. But really, if spit in my food is being used as a threat to tip someone isn't that extortion?

I'm polite, easy to serve, and even if the food is over-cooked and way too salty (as it was for the single taco I ordered last time I was out) I don't ask for it to be returned. I'm a model customer, except I won't tip.

I'm not doing it to be cheap, or out of spite, or in disrespect for the service personnel. I'm doing it to apply pressure so that things will change for the better

Think of it as passive guerilla tactics against a broken system

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SatansMaggotyCumFart -2 points 3 years ago

Haha. Rosy. Rosy pink.

Mr. Pink.

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rosymind 2 points 3 years ago

Cute :)

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