I'm sorry to say that this is indeed a true story, obviously heavily edited to remove any identifying features of the parties involved.

I do have an update for you all! When we woke up, I didn't want to talk about the phone situation so I just casually dropped burritos into a conversation earlier, waited a while, then asked them to be honest about where they had gone the night before. They came clean about the free burrito. From what I can gather, it sounded like a shameful stress induced feast that they didn't want to reveal to me. I've had similar issues in the past and boy do I empathise. I told them to either be more open in the future or at least get better at hiding it 🤣 my heart can't take any more secret burrito rendezvous.

A genuine thanks for all the comments, there has been some really heartfelt advice here 🥰 I'm not saying either of us acted perfectly in this situation and it is nice to be able to talk about it anonymously with all you lovely people.