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Please discuss.

3 years ago by HiddenLayer5 to c/memes

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dap 107 points 3 years ago

This appears to be a variation of the "standwich." Please see the attached for an example.

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Loid 33 points 3 years ago

The question is, if this appears on a captcha asking to click only on the sandwich images. Would you click on it?

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CileTheSane 1 point 3 years ago

Considering the captcha doesn't actually know, and just judges if you are correct based off of other users entries I would click on it. My guess is most users would click it, but it's ambiguous enough that you'd probably pass the captcha either way.

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xia 3 points 3 years ago

Ah, so this one would be a double horseshoe standwich?

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FollyDolly 2 points 3 years ago

Ah, but of course!

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Blackmist 2 points 3 years ago

I miss when Tesco Value ham would label itself as such, rather than hiding behind fake farm names.

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MsPenguinette 87 points 3 years ago

It's clearly two sandwichs.

The bold move would be to have the other side have the peanut butter and jelly swapped around. I'd call that the ouroboroswich.

[edit] what if it only had 1 cut? I think that'd be a taco

[edit 2] a torus cut once makes a cylinder. So really, it's a double decker sandwich

[edit 3] but it's cylinders that loop back on themselves. Is it a mobiuswhich or a Klien Wich?

[edit n] help

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9point6 28 points 3 years ago

I'm here for this energy

Okay hear me out, what about the peanut butter on one axis (either conventional sandwich, or this rotated 90 degrees) and the jelly as it is here

What are we dealing with then? This might transcend the cube system of food categorisation.

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Gork 14 points 3 years ago

The Cube Rule is the most definitive and authoritative categorization of food topology I have encountered. I refer to it often in food related arguments.

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9point6 5 points 3 years ago

But what is the abomination I've described? I don't think it fits.

I'm not ready for a world where the cube rule isn't all encompassing

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Gork 5 points 3 years ago

Although the bagel half on the bottom and the top are split toroids, topologically they are flat (you can 'deform' it into a flat plane if you squish it). This is assuming it hasn't been cut down the center as well.

The filling of PB&J is between the two starches. Therefore this is Food Type 2: Sandwich.

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coffeebiscuit 7 points 3 years ago

It’s an infinity sandwich.

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Entertainmeonly 5 points 3 years ago

A mugenwich?

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itsJoelle 5 points 3 years ago

I suppose it is neither a taco or a sand which, however it lives within the sandwich family. What's weird is if we take the inner radius as it runs towards zero it would look no different to a sandwich (save the weirdly thick bread that looks similar to a burger), but it would be topologically different shape.

I suppose it depends on if you consider a bagle split more naturally a sandwich or not, and, if so, then it matters if the if the space of the filling being connected matters or not.

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The_Cleanup_Batter 1 point 3 years ago

[edit] what if it only had 1 cut? I think that'd be a taco

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ramenshaman 74 points 3 years ago

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xia 15 points 3 years ago

Hmm... so a steak is a salad, and a salad is nachos? Something screwy here...

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donslaught 14 points 3 years ago

Salad is only nachos if it contains croutons, won ton strips, or some other form of free-floating non-structural starch.

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Ergologia 1 point 3 years ago

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stillwater 15 points 3 years ago

I'm amazed this page didn't have a featherless chicken labelled "Human"

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beteljuice 8 points 3 years ago

So answer is yes

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ToastedPlanet 6 points 3 years ago

It's sushi. The carbs form four sides of the cube.

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ludwig 8 points 3 years ago

Food identification war intensifies

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TheMightyHUG 57 points 3 years ago

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craftyindividual 14 points 3 years ago

The last time someone made a bagel with everything on it it put the universe in jeopardy.

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CileTheSane 1 point 3 years ago

The everything bagel needs to include smaller everything bagels on it or it doesn't include everything.

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craftyindividual 1 point 3 years ago

Recursion

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walter_wiggles 44 points 3 years ago

It's two sandwiches...topologically speaking.

If you take the traditional idea of a sandwich and draw a loop around the plane where the surfaces come together you get a mathematical sandwich.

Since the bagel abomination has two such areas and you can draw non-intersecting loops around each, it follows that there are indeed two sandwiches present.

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agressivelyPassive 5 points 3 years ago

That depends on your definition of a sandwichable surface. If crust can be buttered as well and is considered equal to cut surfaces (which, coming from a rye bread country, is certainly the case with these fluffy things), then this is simply a sandwich without filling in the middle. This might also be achieved by suboptimal spreading on a single surface.

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octoperson 5 points 3 years ago

I'm pretty sure it counts as a sandwich as defined by the ham sandwich theorem. The only part that might be debatable is that the filling is not a single connected volume, but that doesn't seem to be required by the proof.

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dan1101 42 points 3 years ago

It is a sandwich because the toppings are sandwiched between bread. But it's not a good sandwich.

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JazzAlien 5 points 3 years ago

Now, they wouldn't be toppings in this configuration, would they?

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Num10ck 6 points 3 years ago

middling

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ObviouslyNotBanana 3 points 3 years ago

Inbetwingers

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Neve8028 1 point 3 years ago

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donslaught 36 points 3 years ago

This is clearly a sandwich. The confusion comes from how absurdly sub-optimal its construction is.

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Alexstarfire 32 points 3 years ago

Top bun? Check

Bottom bun? Check

Yep, it's a sandwich. I'd like to see a video of you eating it now.

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foggy 30 points 3 years ago

Political lol

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HiddenLayer5 11 points 3 years ago

The most political a topic could possibly be, in fact.

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cdsigma 26 points 3 years ago

Every day we stray further from the light of lord

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ILikeBoobies 22 points 3 years ago

Yes but it’s not a very good one

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aport 22 points 3 years ago

Yes.

A hot dog is also a sandwich

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Creddit 20 points 3 years ago

Pretty sure flatbread predated leavened bread, so it’s reasonable to conclude tacos predated both hot dogs and sandwiches.

Conclusion: Hot dogs are tacos, sandwiches are broken tacos.

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HiddenLayer5 4 points 3 years ago

Are pizzas just unfinished tacos then?

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mihnt 5 points 3 years ago

Pizza is just an open face sandwich, but arguments can be made that New York style is a taco because most people fold it to consume it.

Have to ask yourself what a calzone is then.

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BarrelAgedBoredom 2 points 3 years ago

A calzone is a wrap/burrito. Unless uncrustables are in play and are recognized as their own distinct category. In which case a calzone is an uncrustable or vice versa

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Khotetsu 2 points 3 years ago

A loaf of bread.

Bread often has stuff baked into it, so what's the difference between a loaf of bread with cheese or nuts baked into it vs. a loaf with chicken, cheese, and marina sauce baked into it.

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Creddit 2 points 3 years ago

Sort of. As the other commenter pointed out, they are open face.

Sandwiches are broken tacos, but pizzas are not broken.

Pizzas are open face tacos.

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Num10ck 1 point 3 years ago

and thus kitchens are just covered campfires now?

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vrojak 8 points 3 years ago

So sandwich is the parent category, and hot dogs are a type of sandwich? Are burgers, too?

Oh no I accidentally started researching, there is an actual British Sandwich Association that defines sandwich as "any form of bread with a filling, generally assembled cold". The USDA, however, has different definitions for open and closed sandwiches and it depends on the percentage amounts of bread and meat... I guess if you put cheese on your bread it's not a sandwich at all!

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uglo 8 points 3 years ago

Heresy! I demand the BSA's definition to be accepted and adopted everywhere! "if you put cheese on your bread its not a sandwich at all!" - this is unbeliveable and hilarious

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Zink 3 points 3 years ago

I know, lol. Seriously how many well-known sandwiches have “cheese” or “melt” right in their name?!

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queermunist 7 points 3 years ago

What? No.

A hot dog is a taco.

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aport 7 points 3 years ago

A taco is also a sandwich

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Creddit 1 point 3 years ago

Ehem, well actually leavened bread came out way after flatbreads - so sandwiches are broken tacos.

It’s all tacos.

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NotSpez 3 points 3 years ago

Well, everyone knows that.

But by current BSA standards a taco is a sandwitch. So it checks out.

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ryathal 3 points 3 years ago

Taco is Mexican for sandwich.

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notabot 19 points 3 years ago

What do we call it if it is also cut and filled in the conventional bagel plane?

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eldain 15 points 3 years ago

xandwich

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notabot 5 points 3 years ago

I like the way you think. That also leaves open the possibly of the yandwich, which is cut into three equal segments in the same way as the opening post, and the xyandwich when you combine the x and y options.

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GreenMario 4 points 3 years ago

Tesserwich is a possibility if you start fucking around in the Fourth dimension.

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notabot 3 points 3 years ago

I've been trying to work out if, by cutting a helix around the bagel, you can create a mobius type sandwich with two, interlinked parts.

Moving in to higher dimensional bagel cutting is probably the sort of thing you can really make one's brain hurt.

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eldain 4 points 3 years ago

Not a Δandwich?

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notabot 2 points 3 years ago

Now I'm just getting hungry.

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bastion 2 points 3 years ago

The right answer.

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ironhydroxide 1 point 3 years ago

Not an xorwich?

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captain_aggravated 1 point 3 years ago

An xorwich would be crosscut, or ripped, but not both.

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original_ish_name 2 points 3 years ago

Sandwich cut in half

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notabot 1 point 3 years ago

I realise that you are correct, but which way is the sandwich, and which way is the cut? It's filled on both planes.

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idunnololz 16 points 3 years ago

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Gigan 6 points 3 years ago

According to that, I think OP would have a sandwich.

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xavier666 15 points 3 years ago

Some men aren't looking for anything logical, like money. They can't be bought, bullied, reasoned, or negotiated with. Some men just want to watch the world burn.

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deathbird 14 points 3 years ago

Goodbye horseshoe theory hello half-bagel theory.

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DonutGalaxy 5 points 3 years ago

The theory of a donut shaped galaxy is genius. I stole it from Homer Simpson.

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emberwit 13 points 3 years ago

No, a sandwich is made from slices of bread.

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ThunderWhiskers 14 points 3 years ago

Is this not a piece of bread that was sliced in half?

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emberwit 2 points 3 years ago

doesn't make it slices

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xthexder 8 points 3 years ago

What about an Ice Cream Sandwich? No bread, but sandwich is in the name.

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nxdefiant 11 points 3 years ago

Cube rule says starch is on the outside, so it's a sandwich.

IF you refuse to recognize the cookie as a starch, then an ice cream sandwich is a salad.

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Daft_ish 2 points 3 years ago

Salad, mah fav

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emberwit 1 point 3 years ago

thus no sandwich

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dontcarebear 4 points 3 years ago

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AnUnusualRelic 4 points 3 years ago

Are you suggesting that baguette is not bread?

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merc 3 points 3 years ago

It's definitely not slices of bread.

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AnUnusualRelic 1 point 3 years ago

Maybe it's not pre-sliced industrial factory produced pseudo-bread. Assuming that's what you mean.

But as you described it, it's definitely slices of bread.

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dontcarebear 1 point 3 years ago

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AngryCommieKender 3 points 3 years ago

A French Sub, so L'Englouti.

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emberwit 1 point 3 years ago

a stuffed baguette

you cant just label any combination of food that contains bread a sandwich

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HonoraryMancunian 13 points 3 years ago

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PipedLinkBot 4 points 3 years ago

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Brigid_the_wolf 12 points 3 years ago

It's a bagel "standwich"

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Shard 12 points 3 years ago

Technical definition is a 3-Torus sandwich, defined as any sandwich that is homeomorphic to the Cartesian product of three circles.

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been_jamming 1 point 3 years ago

Isn't it S_1 x S_1 x [0, 1] here though?

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ehrenschwan 11 points 3 years ago

I'd say yes but you definitely have to eat it in that direction.

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Maddie 10 points 3 years ago

No, this is a red flag of sociopathic tendency

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BornVolcano 8 points 3 years ago

That, I believe, is what we refer to as an "abomination"

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WanderingCrow 7 points 3 years ago

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CileTheSane 1 point 3 years ago

Some people just want to watch the world burn.

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cryptosporidium140 7 points 3 years ago

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MrVilliam 4 points 3 years ago

Similar to tomatoes being botanically a fruit

More specifically, tomatoes are berries, as are bananas. But strawberries are not berries at all.

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ObviouslyNotBanana 1 point 3 years ago

Cucumbers though

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sag 6 points 3 years ago

It's clearly a burger.

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ohlaph 6 points 3 years ago

Strange flex, but okay.

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LarkinDePark 0 points 3 years ago

Ugh reddit shiver.

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samus12345 6 points 3 years ago

It is a kind of sandwich.

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thantik 5 points 3 years ago

It fits the description.

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AeonFelis 4 points 3 years ago

It's two conjoined sandwiches.

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BNE 4 points 3 years ago

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GreatGrapeApe 4 points 3 years ago

No and only demented sociopaths put jelly on the bagel.

Peanut butter goes best with cinnamon raisin bagels should you choose a bagel.

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hOrni 1 point 3 years ago

Nothing goes with raisins. They are an abomination and should be outlawed. Especially in baked goods.

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TopShelfVanilla -1 points 3 years ago

You're no fun at parties and nobody really likes you.

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LuckingFurker 3 points 3 years ago

No it isn't. I won't be clarifying my position

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Lazerbeams2 3 points 3 years ago

Technically it is, but that doesn't mean I don't hate it

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thorbot 3 points 3 years ago

Yesn’t it ain’t not no sandwich

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GrammatonCleric 3 points 3 years ago

Abhorrent bagel

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RIP_Cheems 3 points 3 years ago

If I have to see another "is this a sandwich" mind twister, I'm gonna scream.

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pc_admin 2 points 3 years ago

I don't know but it makes me hungry.

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saltnotsugar 1 point 3 years ago

There are some technologies that should remain forbidden…for the safety of all.

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sub_ubi 1 point 3 years ago

If you have a strong opinion either way that's fine with me, I don't want to argue it with you.

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Eheran 0 points 3 years ago

You pervert!

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Hank -7 points 3 years ago

It hits all criteria for me to define it as a sandwich. I can eat it and I can stick my dick in it.

A baby is also a sandwich.

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