Anon learns about astronomy

21 days ago by 🍹Early to RISA 🧉 to c/greentext

cannedtuna 73 points 21 days ago

Except that you know… the earth is spinning and all that and the stars don’t stay in one spot. You know, ignoring that bit.

path: 0 25951690, hotness: undefined, score: 73, children: 11
Lumidaub 42 points 21 days ago

It's Polaris. Polaris is screaming at us (to take play Control).

path: 0 25951690 25951802, hotness: undefined, score: 42, children: 0
RickyRigatoni 30 points 21 days ago

You're fact checking a greentext horror story?

path: 0 25951690 25954520, hotness: undefined, score: 30, children: 1
philipp_ 4 points 20 days ago

Wouldn't be a greentext without somebody calling it fake (and gay, probably because of time spent with the brother).

path: 0 25951690 25954520 25964611, hotness: undefined, score: 4, children: 0
Jolteon 25 points 21 days ago

A lot of modern telescopes can easily track a target. In fact, in an otherwise quiet room, the sound of those teeny little motors going could probably sound like a faint scream.

path: 0 25951690 25952153, hotness: undefined, score: 25, children: 2
yermaw 17 points 21 days ago

My dad had a super fancy one when I was a kid, came with a CD that had all the co-ordinates plugged in.

You tell it the date, time and your coordinates and it'll show you a list of cool shit you can see. Choose one and it just finds it for you.

path: 0 25951690 25952153 25953390, hotness: undefined, score: 17, children: 1
ApathyTree 2 points 21 days ago

I almost wish my telescope was like that, just for object tracking, but it would have been several hundred more than this sucker cost (an 8 inch dobsonian - big ol’ telescope)

And the only reason I want it is if you throw enough magnification on such a big telescope, stuff moves through the field of view REALLY fast. If you look at the moon, with a 2x and 5x lense coupled, you can feel the earth rotate. Its wild and something I enjoy showing people. But it does make it difficult to really look at stuff. Especially when i have non-skywatchers with me and I have to re-position it myself every 30 seconds.

path: 0 25951690 25952153 25953390 25961086, hotness: undefined, score: 2, children: 0
Deme 12 points 21 days ago

Unless they're looking through the telescope at the same time of the night as when he found the star. Previous night was a wider survey and the kid just wrote down when the star in question passed the field of view. How long there is time to hear the screaming just depends on the magnification/fov.

path: 0 25951690 25952164, hotness: undefined, score: 12, children: 0
SpruceBringsteen 3 points 21 days ago

I think its saying he stayed in one spot and never moved?

path: 0 25951690 25951875, hotness: undefined, score: 3, children: 0
bjoern_tantau 2 points 21 days ago

Which means the horrors were already on Earth!

path: 0 25951690 25961100, hotness: undefined, score: 2, children: 0
ddplf -7 points 21 days ago

Explain constellations

path: 0 25951690 25951884, hotness: undefined, score: -7, children: 1
Glytch 26 points 21 days ago

Constellations are collections of stars that stay in the same place relative to each other, but they all move across the night sky as the Earth spins. We also see them at different angles depending on what time of year it is.

path: 0 25951690 25951884 25951961, hotness: undefined, score: 26, children: 0
SkaveRat 59 points 21 days ago

yes, yes. the agony star. we've all seen it

path: 0 25951931, hotness: undefined, score: 59, children: 2
A_Union_of_Kobolds 35 points 21 days ago

path: 0 25951931 25954376, hotness: undefined, score: 35, children: 0
tetris11 7 points 21 days ago

Yeah god people, read a book

path: 0 25951931 25953973, hotness: undefined, score: 7, children: 0
Enkrod 44 points 21 days ago

If you look at Polaris

still the Pole Star leers down from the same place in the black vault, winking hideously like an insane watching eye which strives to convey some strange message, yet recalls nothing save that it once had a message to convey. Sometimes, when it is cloudy, I can sleep.

you might see The Colour Out of Space,

The colour, [...] was almost impossible to describe; and it was only by analogy that they called it colour at all.
[...]
No watcher can ever forget that sight, and Ammi stared blankly at the stars of Cygnus, Deneb twinkling above the others, where the unknown colour had melted into the Milky Way.

and hear The Music of Erich Zann.

Yet when I looked from that highest of all gable windows, looked while the candles sputtered and the insane viol howled with the night-wind, I saw no city spread below, and no friendly lights gleaming from remembered streets, but only the blackness of space illimitable; unimagined space alive with motion and music, and having no semblance to anything on earth. And as I stood there looking in terror, the wind blew out both the candles in that ancient peaked garret, leaving me in savage and impenetrable darkness with chaos and pandemonium before me, and the daemon madness of that night-baying viol behind me.

path: 0 25952502, hotness: undefined, score: 44, children: 5
redhorsejacket 12 points 21 days ago

Heh, glad someone else immediately thought, "Well, that's Lovecraftian". Also, man, I should dust off my collection of his fiction. Abominable human being, but his writing sure is evocative, if a touch on the purple side.

path: 0 25952502 25958126, hotness: undefined, score: 12, children: 4
Enkrod 3 points 21 days ago

Yeah, no, bad writer, great writing. I never realized how immensely quotable and eloquent short excerpts of his works are, until I looked up those specific quotes.

If the sculptured maps and pictures in that pre-human city had told truly, these cryptic violet mountains could not be much less than 300 miles away; yet none the less sharply did their dim elfin essence jut above that remote and snowy rim, like the serrated edge of a monstrous alien planet about to rise into unaccustomed heavens. Their height, then, must have been tremendous beyond all known comparison—carrying them up into tenuous atmospheric strata peopled by such gaseous wraiths as rash flyers have barely lived to whisper of after unexplainable falls. Looking at them, I thought nervously of certain sculptured hints of what the great bygone river had washed down into the city from their accursed slopes—and wondered how much sense and how much folly had lain in the fears of those Old Ones who carved them so reticently.

The language is just... sublime, his vocabulary is such a vast vessel that I - as a non-native speaker - am happy enough to understand when read but will likely never be able to command myself.

path: 0 25952502 25958126 25958937, hotness: undefined, score: 3, children: 3
Hadriscus 1 point 20 days ago

Yea I dig it too

path: 0 25952502 25958126 25958937 25963694, hotness: undefined, score: 1, children: 0
Texas_Hangover 1 point 21 days ago

Overly long-winded if you ask me.

path: 0 25952502 25958126 25958937 25959667, hotness: undefined, score: 1, children: 1
Enkrod 2 points 20 days ago

You're from the US, Tex?

path: 0 25952502 25958126 25958937 25959667 25964151, hotness: undefined, score: 2, children: 0
FinjaminPoach 30 points 21 days ago
path: 0 25952415, hotness: undefined, score: 30, children: 0
Varesti 27 points 21 days ago

path: 0 25951970, hotness: undefined, score: 27, children: 3
Unique_Emerald_Sol_I 3 points 21 days ago

Take your upvote and get out

path: 0 25951970 25962061, hotness: undefined, score: 3, children: 0
Fmstrat 2 points 17 days ago

How did this not come to mind instantly for me. Nice.

path: 0 25951970 26019699, hotness: undefined, score: 2, children: 0
Etterra 2 points 20 days ago

path: 0 25951970 25965454, hotness: undefined, score: 2, children: 0
Feathercrown 20 points 21 days ago

They don't like you watching them

path: 0 25958408, hotness: undefined, score: 20, children: 0
blackberry28 20 points 20 days ago

path: 0 25963406, hotness: undefined, score: 20, children: 0
AviAdi 16 points 21 days ago

2spooky4me2

path: 0 25951648, hotness: undefined, score: 16, children: 2
mycodesucks 6 points 21 days ago

3spooky5me

path: 0 25951648 25952802, hotness: undefined, score: 6, children: 1
snooggums 1 point 21 days ago

1spooky69me

path: 0 25951648 25952802 25955841, hotness: undefined, score: 1, children: 0
naught101 15 points 21 days ago

Hypothesis: tree full of fruit bats

path: 0 25957233, hotness: undefined, score: 15, children: 0
wieson 14 points 21 days ago

Not pictures: lil bro under his covers pranking his brother by screaming faintly

path: 0 25951691, hotness: undefined, score: 14, children: 0
TubularTittyFrog 12 points 21 days ago

mom was trying to keep it quiet but dad was giving it to her HARD.

path: 0 25960778, hotness: undefined, score: 12, children: 1
FavouriteShapes 8 points 20 days ago

Many such cases.

path: 0 25960778 25963120, hotness: undefined, score: 8, children: 0
MutantTailThing 10 points 20 days ago

This is not the kind of shit I should be reading at 4am

path: 0 25967416, hotness: undefined, score: 10, children: 0
affenlehrer 8 points 21 days ago

Why does a telescope magnify sound? Or is a psychological type of cosmic horror where the sparkle patterns of the stars hypnotize you?

path: 0 25951954, hotness: undefined, score: 8, children: 2
paraproto 17 points 21 days ago

It is a shittext. But yes, the implication is of psychological nature.

path: 0 25951954 25952151, hotness: undefined, score: 17, children: 0
SavinDWhales 7 points 21 days ago

Perhaps he was looking at a porn star?

path: 0 25951954 25958992, hotness: undefined, score: 7, children: 0
Lumidaub 6 points 21 days ago

Hello, yes, I don't need this in my life. Thank you.

path: 0 25951651, hotness: undefined, score: 6, children: 0
TootSweet 2 points 21 days ago

7-year-old brother with Masonna really quiet on his bluetooth speaker system: 😈

path: 0 25961096, hotness: undefined, score: 2, children: 0
greentext
greentext

@sh.itjust.works

login for more options
8833
2063
4730

This is a place to share greentexts and witness the confounding life of Anon. If you're new to the Greentext community, think of it as a sort of zoo with Anon as the main attraction.

Be warned:

  • Anon is often crazy.
  • Anon is often depressed.
  • Anon frequently shares thoughts that are immature, offensive, or incomprehensible.

If you find yourself getting angry (or god forbid, agreeing) with something Anon has said, you might be doing it wrong.

go to feed...