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Duranie

@midwest.social

Duranie 53 points 3 years ago

In this case Finland actually takes care of their people and homelessness isn't a problem there. They're just really polite introverts who I might guess prefer sitting alone as opposed to on a bench close to others.

Source - my introverted niece met a Fin, fell in love, moved to Finland and is in absolute heaven. Her husband has visited the States a few times and is always overwhelmed with the casual social interactions with strangers in public.

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Duranie 39 points 3 years ago

While I get your point, it didn't read as supportive to me. To me it read as a statement of "this is what I observed" not "this is my judgement of the kind of person he is."

Like if someone asked me what kind of person a coworker was. If my answer was "I saw them do their job" it can be a factual statement of my experience and really, isn't necessarily helpful. It just means I didn't witness them doing anything bad.

Edit - rereading as someone just posted a copy of the letter. While I can see some focus on positive interactions with his daughter, it still strikes me as a factual "this is what I observed" and far less the emotional supportive standpoint that bled through from some of the other letters that were submitted.

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Duranie 34 points 3 years ago

"bent out of shape over something you can't even remember"

I'm pretty sure he probably remembers he's been circumcised whenever he goes to the bathroom, takes a shower, changes his underwear...

If a person is drugged or blackout drunk is it ok to rape them if they don't remember?

Is it ok for a parent to put tattoos on their child if they get it done while the baby is young enough not to remember?

Someone can come to terms with a situation and still be allowed to be angry about it.

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Duranie 26 points 3 years ago

I think that was a smartly written letter from the standpoint that he told the truth of his observations from his perspective, but made no attempt to sway opinion of Danny's character. Under the circumstances if you really feel compelled to submit a letter, it's the honest way of doing it.

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Duranie 23 points 3 years ago

Buying in a lower cost of living area is easier when you don't have to consider things like school districts for children, availability of public transportation to get to work, or even safe walkable areas to get groceries.

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Duranie 22 points 3 years ago

Boy I wish someone would have shared this with me when I was working 2 jobs, struggling to afford rent, raising teenagers, and getting home at 11pm when I had to get up at 6:30am. If I would have just worked a little harder...

I appreciate that you're trying to be helpful, but it feels like telling a depressed person to just eat right and exercise and they'll get over it.

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Duranie 22 points 3 years ago

Butt crayon.

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Duranie 20 points 3 years ago

We can do both. The problem is the people that believe certain people don't "deserve" help.

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Duranie 20 points 3 years ago

When I've seen this I've wondered if the dog got into some wet concrete, tar, or something irreversibly damaging to their coat.

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Duranie 16 points 3 years ago

As an older Gen-Xer, who had married another older Xer far too young (because we were brought up that all we needed to do was get a job and life would be awesome) I can agree that some in my age range are definitely watered down boomers. Which is also a fair part of the reason why he's my ex husband now.

As the mother of 3 Gen Z sons, I couldn't be more proud of the amazing men they're becoming, and couldn't be more disgusted about the conditions that some of my generation and those before me have created for them.

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Duranie 15 points 3 years ago

There's an actual quality true crime podcast called Crime Junkie, and an associated podcast specifically dedicated to cold cases called The Deck. It's a whole thing for some people, but occasionally a listener hits on something and makes a phone call that gets the ball rolling again.

I listen because I find it interesting, but that's the extent of it. Some people it's truly a hobby, or more to chase information down.

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Duranie 15 points 3 years ago

Or adults!

I used to teach massage at a vocational school, and for multiple reasons had a "no phones" policy on the classroom (distraction, exposed body parts, and others.) I could have ignored it during lectures except that the overlap of students on their phone and the ones asking to re-explain information or just lost as to what they're supposed to be doing was nearly perfect.

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Duranie 14 points 3 years ago

As a massage therapist that used to work in education (director of education at a massage school and taught anatomy/pathology) results will vary wildly across the States. The majority of states only started licensing in the last 10-15 years, and of course requirements for licensing and supervision varies. Some schools teach enough anatomy to get their students to pass the tests, then focus their time teaching spa type massage (aromatherapy, wraps, hot stones, etc.) or energy work. Not saying there's anything wrong with that, but it serves a different purpose.

There are definitely schools that exist that focus more on therapeutic/rehabilitative work, but even then the challenge is finding a therapist with an up to date approach who doesn't buy the old school "no pain no gain" who kicks the shit out of you. Massage shouldn't hurt. But if your find the right therapist for you, they're worth their weight in gold.

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Duranie 13 points 3 years ago

I work in hospice and have seen patients (and family members) 90+ who I could have mistaken for late 60s - early 70s. I also recently met a patient's wife who was 20 years younger than him, but was in worse shape and looked his age (82) if not older. Genetics and life experience are wild.

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Duranie 12 points 3 years ago

I'm right there with you Lol!

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Duranie 12 points 3 years ago

I see someone down voted you for some reason. In case it's because of the misconception that audiobooks aren't as good as reading, several years back there was some research which showed that as far as the brain is concerned, there's essentially no difference.

"Looking at the brain scans and data analysis, the researchers saw that the stories stimulated the same cognitive and emotional areas, regardless of their medium. It’s adding to our understanding of how our brains give semantic meaning to the squiggly letters and bursts of sound that make up our communication."

https://www.discovermagazine.com/...

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Duranie 12 points 3 years ago

Almost definitely. They're putting it on 6 days a week, and the familiarity of the music and voices would lend itself to be relaxing.

My only question is are they doing this for themselves, or is it a child that they're lulling to sleep?

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Duranie 11 points 3 years ago

I'm early Gen X with a bunch of much older boomer siblings. By the time I came along my mom was too frazzled to teach me "women's work" of cooking and cleaning. I relied on prepackaged, frozen, and just a couple basic recipes to get me through.

By the time I was 27-28 I started having kids. I took the opportunity to basically watch 24/7 food network (before all the competitions and game shows) and learned to cook. My sons? I started teaching them to cook as soon as I could get them to participate without hurting themselves.

But that's me. I enjoy cooking, so I went for it. Some people don't even like cooking, or enjoy food enough to care beyond eating as unavoidable body maintenance.

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Duranie 11 points 3 years ago

"You might have to look at different areas and consider the differences."

Always, but there are certain factors that aren't so pliable. Getting a loan based on your income at a stable job means that you need to live within a reasonable area to continue to access that job. Six years ago when I was looking for a house I could have moved to a lower cost of living area, but that would have meant a 90 minute commute or changing jobs (at which time would have been an irresponsibly risky move.) Another factor was the question of changing school districts, and custody arrangements with the kids father. I wasn't, but I know some who are restricted by custody agreements where they are required to live in certain districts or within X number of miles of the other parent. People in those situations don't get to shop around and find other areas to live.

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Duranie 11 points 3 years ago

Calm down Satan.

I worked at a massage school and was running the student clinic early on a Saturday morning. About 8:30am a student microwaved some fish for breakfast. We got to smell that shit most of the day.

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