There’s lots of great comments here, especially pointing out that the “problem” may lie with his anxiety/neurodivergency more than specifically whether or not he’s on the ace spectrum. There’s just a couple things I want to add, just in case you haven’t thought about it before. Obligatory, I’m not a doctor or relationship expert, I’m just an idiot on the internet giving my two cents based on one post about your relationship. You guys know yourselves best

Regardless of whether or not he’s ace, making you feel like a creep for wanting sex is a communication issue. He should not be making you feel like that. Think about it like this. You would never call him broken for not wanting sex right? You don’t think he’s messed up, you’re just trying to understand him right? You don’t want him to feel bad for how he is. But he is making you feel bad for wanting sex, which is perfectly normal and okay thing to want from a romantic partner. If you were demanding sex it would obviously be a problem, but there’s a difference between communicating boundaries and making you feel like shit. He’s well within his rights to say “hey, sex makes me uncomfortable and I want a non sexual romantic relationship with you. Please do not try to initiate sex or talk about sexual topics.” But making you feel like a creep is kinda shitty. If it makes him uncomfortable then he needs to talk to you and you guys need to establish clear boundaries. If he avoids those conversations then he’s forcing you to guess where his boundaries are. That’s not good for either of you

It sounds like you want him to think about if he’s ace/greysexual bc you’re looking for an answer for what’s going on bc you feel like it’s your fault. Like you’re not making yourself attractive or desirable enough for him. Ace/greysexual are just labels that help us describe how things are. So rather than focusing on the label (since he doesn’t seem eager to explore labels for himself) just focus on what he’s described. He said he doesn’t like genitals and rarely thinks of sex, which sounds pretty similar to someone on the ace spectrum that’s sex averse. So if its easier for you to think of him as on the ace spectrum for your perspective of feeling undesirable the I think it’s okay to do that. Obviously don’t try to assign him the label by calling him ace if he’s not comfortable with that, but if in your brain when you feel undesirable, you remind yourself “he just doesn’t/rarely feels sexual attraction. It’s just how he is” I think that’s okay to do

Also, if you haven’t asked him before, I would ask what he was feeling and what motivated him to have sex with you the few times he did. You mentioned once was when you had brought up him maybe being ace and he got upset and then you had sex. I would ask if he was actually in the mood for sex or if he just felt like he was supposed to. If he was actually in the mood then I would explore what about that moment caused that. If he wasn’t though, then explore what made him feel like he was supposed to be. Is it a matter of his masculinity, that he feels like a “real man” should want sex? Was he just trying to avoid the conversation? Did he feel guilty towards you? Exploring some of these questions could help you guys come to a better understanding of each other

I also want to say this, just so you’ve heard it: I know you said you love him and would never leave him, but please remember that a relationship doesn’t have to be romantic to be important and loving and intimate. It sounds like sex is fairly important to you in a romantic relationship whereas it doesn’t seem to be for him. That’s okay. You two can love each other and care for each other and still be best friends without being in a romantic relationship. And removing the romantic part—and therefore the pressures of wanting sex or to feel desirable to him—could make the rest of the relationship smoother. I just don’t want you to think that your relationship would lose value or love if you were no longer romantic partners or for you to think you’re “giving up” on him or the relationship. If you want to end the romantic relationship, you would just be changing the nature of your relationship, not breaking it off completely. Again, I just wanted to say that to make sure you’ve heard it from somewhere or someone

I wouldn’t put it past him to deport her and get a new, younger trophy wife…

That would be a pretty good distraction, although I think I would need labor protections on top of that to be really distracted

There’s a lot of doomerism happening in these comments, so I’m just gonna add in that yes, I do think there’s a chance. A small chance, but a chance nonetheless

Right now shit sucks real bad. People know this. That’s why Trump won the first time. He ran as an anti-establishment everything candidate and people—not just his bigoted cultists—ate it up. But things didn’t get better. So then people voted for Biden bc he was the opposition to Trump who had become the establishment as the sitting president. And Biden won and shit still sucked. So then they went back to Trump bc there was no viable republican or democrat candidate outside of Trump and Biden/Harris. (Yes Bernie should have been the answer but America is currently a two party system and he was robbed of a primary election.)

So now that everything sucks and is getting worse and we’ve tried republicans and democrats and none of it is working and most candidates refuse to talk about real issues like affordability, people are starting to say “fine. I’ll find a different candidate then.”

And that’s how we got Zohran Mamdani, an openly democratic socialist as mayor of New York City. All across the country progressive candidates are using this momentum to primary out establishment dems. Not all are winning, but many of the races are close, like Kat Abughazaleh’s race. Even that helps because it shows dems that if they want to keep their seat as the controlled opposition so they can keep getting their bribes, then they have to change their messaging and priorities. People aren’t satisfied with a campaign to return to pre-Trump business as usual. People want a candidate that works for them

So check who’s on the ballot of your dem primaries (which are happening rn and through the summer depending on where you live) and see if there are any progressive candidates and do what you can to support them. Donate, volunteer, spread the word, and most importantly, show up and vote in the primary and the elections in November. Even local candidates like city council members and judges can have a lot of power if they have enough numbers and the support of the people

I know a lot of people on lemmy say that America is beyond repair and that the only answer at this point is a violent revolution but not only is this not realistic, it’s not helpful. A violent revolution would be devastating and the amount of lives lost would be horrifying. Theres also the fact that most violent revolutions result in a military authority taking power rather than a true democratic rebuilding. It’s much easier to fantasize about a violent revolution than it is to do the slow, tedious work of creating real change from the ground up

There’s no need to jump to the worst case scenario when we have a prime opportunity to make real change and build grassroots movements. Like I said, this is our chance to capitalize on people’s anger and dissatisfaction with the system to build class consciousness and grassroots movements. Do what you can, even if it doesn’t seem like a lot, and stay hopeful. We’ll get through this together by supporting each other

Of fucking course palantir is involved

Okay, students being stupid enough to agree to this makes sense bc they’re kids, but how did that teacher even come up with that idea, let alone actually do it?? That’s actual wife-hating behavior to think traumatizing her to “save her” is a good idea. Hopefully she finalized the divorce while he was in prison where he couldn’t hurt her

Wait, I thought he forced all the women he’s been involved with to do in vitro to make sure he only has sons (and that’s part of why he hates his daughter)?

It’d be awesome if California actually passes this and other states follow suit

Yes

Luna can examine still images taken from a security camera installed in the store, which the AI system can use to monitor employees. According to Petersson, Luna recently observed one of the employees using their phone during a particularly quiet hour, so the system updated the market's employee handbook to set stricter rules on workers’ phone usage.

“We saw that, and thought, wow, it feels dystopian,” Petersson said.

See the ai company is gonna market this as the ai “improving worker efficiency” and these corporations are gonna eat it up and we’ll all suffer

Yeah I think based on the later books, Peter would’ve been at most like maybe early thirties but probably only late twenties by the time they leave Narnia. And Lucy would’ve been like early to mid twenties. So they were adults, but certainly not old. In fact, it’s mentioned that Susan was courted by many princes and in The Horse and His Boy (warning: it’s super fucking racist and Islamophobic) she’s genuinely considering marrying someone but it turns out he’s pretty horrible. Right after the events of The Horse and His Boy, the kids hunt the white stag, see the lamppost, dimly remember the Wardrobe and end up back in our world

As for the horses, unlike in the movies, in the books it’s said that it’s very rare for people to ride talking horses bc talking horses are free in Narnia. So in the books they would’ve been riding normal horses that they probably wouldn’t bother punishing

Fr. They’re gonna “accidentally lose” all the records of who was receiving social security and how much they were getting, and they’re gonna make people reapply for it in person, but they have to bring their birth certificate, social security cart, passport, driver’s license with real id, 5 years of tax returns, and probably some new special certificate they start issuing to prove you’re maga a real citizen

But how will he get the centrist votes to win??? 🙄

I’m sure he’ll get a job offer to join the family business soon enough

It really depends on where you live in the USA. Where I live theres definitely people with guns but it’s unusual to see someone actually carrying one outside their home. Now my cousins live like 1-2 hours away (still in the same state) and it’s super common there for people to carry their gun on them at all times for some fucking reason. So my cousins are way more used to seeing guns than my siblings and I are

Preferably in a vat of acid

Looks like the bigger one is blocking the sunlight for the smaller one. Might wanna try moving the bigger one out of the way or just fully replanting the smaller one in an area with more sunlight. Other than that these sprouts seem to be doing pretty well ☺️

If you can convince the lowest white man he's better than the best colored man, he won't notice you're picking his pocket. Hell, give him somebody to look down on, and he'll empty his pockets for you. -Lyndon B. Johnson

Basically, people were already really racist against black people, so it’s easier to just continue that narrative. Build upon all the lies that were used to try and justify enslaving black people to make poor people, including other black people who believe the lies, blame black people for all their problems. That way we fight amongst ourselves instead of looking at and justly blaming the people with power and money

Before Trump’s rise it had become not-okay to be openly racist in most of the country so they had to pivot to openly attacking a different group: queer people, specifically trans people. (They were still very racist, just less open about it.) Blaming a minority or marginalized group is a classic conservative move to stop people from developing class consciousness and realizing that a poor cis straight white man has infinitely more in common with a poor queer trans black woman than a rich (like billionaire rich) cis straight white man

Tbf, part of why shit it so bad is because people are uneducated. If they can’t think for themselves then they’ll just believe whatever bullshit Fox News or the algorithm feeds them without critically thinking about it at all

I will say, it’s not all republicans. And I mean this in a “there’s still the slightest sliver of hope” kind of way, bc my church is hella republican leaning, with lots of old people, and they’re all fucking pissed at Trump and Elon. Like they’re calling him King Trump (mockingly) and a lot of them have complained about Elon doing the hitler salute. And yes, they’re the idiots that voted for him and are now complaining that he’s doing exactly what he said he’d do but this is our best time to try to push them back towards “normal” republicans rather than the openly fascist ones