Vampire Weekend were known as the pioneers of One Direction knock-offs, being largely successful with their approach of making music completely different than the famous boygroup even years before their start in music.

That is a very positive way to say "the oldest person in the world died"

You know what would be great? A good year for everyone who is not filthy rich.

Typisch. Den Bürgergeldempfängern werden Reichtümer zugeworden, sodass die sich sogar Luxusgüter wie Miete und Essen leisten können, aber der armer Millionär, der sich sein Geld regelrecht erkämpft, hat durch das Blut und den Schweiß seiner Arbeiter, darf sich nicht mal mehr jede Woche einen neuen Sportwagen zulegen ohne dass sein Kontostand stagniert.

That is disgusting! Why would you even post something like that? There is no way milk with mushrooms tastes good.

Apparently there are cougars in my area. I am scared now.

Your scientists were so preoccupied with canned chicken, they didn't stop to think if they should chicken.

As an enthusiast for both leaf soup and bean juice, it seems like most coffee drinkers think of cheap, old, dusty teabag tea, overboiled to taste like bitter vegetables in sewage water, while most tea drinkers think of pure dark overroasted burnt coffee, preground too finely (or as the worst kind of instant coffee), tasting like acid in an ash tray, like those are your only two options.

Both coffee and tea can be so terrible and also so wonderful. I guess my favorite coffee takes quite some preparation and my favorite tea cost me about as much as a junkie's crack addiction. But both can be really nice if you spend a little more money on a quality product and take the bit of effort to prepare it properly.

I would be so embarrassed if I were Mars. What a loser planet. Doesn't even have people.

The closest is Arkansas which starts with an "A". Which is pronounced similar to an "A".

Single moms these days need to start pulling themselves up by their bootstraps. What I would do if my rent was tripled, is just reduce my avocado toast intake by 30% and go on a nice vacation with all the additional money I saved up.

"Great job team! We've increased our profits more than ever before! Now we need your help more than ever to increase profits even further. Unfortunately we cannot afford to pay our employees more, because of the great investmemts we need to make to keep increasing our profits!"

Someone PLEASE make an AI cover of Ben Shapiro singing Welcome to the Black Parade.

Schwache Generation. In deinem Alter war man früher längst ein erfolgreicher und selbständiger Rassist.

I know you're trying to say the opposite, but what I'm thinking of when reading your comment, is that more money should be invested in building better infrastructure to make buses and trains more reliable. Like 90% of the traffic hindering the buses is made up of cars. With less cars, more people could ride buses, trains etc. and people could ride a lot more frequently. People shouldn't have to fumble through their purses, because busrides should be mostly free.

Wefwef is great

"Liberals scare the living shit out of me."

I would just call it beebleborg.

He's so many steps ahead he's already rushing for bankruptcy while others would still be thinking of ways to improve their site.

This has "this is the future that liberals want" kind of vibes.