Why don't I do it... anyway?

Tent hammock knife fishing rod. That covers food and shelter, I can get water in a few ways, and with the knife I can make a bow drill for fire.

LET'S TAKE THE CAR TO THE ZOO!

It comes as no surprise that nobody in this administration understands how water works.

Great, condition drivers to ignore children because "Mon dieu! Another one of those fakes!"

This is honestly brilliant. Get the US to promise something they are incapable of delivering in exchange for opening Hormuz, close Hormuz on the whole world when the US immediately fails to deliver.

Hormuz being closed is the US' fault. This is unassailable.

When a wage slave assassinates a CEO.

Nobody knows, Particle Man.

Electrolye is what your pour on a robot after you murder it.

Or tollways. Or license plate registration. Or that you're supposed to pay taxes on barter transactions.

Also hate myself.

No they need to make these imposters into lifelike robots that actually run out in traffic and cause accidents.

If you're lucky, nobody will see it and you can bury the robot in a shallow grave and pour electrolye on it to destroy the evidence.

We tax things that aren't cash all the time.

That's why I'm not the Commissioner.

I have so many Pyrex measuring cups. No reason, I just like them. Drives my wife crazy.

And people tend to get defensive when you point out their faults.

They're instinctively moving away from the horrific odor.

What I would give to be the person in charge of lesbian fires.

Heads up: this is what it looks like to do something instead of just handwringing. It's called "leverage".

I mean, strictly speaking yes, but that's like saying your quartz watch is a computer.