Add a third group: toddlers

I wish they had used the name Don instead of Gary

I have kids. It always sounded fun and interesting to have kids. But I had non negotiable bucket list to complete before trying. I was able to accomplish what I wanted in my career, travel to a few places, be financially stable, and find a partner that I wanted to build a family with. It took a lot of work to do all those things. I didn’t do those things so I could have kids, I did them for me. But accomplishing it all lead me to feel stable enough to care for children.

wont talk to you or take you seriously

It still sucks when it’s not intentional. I haven’t founded a business, but I sometimes get left out of high level meetings on projects that I’m leading.

Yes

“Women are weak.” Women’s strength is dismissed and underestimated.

That you’re not smart if you don’t have a college degree. It’s ridiculous too that a big motto in college is “Cs get degrees” and cheating happens regularly and yet graduates often still look down on people without degrees. I have people in my family with and without degrees and it’s enraging to watch some of the ones with the degrees be so dismissive of anyone without a degree, especially when they are actually dumber than those without.

Period pain that made it difficult to focus on regular activities. Also that any obgyn could treat endometriosis.

I hate when people ask me this because I don’t feel like I have any hobbies. I work long hours and am often too exhausted to do much when I’m off. I also have imposter syndrome about any hobby I start since I don’t keep them long due to getting bored or distracted. So I usually tell people I like to play with my dogs and take them for walks at the park.

Loose leaf tea and dark chocolate. I drink tea every day and drinking something nice puts me in a good mood, so I’m definitely going to do myself that favor. And dark chocolate is a delicious way to prevent unhealthy dessert cravings.

Acne with perimenopause/menopause. It makes sense when you think about it, but it’s not as talked about so I didn’t know. Becoming a hot sleeper. I can’t sleep with a blanket unless it’s really cold. And I’ll spend all day cold until it’s time to sleep and then I’m hot all night.

That’s so welcoming!

Women’s rights are not even legally enshrined everywhere, including in the U.S.

Fluently knowing multiple languages.

I didn’t have any food cravings, but I had a very strong food aversion that I still have a little bit of. Not surprising, but knowing heartburn was a possibility and then having it so bad I had trouble sleeping for the last few weeks until birth was awful. I also had a bone spur grow in my foot that’s causing pain and my doctor thinks pregnancy caused it.

Watching birth stories and taking a birthing class still can’t fully prepare you for giving birth the first time but I still strongly recommend it as it was really helpful to see a wide range of experiences. The next contraction can start before the first one ends. I was having 5 min long contractions and thought I was going insane because none of the classes mentioned it as a possibility. I wish I had asked my doula to come over then instead of suffering but it’s hard to make good decisions after a certain point.

A doctor I had interrupted me to say “no you don’t have that symptom” when I was explaining why I came in. I wasn’t giving a self diagnosis, just an explanation of my experience. The next day I switched to another doctor at the office who took me seriously.

Some of my roommates had never cleaned anything (dishes, laundry, etc) before and they were not from wealthy households. They also had eaten most meals as take out or prepared from a box so they were amazed by cooking from scratch.

Panic Pie

“Oh sorry I forgot to add you to [meeting about thing you own]”