Don't forget tubgirl, blue waffle, and basically anything on rotten.com

I used to torture my sister's boyfriends for a laugh but one day I befriended one and realised that this was the greatest troll of all time.

That's nature's pocket.

I use a scrubbing brush with a long handle.

How do you feel about minge?

I have the words "software engineer" in my job title but I hate it.

We aren't engineers, we're a bunch of undisciplined hackers, engineers have standards and ethics.

Programmer is my preferred term, or software developer.

Code monkey is also acceptable.

Guitar Hero was a bastard for this back in the day, every time I shut my eyes I'd see the notes coming for me.

So it's like web development?

I doubt it, but when does anything live up to the hype?

I reckon it'll be a decent game, but the multiplayer will likely be worse than GTA 5 as they try more things to get our money and fewer things to entertain us.

That's the way I used to play, the barbarian would lure them all in then I'd drop a fireball right on top of her.

Well, at least until the DM got sick of my shit and stopped clumping up the enemies.

I'm 36, I live in the UK, and I've driven a manual car since I was 17. I've only driven an automatic twice in my life and I'll probably never own one.

I'd use a better compression method and kick the can down the road to the next sucker to take the job.

The end credits music was quite good if I remember right though.

I will, in Burnout Revenge, because it's the superior game.

Have some deep fried pizza as an appetiser.

Start a tech company, then sell out to a corporation.

How different is it from regular Yorkshire?

I upgraded to the box but with all the cables neatly bundled with velcro, it's still a mess.

Raw on a sandwich or lightly fried in garlic butter. It's also great raw with a bit of oil, salt, and pepper, if you're feeling healthy.

Damn, I pay something like £65 for that speed in the UK.