I'm acearo and NB, I mostly figured out by seeing queer tumblr posts on pinterest (of all places). I was super jealous of trans boys/men posting and wished I "didn't have to be a girl". Looking back, I honestly never identified with my AGAB, and for a very long time didn't really get what the big deal was about different genders. Like even in kindergarten, kids tended to be friends with the same gender a lot, and I had no idea why I was just grouped in with the girls instead of just being a kid.

I thought I didn't have a choice and had to do all those things like it was mandatory. Just seeing people post about it online made me realize that "oh so being asexual is a thing!! I wanna be that!! I don't want to HAVE to do romance!" Yeah that was a relief.

This happened when I was about 14, so I learned I was different instead of having the whole having a crush and other shenanigans.