Bystander: She's apneic and has no pulse! I'm beginning CPR!

Commences compressions

Patient: Uh actually I have a boyfriend

After School Satan Club would be such a great name for a band.

Very disappointing not to see an #if 0 (my personal go-to for decades) in this meme. 😞

Aaaaaaaand it's gone! https://www.nbcnews.com/...

The text in the image represents how accurate it tends to be whenever I try to OCR a document.

Yes but you can't use a hard n

At least the NYT came up with an accurate headline this time.

My grandchildren are going to be very excited to get this new XBox! - some Grandma somewhere

This is one of the stupidest things I've seen online in a very long time, and of course I laughed for a solid minute. Well done, OP.

We need to find out what churches folks like this are being indoctrinated in and forcibly shut them down.

There is so much to unwrap here.

I actually really like that desktop background.

HURRY! HURRY HAAAARRRRRRRD!

My curling peeps will know what I'm talking about.

As an old Perl jockey, you can pry my backticks out of my cold, dead hands.

Actually, these are fucking great. Super outsidery. I'd buy but want to make sure the kids get the bulk of the profits, not the teacher.

If you think about it, every image we see on the internet could potentially have a Subway behind it.

And the program finally completed today! 🎉

Quick, someone should ask President Dukakis how he felt about the polls, putting him 15 points up on George H.W. Bush in the summer of '88.

Thelma Harper from Momma's Family

Damn dude, this is a deep cut.

Love it. Learned so much as a teenager about what was healthy and normal from her radio show in the 80s.