nothing ever happens
Lyra_Lycan 25 points a year ago
Rule 29/30 - There are no women on the Internet
Rule 32 - If there's no proof with a timestamp, it didn't happen
MeatPilot 57 points a year ago
Than he threw a punch at me and I expertly dodged it. As he fell on the ground I said "you even fall like a snowflake"
I would have kept it going if our manager didn't interject and tell him he was fired! Than the manager gave me a high-five and a raise on the spot.
ThePyroPython 28 points a year ago
Then the whole office clapped.
Sculptor9157 3 points a year ago
Was that before or after the call indicating the fast-tracked approval for the Nobel Peace Prize in all categories?
Faydaikin 143 points a year ago
Grew up in a Football (Soccer) town. The local team was a fairly big deal and it was pretty much mandatory to be a fan if you lived there.
I was never into sports and started referring to Football as "that game where a bunch of very fit men in shorts and knee-socks, frolic in a grass-field".
It was not appreciated.
elvith 105 points a year ago
"Why would I want to watch 22 men running around in circles chasing a ball for 90+ minutes? Can't you just give them 22 balls and every one of them will be happy!?"
Also not an appreciated response, LOL
peoplebeproblems 18 points a year ago
It gets better than that. It's where two lines of buff men line up to checkout another line of men. The quarterback is the top position because he gets to check out his team, the opponents team, and decides who and when to give his balls to. After communicating who is going to be receiving him, both lines embrace and the other team tries to get the ball often by throwing themselves at the guy with the ball.
Sometimes they'll actually pile on each other when it's unclear if the guy with the ball has been stopped.
Edit: nonono wait.. the quarter back is a switch
elvith 2 points a year ago
Reminds me of how I always declined, when someone passed a cigarette around:
So, you want me to take the tip of something longish, round, somewhat hard-but-still-soft and strange tasting into my mouth and then suck on it?! No, thanks.
GeriatricGambino 24 points a year ago
As an outside observer American football really seems keen about making guys wear really tight white pants. And every play begins with the quarterback miming wanting to reach inside some guy's butt ffs
peoplebeproblems 15 points a year ago
Every team sport is really an excuse for men to touch each other.
I was never into any team sports. At first I thought it was just boring. Now I wonder if it's because I'm just not attracted to other men at all.
GeriatricGambino 9 points a year ago
I don't know about that. Attraction to your sports mates shouldn't be your motivator anyway, for various reasons. Also in volleyball at least I think you're supposed to make room when it's not your time to play the ball so you're not supposed to touch anyone.
Regarding the tight white pants in American football I don't know how it's not fanservice to ogle better, which I find funny since the proportion of fans saying stupid shit like not washing their asshole because gay is probably alarmingly high
peoplebeproblems 8 points a year ago
Man that's similar to my take on baseball.
Tall, super-model-fit men swing wood at balls pitched by other men.
dmention7 6 points a year ago
Straight guy who enjoys baseball here -- youre not wrong!
At least baseball doesn't need to have a squad of attractive women bouncing around in skirts on the sidelines to affirm the viewers' sexuality.
masquenox 4 points a year ago
a squad of attractive women bouncing around in skirts on the sidelines
I always thought they put them there because without them there'd literally be nothing about the whole affair worth watching.
dmention7 3 points a year ago
I remember reading an analysis of in-play vs idle time of several popular pro sports, and American football was dead last, even behind baseball.
Which is fine on its own, but pretty ironic given how so many American football fans seem to sneer on soccer for being too boring.
peoplebeproblems 3 points a year ago
You know I never understood the point of cheerleaders other than being fun to look at.
Your explanation makes way more sense.
oftenawake 1 point 10 months ago path: 0 19550665 19551082 19553079 19556264 20196617, hotness: undefined, score: 1, children: 0
Smookey4444 3 points a year ago
Lol this is me basically. I find sports especially areas with heavily sport focused culture off putting and honestly revolting
Ohmmy 101 points a year ago
I feel like that scene with the Joker explaining how people react to others getting shot. There were two school shootings that day and the children getting shot got basically no attention because it's just part of the plan. Now I have people who complained endlessly about political correctness telling me I have to be politically correct.
SoleInvictus 16 points a year ago
For some people, it's not about what they believe or what's right. It's about avoiding accountability and winning, no matter what they said before or the cost.
UnderpantsWeevil 14 points a year ago
Leftists Marine Todd is a good bit.
You might not believe in him, but he believes in you.
agent_nycto 11 points a year ago
I moved to Columbus years ago and never heard this one, that's fucking hilarious
captainlezbian 1 point a year ago
Remember to vandalize your street signs. Otherwise big M wins
rambling_lunatic 6 points a year ago
I am sorry but can you please explain the joke
SirSamuel 10 points a year ago
At OSU games (and in the area generally) there's a call and answer chant where one person or group will shout "O-H!" and the remaining people will shout a reply of "I-O!"
I hate it here sometimes
Blue Jacket games are fun tho
captainlezbian 2 points a year ago
Oh the whole damn state does it.
peoplebeproblems 13 points a year ago
If I could communicate verbally well id totally use this lol
agamemnonymous 5 points a year ago
This is the way. Facts are for suckers, roasting is the new dialectic.
flippanarchy
@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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Flippant Anarchism. A lighter take on social criticism with the aim of agitation.
Post humorous takes on capitalism and the states which prop it up. Memes, shitposting, screenshots of humorous good takes, discussions making fun of some reactionary online, it all works.
This community is anarchist-flavored. Reactionary takes won't be tolerated.
Don't take yourselves too seriously. Serious posts go to !anarchism@lemmy.dbzer0.com
Rules
If you post images with text, endeavour to provide the alt-text
If the image is a crosspost from an OP, Provide the source.
Absolutely no right-wing jokes. This includes "Anarcho"-Capitalist concepts.
Absolutely no redfash jokes. This includes anything that props up the capitalist ruling classes pretending to be communists.
No bigotry whatsoever. See instance rules.
This is an anarchist comm. You don't have to be an anarchist to post, but you should at least understand what anarchism actually is. We're not here to educate you.
No shaming people for being anti-electoralism. This should be obvious from the above point but apparently we need to make it obvious to the turbolibs who can't control themselves. You have the rest of lemmy to moralize.
Join the matrix room for some real-time discussion.
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flippanarchy
@lemmy.dbzer0.com
2719
821
3775
Flippant Anarchism. A lighter take on social criticism with the aim of agitation.
Post humorous takes on capitalism and the states which prop it up. Memes, shitposting, screenshots of humorous good takes, discussions making fun of some reactionary online, it all works.
This community is anarchist-flavored. Reactionary takes won't be tolerated.
Don't take yourselves too seriously. Serious posts go to !anarchism@lemmy.dbzer0.com
Rules
If you post images with text, endeavour to provide the alt-text
If the image is a crosspost from an OP, Provide the source.
Absolutely no right-wing jokes. This includes "Anarcho"-Capitalist concepts.
Absolutely no redfash jokes. This includes anything that props up the capitalist ruling classes pretending to be communists.
No bigotry whatsoever. See instance rules.
This is an anarchist comm. You don't have to be an anarchist to post, but you should at least understand what anarchism actually is. We're not here to educate you.
No shaming people for being anti-electoralism. This should be obvious from the above point but apparently we need to make it obvious to the turbolibs who can't control themselves. You have the rest of lemmy to moralize.
Join the matrix room for some real-time discussion.
go to feed...
I'll take things that never happened for $500, Alex.
(still kinda funny)
save