Aside from the first part you don't actually need a wife to do most of that stuff. I could in theory constantly talk about a fictional wife I don't have and claim that she needed me for something so I could get out of awkward social situations.

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SpaceNoodle 20 points 4 months ago

It's easier to not need to lie.

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MrJameGumb 8 points 4 months ago

I disagree. I firmly believe that keeping track of a handful of lies about a fictional wife is considerably easier than actually being married.

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terranoid 9 points 4 months ago

I have to return some video tapes

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SpaceNoodle 5 points 4 months ago

This is why all of my girlfriends are mad at me

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bluGill 1 point 4 months ago

And in this case the odds that you are found out are rather high. I never approve of lies, but even chronic liers generally know better than a lie that will be found out.

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FlihpFlorp 12 points 4 months ago

But then say things like “you’re crazy” “you’re insane” and “sir please put down the gun”

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captain_oni 14 points 4 months ago

A picture of Maes Hughes holding up two pictures of his wife and daughter.

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DaddleDew 9 points 4 months ago

You can start doing most of these things right now. Just look at Lieutenant Columbo

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frustrated_phagocytosis 4 points 4 months ago

Mrs. Columbo existed though, she even had her own spinoff.

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DaddleDew 3 points 4 months ago

She didn't need to exist for most of that to work though

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agamemnonymous 7 points 4 months ago

Have wife, can confirm. It's great.

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AllNewTypeFace 3 points 4 months ago

A cat or dog of whom you have pictures and stories and whom you need to feed/walk/spend time with also works

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toynbee 1 point 4 months ago

Or you could be like Scully.

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Couplememes

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Couplememes

@sh.itjust.works

Community dedicated to memes that often hit a little too close to home. Respect the instance rules and remember that sharing these memes with your SO might 50/50 put you in the doghouse.

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