Never get into a traditional relationship. I've been in twenty four of them in my life and while I have had enjoyed feeling exclusive, feeling purpose and belonging. People don't often talk about the negatives of being in one.

Like, I've been in relationships where I was the only one working and the other didn't even try looking for work. There was little room for co-autonomy, where you have to feel like a part of you is pre-determined and predictable to make a relationship meet the compromises. I've had been in relationships where it felt one-sided.

And yeah it all could've been a matter of just winding up with the wrong partners, which is true. But it's exhausting finding the right person and I just can't simply be bothered. What I am up for, is finding partners I could just get close enough to but without the traditional nonsense. People who you could say are worth your time bonding with and they think you're worth their time bonding with and we can have the intimacy/affection as bonuses.

It's kinda like being at that line where it is like a relationship, but isn't at the same time. I think at my current stage in life, that's what I'd like to have. I don't want to ever again worry about who wants me to spend my money and how. I don't want to partake in drama where who I'm with gets back in touch with that long lost friend to find - oh - they're in love with eachother and want to be back together. Not like I'd know since that exact thing has happened a few times.

And I can do without marrying, I just don't think my life's design has marriage in the cards.