Seating arrangements

4 days ago by Track_Shovel to c/microblogmemes

Sergio 68 points 4 days ago

The best weddings are all "sinners", with maybe a table of normies huddled against the awesomeness.

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queerlilhayseed 36 points 4 days ago

The Sinners' Table is a fantastic name for it. I've heard it called it the Maybes or, less charitably, the Leftovers but this is way more accurate.

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waggz 12 points 3 days ago

i feel like leftovers is more the people who don't fit in with other people at all. I've heard the term undesirables apply here though

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queerlilhayseed 9 points 3 days ago

undesirables

lol yikes. The seating chart brings out a lot of brutal honesty in people. Or brutal passive aggression, in my case. The "leftovers" relative said they "just really didn't fit anywhere else" but made it clear that these people were only invited because they were doing an act of charity (that wasn't their decision anyway) and they "didn't judge, but some people just don't live Christian" 🙄

In spite of the planning committee it was a pretty fun wedding, and the Leftovers table was a big part of that. I got some cool weirdos in my bloodline.

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FrChazzz 31 points 3 days ago

I grew up Southern Baptist. A friend of mine got married to a marginally Catholic dude and the seating arrangement was that the Baptist-affiliated people were on one side of the room and the non-Baptist types on the other. There was a bar(wine and beer) and for those who don’t know, Southern Baptists have a pretty strong anti-alcohol stance.

My friend, the bride, sat me and my then-girlfriend with THE church lady. I grew up with this woman and she was the type to moralize and talk shit about everyone. So I’m like “I need a drink” and get up and cross the room to grab a beer for me and my girlfriend. I’m like the only person from the Baptist side to do this.

I sit back down and proceed to squeeze a lime into my Corona beer. Church lady pulls a full Sheila Broflowski “what what WHAT?!?” on me. “What is that?!” she asks with eyes super wide.

“This,” I say without looking at her as I squeeze my lime, “is a Corona with lime.”

Her draw is fully agape.

“Calm down, Debbie,” one of the cool-aunt types from my old church says, “he’s 21 and a beer is no big deal.”

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Alfredolin 2 points 3 days ago

What's the episcopal church's stance on that? :D

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ummthatguy 21 points 4 days ago

Reminds me of the wedding scene during the credits to The Birdcage where each side of the aisle is seated likewise.

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Duhtocqueville 19 points 4 days ago

I write to you all from the parents table.

It began lame as hell. I was a single man with a married brother who had a young child. I was clearly there to keep them company.

Later, there I was with my own child. At a table of people I didn’t know with children. Next to the goddamn speaker.

Then, I’m happy to report, I was at one of my favorite cousins weddings. I was there with her oldest brother and his child my kids age. And a bunch of other people with kids that age. And it was awesome. Finally.

I submit the best table at a wedding is one that you really fit in with. Whatever commonality that may be.

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psx_crab 16 points 3 days ago

have zero filter and know all the tea

If someone get introduced that way i would've totally ask if they just drink all the tea leaves.

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toynbee 4 points 3 days ago

Someone recently offered me the "inside baseball" and, though I looked it up and now know what it means, I still consider it a very odd phrase.

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Sv443 3 points 3 days ago

zero filter, 7 different french presses

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socsa 8 points 3 days ago

Oh damn this explains a lot actually.

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Lodespawn 6 points 4 days ago

I, my sister and 2 of my other cousins were much younger than all of my other cousins who were all about the same age. When my older cousins all started getting married my younger cousins and I would all get stuck at the kids table with a random friend or two of the married couple, the MC, the wedding DJ and the photographer.

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lightnsfw 4 points 3 days ago

I always was the random friend getting sat at the kids table lol.

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SkunkWorkz 5 points 3 days ago

Who is this dude? And why are his xits posted here so often?

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hansolo 5 points 3 days ago

I'm always at that table, and it's awesome. No pressure to perform, usually closer to the bar, no expectations about how many times you have to say "happy wife, happy life!" to someone already hungry, dehydrated, and buzzed.

Cmon, grandma! Let's dance the Lindy Hop and do some shots!

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Sergio 1 point 2 days ago

“happy wife, happy life!”

I have never heard that saying before. I had to hear it from hansolo at lemmy.today.

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hansolo 1 point 2 days ago

Once you hear it, it'll just start showing up.

Maybe 7 different people told me that when I got married.

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Sergio 1 point 2 days ago

Once you hear it, it’ll just start showing up.

oh gods is it like a curse? if so how do I get rid of it?

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hansolo 1 point 2 days ago

Amazing question! Yes, but also no.

2 of the grip of people that said it to me, said it like it was a curse. Like the only lesson they leaned in their whole damned lives was to treat their partner like a partner. Ruefully. Regretfully, they learned their ego wasn't enough, and admitted it in a moment when they needed to foist their greatest insight on a relative (or relative's kid's fiance), and that's just what spilled out of their arrogant Boomer mouths.

3 definitely said it like "this is actually the rule to know." An insight they shared neutrally. Well, one more like a 1000 yard stare.

One, and one alone, asked if I knew it. My spouse and I got married after 5+years together, so it was a fair question. I knew already.

It's more like a swear, to either the gods above or below. Take your pick.

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XiJinpingStanAccount 5 points 3 days ago

Personally if I knew someone and got invited to their wedding and I went and found they had decided all the gay people needed to be seperated from the rest of the group I'd just leave. Clearly that's not the type of person whose wedding I want to attend.

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CalypsoGirl 5 points 3 days ago

Is this really a thing, or just fun material for a fictional comedy story?

Otherwise why would a bride & groom invite people they don't like?

But if they DO like these people, why marginalize them?

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Nouvellalia 16 points 3 days ago
  • they're family
  • to keep the peace
  • to appear as a good person
  • "they're ok, just in small doses"

Just off the top of my head, these are the things I've heard.

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treesapx 6 points 3 days ago

What part of "this is the very best place to be" sounds like a bad thing?

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CalypsoGirl 3 points 3 days ago

Perhaps for those who are self-aware enough to understand their place in life and they have self-confidence but I on the other hand if I were put at the oddball table, which is probably where I'd belong, it would further reinforce my awareness that I'm an outcast & don't fit in with the normies, further take a toll on my fragile self-esteem and cause sorrow and further reinforce the reason why I prefer never to attend such events anyway haha

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Sergio 1 point 2 days ago

... reinforce my awareness that I’m an outcast & don’t fit in with the normies, further take a toll on my fragile self-esteem and cause sorrow ...

Welcome to the fediverse! We're all outcasts here. Rejoice with us!

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ricecake 5 points 3 days ago

Imagine you have some friends. You like them. No one else knows them. You've got an uncle you love because you've known him since childhood and he's sweet but he laughs really loud and you know most people don't appreciate him. You got any number of other people who you want to be at your wedding but you know that you can't put them next to ___ because it'll just be this whole thing.

So what do you do? You put them where they fit!

It's not about inviting people you don't like, or marginalizing people you do. It's about putting people who don't mind eating dinner together near each other.
It's not like the table is labeled, it's just that you can tell which one caught the "didn't fits". Sometimes it's as simple as "every table has someone, their partner, and their cousin/sibling/relative, and one table has the three single cousins who have 3 siblings, and a few random friends".

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explodicle 3 points 3 days ago

Why would Gordon Freeman lie to us

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Jankatarch 4 points 3 days ago

Best mostly due to the "several gay people" and "witchy aunt."

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kettuli 3 points 4 days ago

Thankfully I don’t get invited to weddings.

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groucho 3 points 3 days ago

Is that the table where you use the elegant tea candle centerpiece to melt the plasticware into alien artifacts? If so, can confirm.

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Flames5123 1 point 2 days ago

At our wedding, we had several online friends come that we met through the my little pony fandom. We sat them in the very far back corner of the venue, and they loved it! Kinda funny to hear that this is the norm, but it makes sense!

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JustPlainDave 1 point 3 days ago

Sounds like a good time to me.

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