I am a father of two. Wife was working today. It is very warm today, so I wanted to go swimming with my kids. My son was oke. My daughter also wanted to go, but she was on her period. She didn't want to go swimming in this situation. But for her it is also a very warm day. How can she find cooling? Any tips?
women of Lemmy, how do you find cooling when you're on your period?
3 days ago by abbadon420 to c/asklemmy
abbadon420 30 points 3 days ago
Sounds like solid advice, but my daughter is not comfortable with tampons (yet). She at least has had some icecream today. But so did my son and I haha
velma 20 points 3 days ago
Perfectly understandable if she's not comfy with tampons yet!
Then I'm going to second the advice of sitting at the edge of the pool with her feet in the water, spray bottles with water, damp compress on the back of her neck, shade/hats. Ice cream is good, too!!
JoeBigelow 5 points 3 days ago
Get the hose! Partially kidding, probably don't literally hose her down. Maybe get a lawn sprinkler or a slip n slide?
bobs_monkey 3 points 2 days ago
They have those portable misting bars that you hang up somewhere in the shade and hook up to a hose, they're great,
kindnesskills 20 points 3 days ago
Some companies have started selling period panties made for swimming, see if you can find some and maybe she can swim comfortably going forward.
There are other ways to play with water, like running through a water spreader, water balloons, water gun fight. She can do all of these with whatever her protection of choice is currently.
You can make popsicles by putting decarbonated soda or lemonade or juice (I like mine a bit watered down) in the freezer. Mini ones with icecube trays (and tooth picks?) or larger ones in trays bought specifically for the purpose (or home invented).
Staying in shade and having a fan for cooling off also helps, but isn't as fun. Going for a bike ride down a fairly flat and shaded park or forest trail could be more fun way to get some wind.
I_Fart_Glitter 9 points 3 days ago
There is a gas station near me that has a whole side of the store closed in as a massive walk in fridge for drinks. I like to go in and take a really long time choosing a beverage.
Period swim wear exists, but I don’t understand the physics of it or trust it enough to actually go in a pool, but it would be fine in a natural body of water that doesn’t have a white bottom to showcase any under water leaks. Or just for water play outside the pool- sprinklers, hoses, water balloons, etc.
laurathepluralized 2 points a day ago
I was just about to post a link to Knix as well! I haven't used their period swimsuits myself, but having used their period panties, I would certainly be willing to try! (I just dislike swimming in general, so don't have much need atm) The search results for their swimwear can even be filtered by absorbency.
And, of course, please tell the young lady that there are lots of women worldwide who can sympathize with how periods can make everyday things feel awkward. We've been there! She's absolutely not alone! ❤️
Arcanepotato 9 points 3 days ago
Do you know what part of swimming was uncomfortable for her? There is no universal rule about not swimming while bleeding, it's largely cultural or related to the type of product she wants to use (internal vs external). I think understanding what the restriction is will help you understand options.
A splash pad might be an option if she wants to use pads and therefore keep parts of her body dry. Wading pools, sitting on a dock with feet in the water, etc.
Other than that, anything that doesn't involve submerging the body would work:
- cold compress + fan
- cold fruits
- popsicles lol
AllNewTypeFace -49 points 3 days ago
Assuming that people who menstruate = women is somewhat short-sighted, particularly in the fediverse.
ProfessorScience 45 points 3 days ago
This sounds like getting offended just for the sake of getting offended. Surely there's some room for not requiring 100% precision at all times?
starlinguk -11 points 3 days ago
Since JKR's bullshit it has become increasingly important to get it right.
EggInDisguise -23 points 3 days ago
It's ignoring that an entire group of people exists, I'm so fucking sorry that attempting to be inclusive is somehow offensive to you.
When it's people of color, everyone loses their goddamn minds, but when it's trans people it's "okay to not be 100% perfect"
Fuck off with this closeted transphobia and admit you just don't care enough about Trans people to be precise.
Edit: if you're gonna comment another transphoobia supporting thing, just fuck off or admit you don't care about trans people and inclusivity, honestly just go to Twitter or whatever trump is on nowadays because you clearly belong there.
cattywampas 11 points 3 days ago
Would "females" be a better term? It's more accurate to be sure, but using the word "females" - in (American) English at least - has a weird connotation that I don't always like.
EggInDisguise -16 points 3 days ago
"people with vaginas" encompasses everyone regardless of sexual identity, gender assignment, or anything else really.
My spouse is non-binary, has a vagina. Two of my male best friends have vaginas, although one had a historectomy and no longer menstruates. A few other friends have vaginas although I'm not sure if they menstruate anymore. One is gender fluid and has a vagina.
"male/man female/woman" is gendered language, and insisting that only women have vaginas and menstruate is 100% just saying a whole group of people isn't important enough for consideration, and that is inherently transphobic.
And for the record, yes "female" has a weird connotation in the US because right wing weirdos and incels seem to be unable to say "women" and don't view women as people.
EggInDisguise -23 points 3 days ago
The language, like you, are ignoring transmascs.
Jessicat 12 points 3 days ago
It’s not designed to exclude anyone and certainly not in mean spirit. I think you would be hard pressed to find many trans people who would find this verbiage offensive. It’s literally a parent asking a group how to support their daughter. Why pick fights when none is happening?
Schlemmy 2 points 3 days ago
I don't know any trans people personally. I support trans rights. I could use non inclusive language because I fall back on the default in some unguarded moments. If anyone feels offended by my language I would apologise but I tend to get really defensive when attacked for a slip of the tongue.
I see what you mean but please be patient with us.
Wizard_Pope 16 points 3 days ago
Actually if you read this again it goes like this: women of lemmy = people that menstruate. Assuming that women menstruate is a normal assumption. And asking women how to deal with such issues is also perfectly normal and alright.
EggInDisguise -19 points 3 days ago
Normal ≠ okay
It was once normal to call black people by a slur.
It was once normal to backhand a woman for daring to speak around men.
Don't tell a marginalized group that they're overreacting for being marginalized and someone comes in and says "it's normal so shut up about it"
Wizard_Pope 16 points 3 days ago
You're just victimising yourself for no reason. The OP is just asking women because they usually have experience with this and is trying to help their daughter. Asking women for advice does not automatically exlude anyone with a vagina that does not identify as a woman.
Nothing about this post is marginalising anybody. Stop acting like a petulant child.
Also women might have experiences closer to those of OP's daughter than somevody else who did not always identify as a woman would have. It is a perfectly valid question in the sense of 'my daughter is having this specific issue -> how did other women deal with it at her age or even now'. None of this line of thinking is excluding the trans or being transphopbic or even anything in the vicinity of that.
Would you react the same way if a mom asked 'the men of lemmy' about a specific issue that her son is dealing with as a boy?
Jessicat 7 points 3 days ago
I agree with you. There are enough real trans issues out there without picking fights at innocent questions asked in good faith that are completely unrelated. Nowhere was there anything exclusionary in that post. If you look for negativity everywhere you’ll find it but you won’t make any friends and you probably won’t help your cause.
abbadon420 6 points 3 days ago
Nevermind, I shouldn't comment on this.
EggInDisguise -15 points 3 days ago
Menstruation is imherently female (binary)
Holy transphobia, batman, they've forgotten transmascs exist!
About 25% of my friends are men who menstruate.
cattywampas 8 points 3 days ago
You're conflating biological sex with gender identity. Not all females are women and not all women are females.
EggInDisguise -12 points 3 days ago
Read my other comments here, a large percentage of my friends are transmascs, no binaries, gender fluids, and varying between being capable of menstruating and not, while having vaginas.
I'm not conflating anything, thanks.
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asklemmy
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A Fediverse community for open-ended, thought provoking questions
Rules: (interactive)
1) Be nice and; have fun
Doxxing, trolling, sealioning, racism, toxicity and dog-whistling are not welcomed in AskLemmy. Remember what your mother said: if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. In addition, the site-wide Lemmy.world terms of service also apply here. Please familiarize yourself with them
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I just asked my wife who was a competitive swimmer and still swims often. Her response verbatim:
"I'd just wear a tampon or menstrual cup and still go swimming. I never even noticed it if I just shoved it far enough. Other than that, ice cream, but it has to have brownie chunks or it doesn't work."
Something tells me that last bit was more a hint for me though
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