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My wife was threatening to leave me because of my obsession with becoming a tailor.

3 years ago by Joe Klemmer to c/dadjokes

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I said, "Fine, suit yourself."

Hephoh2 19 points 3 years ago

Seems needle-ss to say that though

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path: 0 5154135, hotness: undefined, score: 19, children: 7
thomasloven 14 points 3 years ago

Seams so.

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path: 0 5154135 5154203, hotness: undefined, score: 14, children: 6
ObviouslyNotBanana 9 points 3 years ago

Your skills are indeed tailored for these puns

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path: 0 5154135 5154203 5154256, hotness: undefined, score: 9, children: 5
BrickTamland 9 points 3 years ago

I'm enjoying this thread

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path: 0 5154135 5154203 5154256 5154447, hotness: undefined, score: 9, children: 4
Pat_Riot 8 points 3 years ago

These puns are sew good I split a seam laughing.

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path: 0 5154135 5154203 5154256 5154447 5154600, hotness: undefined, score: 8, children: 3
udon 13 points 3 years ago

I guess your children will grow up in a patchwork family

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path: 0 5154664, hotness: undefined, score: 13, children: 0
Tylerdurdon 8 points 3 years ago

Mine said she was leaving because I had blown our savings on penis extensions.

She couldn't take it any longer.

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path: 0 5157067, hotness: undefined, score: 8, children: 2
BenadrylChunderHatch 7 points 3 years ago

Mine said she was leaving me because of my obsession with The Monkees. I didn't believe her at first, but then I saw her face.

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path: 0 5157067 5160066, hotness: undefined, score: 7, children: 1
workerONE 2 points 3 years ago

That's hilarious

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path: 0 5157067 5160066 5163740, hotness: undefined, score: 2, children: 0
cool_remains_icy 5 points 3 years ago

Mine threw me out for doing bad Arnold Schwarzenegger impressions. When I left, I said “I will return”.

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path: 0 5161381, hotness: undefined, score: 5, children: 0
speaker_hat 5 points 3 years ago

Mine left because of my brand new noise cancelling headphones.

She mumbled something vague like "you never listen to me", I didn't quite hear it tbh.

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path: 0 5162792, hotness: undefined, score: 5, children: 0
speaker_hat 2 points 3 years ago

Mine was because of my obsession to fish.

I said, "So long, and thanks for all the fish."

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path: 0 5162753, hotness: undefined, score: 2, children: 0
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