cross rule

2 days ago by Sheridan to c/onehundredninetysix

Almacca 60 points 2 days ago

"Jesus take the wheel!"

I don't think he even has a driving licence.

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Someonelol 35 points 2 days ago

Got it revoked for DUI probably. His BAC is the same as wine.

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Kenny2999 13 points 2 days ago

If he drove his car into a lake, would it float or would he just burst thru the roof like a bond villain?

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SeductiveTortoise 3 points 2 days ago

I can't decide what I would like more.

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Untamed_Star 2 points a day ago

talking about that, how didn't he fall walking in the water, weren't there little waves and all that?

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Kenny2999 3 points a day ago

Maybe he was also a surfer dude, I mean that gnarly hair and lack of job..

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Untamed_Star 1 point a day ago

car would crash into the lake

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Berengaria_of_Navarre 3 points 2 days ago

Lol

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Spezi 11 points 2 days ago

turns coolant into wine

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doomchapel666 3 points 2 days ago

hell yeah jesus now make my gas infinite too

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Spezi 4 points 2 days ago

gives you lactose intolerance and turns your gastric juice into milk

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yogurtwrong 4 points 21 hours ago

Of course he has a drivers licence, he drove a Honda Accord

1000001502

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Obi 1 point 14 hours ago

How amazing would it be if this was a real ad by Honda.

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Almacca -1 points 19 hours ago

If I had one of them I wouldn't speak of it either.

Edit: Oof. We've got some Accord owners in the audience. Just riffin', kids.

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s 40 points 2 days ago

Yeah but compare their driving record to atheists’ driving record. How often do you see nothing sitting by the side of the road?

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Eheran 3 points 2 days ago

Good point! Take that atheists!

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BurgerBaron 27 points 2 days ago

According to the county I live in, if you graffiti a highway train bridge with images of Jesus it's fine for a decade to leave that up until someone adds little red devil horns, then it gets painted over within a week.

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explodicle 8 points a day ago

That's why if the city won't fix the pothole, you should spray paint a dick on it.

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FistingEnthusiast 27 points 2 days ago

They shouldn't wear seatbelts

Let them put their faith to the test

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Tzayad 33 points 2 days ago

On a serious note.

I knew a woman who would not wear a seatbelt, her reasoning? If she wore one, it would signal to god that she didn't trust him.

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AbsolutelyClawless 14 points 2 days ago

I saw a video where daughters were arguing with their mother about turning the car off while it was being fueled. She refused to because "do you not trust Jesus? If we die, it is God's will. I trust him and will not interfere". Dangerous morons.

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cmbabul 13 points 2 days ago

Did… did you know my mom? She’s literally bitched my entire life about how she shouldn’t have to wear one if she doesn’t want to and that if she died in an accident she would “go on to glory”, it took my baby brother balling his eyes out that he didn’t want her to die to get her to do it. I still have doubts that she wears one if she’s in the car by herself. For context I’m now in my 40s

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rumschlumpel 5 points a day ago

Damn, literal death cult.

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FistingEnthusiast 10 points 2 days ago

There's stupid, then there's religious stupid...

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Beangut 9 points 2 days ago

That's cool, did you use 'knew' as in before she flew out a windscreen?

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Tollana1234567 2 points a day ago

does she believe in airbags.

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ChaoticNeutralCzech 23 points 2 days ago

I know it's a meme but... victims of car crashes are not just bad drivers

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i_ben_fine 8 points 2 days ago

atheists keep running christians off the road!

there we go, back in meme town

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Eheran 2 points 2 days ago

You know it's a meme so why write the comment?

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Whats_your_reasoning 1 point 19 hours ago

Perhaps their chaotic neutrality couldn’t resist?

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LORDSMEGMA 21 points 2 days ago

Well, cars weren't around in Jesus' time. No idea why they keep asking him to drive

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Berengaria_of_Navarre 20 points 2 days ago

Atheist: shit, I'm sliding out! Better get this under control.

Christian: Jesus, take the wheel!

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seathru 17 points 2 days ago

Yes. I've been on motorcycles the better part of my life and I give any vehicles with religious stickers a wide berth.

College alumni stickers are also an excellent bad driver indicator.

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finalarbiter 4 points 2 days ago

Interesting, is it any college alumni stickers or are there specific schools that you notice seem to correlate with bad drivers?

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alapakala 15 points 2 days ago

Blame the vehicle industry.
A good Christian rides camels, horses, and multiple wifes.

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LodeMike 6 points 2 days ago

Ride... the wives?

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Berengaria_of_Navarre 8 points 2 days ago

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dylanTheDeveloper 1 point a day ago

How would a centaur wear pants

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Berengaria_of_Navarre 4 points a day ago

You want Leah to wear clothes?

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Redditmodstouchgrass 3 points 2 days ago

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alapakala 2 points 2 days ago path: 0 25352371 25354211 25354572, hotness: undefined, score: 2, children: 2
LodeMike 3 points 2 days ago

I know what a harem is. I was just making a joke about riding wives like animals vs sexually.

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alapakala 3 points 2 days ago
yes

Awareness ≢ endorsement.
I love consentual poly{gamy,eros} & promiscuity.
I am incompatibility with such an objectifying grooming dominant religion.
Free all✊🏿

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Redditmodstouchgrass 1 point 2 days ago
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CPMSP 8 points 2 days ago

It's the perfect religion for being an utter psychopath.

No matter what, you're forgiven if you believe some Palestinian dude a couple thousand years ago is the only son of a supreme deity.

It's such a dovetail with capitalism it's criminal; be horrible, go to the good afterlife anyway‽

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expatriado 6 points 2 days ago

as a kid used to get in competitions on who would spot more of these crosses during road trips, we got lots of mountain serpentines, thus many of these near cliffs

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Etterra 5 points a day ago

Personally I think these little roadside shrines are ghoulish as hell.

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DragonTypeWyvern -15 points 2 days ago

... Kinda crazy that a community so dedicated to woke scolding only has one comment that plenty of those are for victims.

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astropenguin5 16 points 2 days ago

I may be too hopeful but I assume it's cuz everyone is smart enough to understand the joke and that it's not actually making fun of the victims

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DragonTypeWyvern -9 points 2 days ago

Sure bro, that's why everyone else is competing to be as cruel and bigoted as they can.

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