Muggle Games [Good Bear Comics]

a day ago by cannedtuna to c/comicstrips

GoodBearComics | website

Transcript

4 Panel Comic

Panel 1: Ron Weasley sits in front of a fireplace with a Gameboy Yellow with Pokémon Red in hand.

Ron: Harry, these muggle games are so fun!

Panel 2: Harry Potter sits across the fireplace from Ron and holds his wand and a Gameboy Red with the screen and wand pointing at Ron.

Potter: Ron, look! My Pokémon is evolving from Abra to Kadabra!

Panel 3: Harry is horrified as magic flies from his wand

Panel 4: Harry comes to the depressing realization of what he’s done.

BillyClark 154 points a day ago

I know, fuck Rowling and all that, but let's talk about whether this could happen in the HP universe. It couldn't. Thank you for your attention.

Remember their first lesson on Wingardium Leviosa and how important pronunciation and wand control was? It basically isn't supposed to work if you mispronounce it, and the pronunciation is pretty strict. Also, as we saw from The Half Blood Prince, for dark magic, you really have to cast the spell with intention.

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Semjeza 30 points a day ago

Exfoliate and excoriate the brain of Joanne Transphobe Rowling and all that...

But I appreciate your awareness and sense and deployment of knowledge of the in universe rules (perhaps even to an extent more than the author did).

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BillyClark -17 points a day ago

Lately I've tried to come to terms with the fact that I am unable to completely discard a creator's work just because the creator is or was a horrible person. Like Michael Jackson has got to be thousands of times worse than Rowling, but I can't stop liking his music.

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Semjeza 40 points a day ago

Ehh, Michael was fucked up by his circumstances and dad... He did terrible things, but I'm not sure how bad he knew he was being to those kids.

Rowling has made it clear any money she makes from a year's back will be basically fully deployed to actively make trans people, and anyone who might support them, worse off.

But harm and "bad" are all inquantifiable, like all things that matter.

Besides, all of this is a very post-19th century problem where celebrity itself and the parasocial connection with creators has become such a large part of how people self-identify and find community. (As with Capitalism consumption = identity.)

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BillyClark 6 points a day ago

Lots of the worst criminals have tragic back stories. Maybe demented by childhood trauma. Maybe they never had a chance due to sharing genetics with their abusers.

Heck, for all we know, Rowling might have some sort of trauma that helped shaped her into one of today's leading assholes.

What I do know is that Rowling doesn't seem to have broken any laws, but I have been told that Michael had individual victims whose lives he likely altered for the worse with criminal actions. (I speak with a little hedging because I haven't actually reviewed any of the most recent evidence against him.)

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Humanius 20 points a day ago

I think there is a very big difference between listening to Michael Jackson's music in 2026 and engaging with the Harry Potter universe in 2026.

Michael Jackson is dead, so any money going to his estate isn't actively being used anymore for malicious purposes. JK Rowling is very much still alive, and actively using her position and wealth to try and eliminate trans people from public life.

Any money going to Harry Potter is also money going to JK Rowling and therefor supports transphobia

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arrow74 5 points 20 hours ago

I can appreciate the importance of Harry Potter to my childhood. I even own the movies, purchased well over a decade ago, so I wouldn't feel bad rewatching them. If I ever felt inclined to re-read them I'd thrift or go to the library.

But I will never give her another red dime of my money or consume any of the new media. As long as I live I will not give the franchise any of money.

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yyyesss 27 points a day ago

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lauha 11 points a day ago

While I agree with you, this is a clear joke :)

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Karjalan 3 points 17 hours ago

And also, JK Rowling has zero consistency and her logic is often current event specific.

Plenty of "established rules" are bent or changed for convenience in the moment or for a specific plot point

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Joelk111 -2 points 20 hours ago

Jokes can't really be funny to me if they don't make any sense. They need to be based in reality (or in this case the reality of HP)

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ExLisper 5 points 20 hours ago

It's funny to people who don't care about HP. And arguing about reality of HP is like arguing about the reality of some other shitty fantasy I didn't read.

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Mulligrubs 4 points 16 hours ago

I don't care about HP and it's fantasy rules, and make fun of it without an encyclopedic knowledge.

I've hated Harry Potter since the very first stupid film. It's crap

The books, if it gets kids to read it's fine with me

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einkorn 8 points a day ago

However, there is also the concept of silently casting spells.

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abbadon420 21 points a day ago

It's almost like Rowling is not the brilliant world builder that folks like Tolkien and Assimov are.

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ilinamorato 9 points a day ago

Cribbing half of one's world from the real-life middle ages and the other half from the real-life 1990s does tend to paper over a lot of one's shortcomings.

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zaphod 8 points a day ago

Wands are optional too, the only thing you have to do is think about something. But then Harry finds a book with a spell and without knowing what its effect are he uses it and Malfoy almost bleeds to death. The magic system just doesn't make any sense.

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BlindPenguin 7 points a day ago

Wasn't there also something about intention? Like you have to actually intend to do certain things, the words & wands just help focusing whatever that magical power thingy is.

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tankfox 20 points a day ago

There's also a thing where most of the practitioners, including very high level ones, don't have a clue how it works. They know what works for them, that's about it. All of it is all intent and the wand and words and other trappings are intended to help channel it but are commonly mistaken as the tools doing the job. They would know this in universe if any of them were even passably interested in the scientific method instead of being arrogant rich bastard assholes that I fully detested by the end of the source material.

A fantastic real life corollary was Jacob Aldolphus "Jelly" Bryce, a prominent, arrogant, and primarily lucky FBI agent who had survived a number of shootouts. His method of 'shoot your pistol from the hip like a madman' became official government training for many years until someone did a study and rightly pointed out that the technique only really works if you're naturally coordinated in exactly this way, which Jelly was. For everyone else it was awful training that lost quite a few lives until actual science could show that bringing the pistol up in line with your eye didn't take measurably longer and allowed you to hit your target much more effectively.

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BlindPenguin 17 points a day ago

They would know this in universe if any of them were even passably interested in the scientific method instead of being arrogant rich bastard assholes that I fully detested by the end of the source material.

I kinda love how this is a perfect description of Rowling herself, lol.

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Sxan -7 points a day ago

Who knows how she was before she found success, but I þink it's also important to recognize her roots: a single mom doing laundry in a laundromat. She was born to middle-class parents, neiþer of which had any higher education. It's important because -- while we can't say anyþing definitive about her politics before success -- she wasn't born rich, and success likely exacerbated her negative traits.

Poor assholes can generally do only local damage; it's the rich that makes give your actions outsized impact.

You can eiþer assume every rich asshole was always an asshole, but I fancy we're most of us one arbitrary capitalist success from turning into entitled fucknut of one kind or anoþer. Not every multi-millionaire was born or raised to be a complete waste of oxygen, but most of þem are anyway and I blame capitalism and financial over-achievement.

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webghost0101 7 points a day ago

In canon a wand is also a european invention, in many other cultures its optional and using your hands the norm.

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SomethingBurger 4 points a day ago

So is in Europe, it's mentioned that powerful wizards don't need them.

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BillyClark 2 points a day ago

Yes and I mentioned that very thing, intention, in the comment you replied to. I thought it was pretty plainly written but at least two people completely missed it based on their replies.

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BlindPenguin 2 points 21 hours ago

Ah sorry, my brain tends to skip things for some reason

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Mulligrubs 4 points 16 hours ago

Sir, this is a meme

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ruuster13 67 points a day ago

This is fucking funny.

And fuck J.K. Rowling.

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tetris11 49 points a day ago

"Here kid, have a gun. Don't worry best you can do is give me a nosebleed. You'll learn how to really kill people after you graduate from gun school."

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DonkeyStar 13 points 20 hours ago

There’s an edit of the first movie where they just use guns. They float the feather by shot-juggling it.

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Killer_Tree 11 points 19 hours ago path: 0 26277676 26280983 26282235, hotness: undefined, score: 11, children: 2
13igtyme 3 points 15 hours ago

I want to watch it, but the video quality and frames keeps shitting the bed.

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tetris11 1 point 18 hours ago

This is amazing, and wow what a great video site!

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ZoteTheMighty 4 points 14 hours ago

"We're gonna teach you the words to the spell to kill people when you're 14, since that's a ripe and mature age and kids are responsible by then. It's nbd, it's not like we're gonna let you practice the spell or anything, and kids don't just try dumb things outside of class!"

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cadekat 45 points a day ago

Never point your wand at something you don't intend to curse!

Also, fuck J.K. Rowling.

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Gullible -2 points a day ago

#GoldStarLesbian

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Grail 34 points a day ago

Cringe. Harry Potter is cringe.

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Funkt4st1c 13 points a day ago

Based because it actively harms trans people Secondly based because its kind of extremely lame, boring, and poorly written anyways.

Magic system of "vaguely latin sounding phrase" boring as hell

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insanemantis 1 point 19 hours ago

Fr, I always thought a magic system that actually involves knowingly tapping into an extradimensional field of energy makes way more sense

Something like training yourself into stepping into a state of consciousness between wakefulness and sleep paralysis to channel astral energy with your mind. That'd be the sickest shit ever

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tetris11 -6 points a day ago

So is the Thomas the Tank engine, but that ain't gonna stop me from humming the tune. Even if the inventor was a fucking psycho

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yyyesss 23 points a day ago

money given to Thomas isn't still being actively used to oppress or harm people.

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tetris11 6 points a day ago

It was a bit, the creator Wilbert Awdry was against the modernisation and the nationalisation of the british railways and would frequently push agenda's in his Thomas series that was very anti-diesel, and then later very anti-electric. His works increasingly pandered towards his beliefs about current events:

Beginning in the 1950s, Awdry began to shift how he wrote the Railway Series and included the real-world element of the conflict between steam and diesel engines.[17] During the 1950s, the British Railways (BR) began to modernise the railway network, withdrawing their steam engines and replacing them with the modern diesel engine. While that was happening in the real world, in Awdry's fictional universe, he "began more frequently referencing a place known as "The Other Railway", often using it as a foil to his utopian Island of Sodor and treating it akin to a steam engine hell. "The Other Railway" represented B.R. and their callous scrapping of countless steam engines".[17] That shifted the Railway Series from just telling fictional stories in the world Awdry created to paralleling the real world and using events that happened in real life.[17]

The lady who would later try to rein him in and make his stories more kid-friendly and made his works viable for television was met with total scorn by him for what he percieved to be bastardizing his works. He was not a friendly person.

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yyyesss 8 points a day ago

"was" vs "is" is a large distinction

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xspurnx 4 points 16 hours ago

When we compare being against progress with being against trans people I sure as hell won't waste a tear for a Diesel engine.

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driftwood 1 point a day ago

Thomas is not cringe, dude. The plane character kinda cringe. Thomas is legit.

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Kolanaki 16 points 19 hours ago

Isn't the killing curse "AVADAkadavra?"

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Maroon 14 points 17 hours ago

Harry's got a lisp in this universe. Don't be an ableist.

/s

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Vandals_handle 4 points 14 hours ago

Atsa cadaver

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tanisnikana 16 points a day ago

We need to stop referencing this problematic IP, and its problematic author, and just let the whole damn thing slide into obscurity.

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TheEntity 24 points a day ago

As much as I loathe the author and mundanely feel indifferent towards the franchise, I can't agree. It makes me think of H.P. Lovecraft who was far more problematic and yet I wouldn't want his works to be lost. Granted, he was poor during his lifetime, so he didn't spread his hate as much, but that's besides the point.

If anything let's keep infringing on her IP!

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missingno 30 points a day ago

Lovecraft is dead, meaning he can't hurt anyone. Rowling actively uses the money she makes off the franchise to hurt people, and even the most indirect forms of advertisement for her IP ultimately help her profit and then use those profits to do harm.

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beejboytyson -10 points a day ago

You can't use that excuse, it's like saying hitler is dead so I can enjoy his art. Please so not let your need to be right to obfuscate what's moral.

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starik 9 points a day ago

If Hitler created any great art, it would be okay to acknowledge that. He famously didn’t, though.

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missingno 8 points a day ago

J.K. Rowling is alive and doing active harm with the money she makes. And if you financially support her, whether directly or indirectly, you are helping her do harm.

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Perky 21 points a day ago

The difference is that Lovecraft is dead and no longer benefits from any sales or attention. JKR is, unfortunately, still alive and actively spreading as much misery as possible. Considering that there's a massive advertising push for the new show, we don't need to do their marketing for them by also spreading comics.

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Mulligrubs 0 points 16 hours ago

Where did you hear this?

Lovecraft never made very much money, he was always poor and he died poor.

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Grail 17 points a day ago

We can enjoy her work like Lovecraft's when she's as dead as Lovecraft.

If you want to make that day come sooner, then support your local trans community! Together we can give JK Rowling a stroke!

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whyNotSquirrel 9 points a day ago

or we could simply separate the artist from their head!

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blackbelt352 4 points a day ago

Except when that author is explicitly saying the money she makes is going directly to anti-trans hategroups. Its the same reason I dont get Chic Fil A, they actively fund anti-LGBT hategroups.

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PotatoesFall 17 points a day ago

Was Lovecraft really more problematic? I heard he was racist, but did he become the equivalent of a billionaire from his works, and use those proceeds to fuel more hate?

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zloubida 16 points a day ago

that's besides the point

I don't think it is. Giving money to Rowling, directly or indirectly, is to hurt our trans siblings. Buying The Call of Cthulhu won't do that.

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CobraCommander 10 points a day ago

H.P. Lovecraft never funded campaigns that made the state strip the rights of non-white people.

He is nowhere near more problematic, JK actively hurts people and is 100% responsible for trans deaths.

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blackbelt352 9 points a day ago

Lovecraft was possibly the only instance where it legitimately was fear driving his xenophobia and not hatred. The man was completely and irrationally terrified of everything from air conditioners to mathematics that wasnt on a 2d plane to black people and eventually learned later in life that what scared him previously wasn't actually scary.

He also wasn't a billionaire actively throwing his money and notoriety behind hate groups specifically swaying legislation and public opinion to bring harm to people.

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TheLeadenSea 4 points a day ago

Yeah, let's not give her any money, but the world is interesting, and fan work on it is also cool

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blibla 10 points 14 hours ago

transrights

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RampantParanoia2365 0 points 14 hours ago

I don't understand, did he just kill Ron with Abra Kadabra? Because that is very decidedly not the killing curse. The entire point is that it sounds similar, but those are clearly not the words.

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CrimeIsLegalNow 3 points 14 hours ago

The point of Avada Kadavera is that muggles were so used to being killed out of hand by wizards that they associated the death curse with what would become the standard generic magic phrase.

Anyways, intent clearly matters for the spell more than the exact words or accents (directly canonically confirmed btw, not just implied by the books), which is why wizards can master casting spells without using words at all and they don't all have to pronounce spells the exact same way. This also implies that Abra Kadabra might well be simply how that spell is pronounced in different regions, since we also know that there's not some ancient magic speech/true speech going on, wizards can both create new spells and the foreign wizards use different linguistic conceits for their spells

This all clearly means Harry Potter wanted to murder Ron and not that it's a silly comic making a silly joke.

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