They don't like the rule

10 hours ago by rockSlayer to c/onehundredninetysix

churrodestroyer 92 points 10 hours ago

Until god admits he also gave me lactose intolerance he can fuck all the way off

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rockSlayer 35 points 10 hours ago

Nah, god just wanted you to suffer

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A_Union_of_Kobolds 17 points 10 hours ago

Expected behavior from the Demiurgos

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rumba 10 points 7 hours ago

He also gave us the science to fix it with gene therapy, but we won't for reasons.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J3FcbFqSoQY

I just skimmed the video again, and in the vein of being fair, he did revert to being intolerant over the period of 18 months and is considering changing it up and doing it again in the future. He can't just use the same virus, (he's now immune) and he'd need to change up how it's done so it doesn't fade when his intenstines schlough off over time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aoczYXJeMY4

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StumblingWasabi 6 points 7 hours ago

TIL

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VoteNixon2016 7 points 4 hours ago

A verdant, misty, mountain lake captioned with "God gives His toughest battles (a tummy ache) to His toughest warriors (me)

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Malica 81 points 9 hours ago

It's the nut milk that's weird, not interspecies breast milk.

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theuniqueone 27 points 9 hours ago

Exactly the most ridiculous argument I've ever heard.

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tyler 9 points 9 hours ago

I mean do you want to see human breast milk in stores?

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deadbeef79000 22 points 8 hours ago

At least the... uhh... vendors could consent.

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FatVegan 12 points 5 hours ago

How is it worse than force breeding another species, take their child away to steal their milk? I mean, i wouldn't drink human milk, but i don't find it so much worse from some other species.

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Cethin 11 points 4 hours ago

If you're appalled by the idea of human milk in stores, you need to reconsider why you find consuming milk from other animals to be acceptable. It's weird as fuck. Just because it's normalized doesn't make it not weird. It just means you don't think about it.

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tyler 2 points 3 hours ago

I don’t drink milk, I’m just asking if you want to see it in stores.

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Cethin 1 point 42 minutes ago

Personally, no, and I don't want to see animal milk in stores either. There are only two logically consistent answers to that and it's this one or the inverse; yes. I guess the yes could be two reasonable answers of "yes, and..." or "yes, but not animal milk."

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N0tTr0xy 9 points 7 hours ago

Yes, please.

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NathanRanch 1 point 4 hours ago

Formula?

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theuniqueone 70 points 9 hours ago

Much weirder to steal the breast milk from other living beings.

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Peppycito -10 points 9 hours ago

I'd say tofu is almost as strange as food gets.

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Evil_Incarnate 42 points 9 hours ago

Strange? It's just cheese made from soy milk.

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NewDark 4 points 7 hours ago

Oh so it's like paneer. Neat

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Evil_Incarnate 11 points 6 hours ago

I saw a documentary once, it went through all the different types of tofu, showed how they were made and all. From soft tofu to smoked and tofu skin.

It has many different varieties and uses. Yes like paneer, but also like cheddar, mozzarella and pastry.

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toomanypancakes 45 points 10 hours ago

Oats make better milk anyway

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emeralddawn45 15 points 7 hours ago

In terms of cost, environmental impact, and ease of making your own, yeah absolutely. In terms of flavor, it's almonds hands down.

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FernMD 4 points 4 hours ago

Soy all day every day, yo.

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SleepyPie 23 points 5 hours ago

Don’t have to non-consensually impregnate the almond and force it to stand in one spot hooked up to machinery against its will daily.

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commie -2 points 30 minutes ago

it's absurd to discuss consent from something that can't be informed. do you get consent from your sink before you put dirty dishes in it?

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Ioughttamow 3 points 25 minutes ago

You fuck your sink?

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commie 0 points 23 minutes ago

no but I put dirty dishes in it

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Hagdos 1 point 14 minutes ago

By that logic there's nothing wrong with pedophaelia or child labour either (as long as the kids are young enough to be unable to inform)

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commie 1 point 13 minutes ago

turns out, humans can be informed. and ethics are about how we treat other people.

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N0tTr0xy 15 points 9 hours ago

I offer to get milked. (We also can milk pretty much all mamals, pretty sure)

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AltheaHunter 17 points 9 hours ago

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tyler 10 points 9 hours ago

Yes yes in fact you can.

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pentastarm 14 points 9 hours ago

"I have nuts, Greg. Can you milk me?"

Wait...

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slacktoid 13 points 8 hours ago

This God is dumb cause this God yucks on people's yums

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Varesti 12 points 6 hours ago

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CobraCommander 7 points 6 hours ago

I can confirm this stuff is legit. I also have a great collection of shiny things now.

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Leviathan 12 points 3 hours ago

I used to work as a barista and whenever someone would make a snide remark when asked what kind of milk they wanted I'd agree and say I was a purist too, only Mommy's milk for me.

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manuremy 1 point 9 minutes ago

Man I wish the baristas here kept asking that question, I always forgot to ask for anything-other-than-dairy and then I get tummy aches. :c

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gigaqps 8 points 4 hours ago

Ironically almond milk was invented because God said people couldn't have animal milk during lent so they improvised.

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Samsy 8 points 7 hours ago

8 animals? Wtf?

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Chezus9247 7 points 7 hours ago

Yeah, sorry that I exist. I swear my milk is at least drinkable.

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drolex 6 points 4 hours ago

Cow, sheep, goat, horse, donkey, camel, yak, buffalo?

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Samsy 8 points 4 hours ago

How about:

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bertlewirth 2 points 3 hours ago

But I always drink my….malk??

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Slovene85 2 points 31 minutes ago

Bison, alpaca, llama?

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drolex 2 points 16 minutes ago

Can you milk a bison? Are they even domesticated? Bison milking sounds like an extreme sport on MTV in the 90's

I was not aware of llama and alpaca milk but it makes sense. Now looking for Inca cheese...

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onnekas 6 points 3 hours ago

Excuse me god (if you exist), you also gave us almonds.

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nonentity 5 points 35 minutes ago

Nut milk comes from male cows.

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Tikiporch 3 points 9 hours ago

I mix my Lactaid with Almond Breeze. Suck it, God.

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TankovayaDiviziya 1 point 8 minutes ago

Well god, if you hadn't make a huge chunk of population to be lactose intolerant, we wouldn't be looking for alternatives.

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