Strange woman here, anyone knows where I can buy swords in bulk, preferably with a pond thrown in? It's for... a personal project.

something something 'watery tart' something.

You know how to kill any party? Start quoting Monty Python.

The woman = Amy Coney Barrett

The pond = DC swamp

The sword = Official acts

That wasn't really a thing in medieval times. I'm afraid an axe will have to do.

This might fit in mediaeval times, with the earliest possible recorded use in the 13th century, but it's certainly not well-known until the early modern period and most famous right on the border between early and late modern.

And the billionaires will be the first to try it out!

Sic semper tyrranis

It goes Yah

y'all qaeda had those on Jan6. They can have 'em.

Samurai sword. But, probably they all have those as well.

Good news: take up subsistence farming, no healthcare, no electricity, and make everything yourself, and you too can have half the year "off".

Imagine a king fighting his own battle, wouldn't that be a sight...

they should also sport appropriate codpieces to match their raging egos

Hell yeah! Modern leaders are fucking cowards. Don't start a war if you're not going to fight in it yourself!

As somebody who lives in a kingdom, yes! Fucking parasites!

TIL that the US doesn't have apprenticeships. We have them over here in Australia, for the usual trades. But we also regulate a lot of those things - we're not allowed to handle our own electrical work if we're not trade qualified.

How does it work in the US, if a kid wants to become, say, a plumber?

Thats not medieval, thats everywhere exept the US of A.

Where I live, apprenticeships are officially regulated and for many proffessions you are not allowed to open a business without proper qualification.

Don't those already exist in union shops nowadays?

Wait, you don't it in the US ? Kids who aren't comfortable in school start learning a trade at 14, so by the time they're 18 they have some skills.

I get that it's a pitty that non everyone reads philosopher or learn about history and science, but on the other hands, some kids are really uncomortable at school, so having them working one week, and going to school one week is an alternative which pulls some student out of the failure cycle

guillotines are renaissance era.

I dunno, that was invented to make beheadings more humane...let's go back to an axe.

That's not cool man...

They said medieval, that is way too late.

Let's do an EU4 Dithmarschen world conquest run from here on out.

be the change you want to see in the world

Medieval peasant uprisings were inevitably put down and the perpetrators brutally massacred, and also their families.

The first successful uprisings weren't until the 1800s.

I have a cloak vendor bookmarked. I haven't pulled the trigger because I don't know if I wanna be the cloak guy, but dammit I want a cloak.

Medieval aesthetics also really had cloaks, but big detached hoods were more common.

Cloaks are actually quite historical, they're very easy to make and useful in a variety of conditions.

There's quite a community on reddit about bringing cloaks back: https://old.reddit.com/r/TheCapeRevolution/

Did you just insult the superior siege weapon?

As I understand it, the trebuchet is technically a catapult, I think you are trying to undermine it by referring to the lowly mangonel which is certainly inferior.

That sounds an awful lot like restaurants and jobs...

There was perpetual stew?

Inns like that existed during the enlightenment up through the invention of the railroad. In the medieval era you slept in a church or maybe someone's home.

This was one of the really interesting plot elements in World War Z, where towards the end of the war where they couldn't really afford to be wasting resources on prisons, they brought back corporal and public punishment. They'd put people in stockades to let the entire community know they were caught doing something like stealing their neighbor's firewood, or publicly lashing executives who were war-profiteering, and only imprisoning the absolute worst offenders who were incapable of integrating back into society.

For a silly zombie novel, it honestly has a phenomenal amount of prettt interesting social commentary, and is absolutely worth a listen to the unabridged audiobook.

Let's bring back paddlin' while we're at it

... And masochists? Please be specific.

I genuinely, honestly, 100% believe you should be able to option for physical punishment when being reprimanded for minor things. Pepper spray to the face, electric shock, mild caning, etc. Anything that would have little to no harm, even in the short term, but hurts like a bitch. I don't think you should be able to sentence someone to pain, but that the person being sentenced should be able to choose pain instead.

Nah you're spot on there. Trebuchets are absolutely mediaeval.

Guess that makes me king of my own domain! 😆

The last formal duel in the western hemisphere, occured in 1968. Pretty sure some lemming were already alive at this time, and most of us had parents alive at this time. It was between two french politicians after a heated argument at the parliament.

So it could come back quite quickly.

Benefit is that dueling was primarily done by rich white guys over issues of ego, so our tech CEOs would fit in just nicely whilst having the join benefit of removing half of them from the gene pool

I demand trial by combat!

A good melee never hurt anyone.

Can you still name a champion?

You think they used to mingle with commoners during an assault? They'd be up on the high ground.

I think the movie Braveheart gives a rather accurate representation of how warfare was in medieval times 🫣

nobility taking part in actual on-the-ground warfare.

Weren't Diana's kids as involved as they were allowed? Chopper pilots and medics and stuff?

That's what the "well-regulated militia" of the 2nd amendment was already supposed to be (give or take longbows vs. guns)

I’d volunteer for this. Fuck those French knights

Isn't that more of a renaissance thing

To be fair, quacks that claim to be able to do magical stuff are still around, some do quite well well for themselves even

Maybe a system where strange women lying in ponds distributing swords might actually be better

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) How many ass slices per person?

The medieval ice age sounded miserable though

Good luck having global trade with that.

Why would someone prefer that over money that can hold value over time? When I die I don't want my wife to have to jump through hoops.

Doesn't that already exist in parts of the US? I know the UK and Germany have it.

Taverns kind of are a thing, they're just called hotels now.

Insular industry groups with a monopoly on a certain craft or ability to perform a service? Big Tech is already fulfilling that role

Welcome to the internet.

Have a look around.

You seriously think they had more free time?

This has never been forbidden.

I'm not sure about trial by combat. White collar criminals can just pay for a champion to represent them, and if they had to represent themselves they could certainly afford to switch up their schedules a bit so as to be well-trained in combat.

I watched the Knights of Valor (full contact jousting troupe) perform at the Glengarry Renaissance Fair a month ago.

It was the most exciting sporting event I have ever seen. I want it normalised in arenas where the knights have sponsorships and good insurance.

Moats were cool until I learned that toileting holes were often positioned such that the urine and feces wash down into the moat. I'm gonna have to take a pass on that lazy river....

Yeah Christianity kinda got rid of that. Sorry.

Mugs! Love me some lead poisoning.

I’ve got two pewter tankards. It’s still great for English ale.

Trump already brought that one back.

Medieval?

i want to see gay guys duel to get gay guys

What are you talking about? Land taxes were one of, if not the, most important tax group in medieval times.

I’ve been to Medieval Times I know exactly what it means. Is say we bring back eating big drumsticks in public.

Kinda happened already, no?

Trebuchets aren't really a tool for defence. They have tremendous range and aren't exactly speedy to load, aim, and launch.

Unless you meant defence in the same way that a country's military operations are known as "defence forces" regardless of intent, in which case carry on.

I'm more for throwing tomatoes at ppl stuck with their arms and head in one of those thingies

Oh this one's coming, no doubt. Perhaps not in the same mode - it won't be a home to starve in. More like debt prison slavery