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This is unfair!

a year ago by The Picard Maneuver to c/lemmyshitpost

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eager_eagle 396 points a year ago

what is the charge?? Eating a meal? A succulent Chinese meal??

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Xanthrax 103 points a year ago

I see that you know your judo well.

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VerilyFemme 99 points a year ago

HANDS OFF MY PENIS

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baldingpudenda 33 points a year ago

The way he delivered that line was Oscar worthy.

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VerilyFemme 58 points a year ago

Truly, every line in the clip is delivered with the bravado and conviction of an experienced thespian.

"Gentlemen, this is democrrracy manifest!"

This is the bloke that got me on the penis befoaaa.

"Ooh, that's a nice headlock sir! Ahhh, yes, I see that you know your judo well."

"And you sir! Are you waiting to recieve my limp penis?"

This interview was three years ago. I sincerely hope he is in good health and has many more succulent meals in his future.

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Trainguyrom 3 points a year ago

Link for anyone like me who's one of today's lucky 10,000

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LegoBrickOnFire 3 points a year ago

I had never heard of Democracy Manifest before coming to lemmy. I am loving this subculture in strad of reddit's

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exasperation 190 points a year ago

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, do these sound like the actions of a man who had all he could eat?

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xkbx 24 points a year ago

Ah shit I fumbled the quote

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SpruceBringsteen 146 points a year ago

Maintain eye contact, eat the card. Let them know you want to make a scene.

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gravitas_deficiency 24 points a year ago

GET YOUR HANDS OFF OF MY PENIS

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barneypiccolo 9 points a year ago

"You got any more of these tasty notes? I haven't had all I can eat."

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Someonelol 123 points a year ago

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surph_ninja 29 points a year ago

Does this sound like a man who had all he could eat?!

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fulcrummed 118 points a year ago

And what happened after you were asked to leave?

We pretty much went straight home.

Mrs Simpson, let me remind you, you are under oath.

We drove around all night looking for another all you can eat fish buffet.

And when you couldn’t find one…?

We went fishing.

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limelight79 30 points a year ago

Does this sound like a man who had all he could eat?

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aeternum 11 points a year ago

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UltraGiGaGigantic 9 points a year ago

RIP Phil

Fuck Andy Dick

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kerrigan778 92 points a year ago

What is the crime? Eating a meal? A succulent Chinese meal?

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kofe 42 points a year ago

This. Is. Democracy. Manifest!

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Noite_Etion 18 points a year ago

Ahh yes, I see you know your Judo well... Good one.

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FinishingDutch 13 points a year ago

GET your HAND off my PENISSSSS!

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Iheartcheese 6 points a year ago

I'm trying to read this in any other voice but I can't

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xkbx 89 points a year ago

Does this look like a man who had… ALL he could eat?

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chiliedogg 14 points a year ago

"Sir, that is all you can eat for $15.99"

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shinratdr 81 points a year ago

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killea 65 points a year ago

I just wanna be called "sir" without it being followed by "you're making a scene."

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MrNesser 55 points a year ago

Jeez how much did you eat

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WanderingThoughts 46 points a year ago

A number of places have a time limit. It's all you can eat in 3 hours. There can be rules that you have to eat what you take, and when you take entire plates but barely touch them, the restaurant gets a bit annoyed.

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MrNesser 19 points a year ago

I've been in a few as well After 30 minutes I'm usually full out staying a 3 hour time limit and still eating......

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MelodiousFunk 22 points a year ago

There's a buffet place my spouse's friends were all gaga over. It was a bit of a drive so it took me a few years to actually agree to go. It was like $25 or $30 a person (but free if it's your birthday!) 15 years ago, so it's not like it was cheap. The first thing that struck me is how absolutely cavernous the place was. Like a Walmart filled with tables and food islands. Signs saying where to find certain types of food. That kind of thing.

I might have eaten $10 worth of food. And I have been known to pig out from time to time. But between the mediocre at best food and the "atmosphere"... yeah I had no plans on sticking around to try and get my money's worth.

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guy_threepwood 13 points a year ago

In the UK we have “JRC Global Buffet” which is almost exactly what you describe. It’s…not great. I went because, like you, some friends were particularly enamoured with the place for some reason.

I wasn’t a fan.

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cRazi_man 19 points a year ago

This note has a very "or else" vibe.

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aeronmelon 4 points a year ago

“We can do this the quiet way, or we can do this the loud way.”

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wreckedcarzz 2 points a year ago

leaves

drives car into restaurant

"you want to say sorry, motherfuckers?!"

grabs another plate of food

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Maalus 7 points a year ago

This note is a parody of an actual note that was about drinking in a bar.

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doingthestuff 2 points a year ago

Not all I could.

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Wilco 47 points a year ago

You been here FOUR HOUR! You go home now!

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renrenPDX 12 points a year ago

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LMurch 3 points a year ago

Is this the one where he goes, "it's all you can eat, not all YOU can eat. You scare my wife." That lives rent-free in my head.

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Wilco 1 point a year ago

LOL, so epic. They don't make comedy like that anymore.

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capt_wolf 24 points a year ago

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tigeruppercut 6 points a year ago

That's some 90s comedy right there

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crawancon 4 points a year ago

this was the first thing I thought of. nice to see a link already here. thanks!

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DoucheBagMcSwag 2 points a year ago

Damn I just saw this

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Kolanaki 23 points a year ago

I aspire to be like Dilbert's father and just live in a an all-you-can-eat buffet because if I never leave, I can eat forever.

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pyre 4 points a year ago

god that short lived series was hilarious. very unfortunate that the creator turned out to be a proper cunt.

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slaneesh_is_right 1 point a year ago

He always was a talentless cunt.

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rumba 18 points a year ago

My mother was 100 lbs soaking wet, but MAN could she eat. There was a steamed shrimp buffet on the other side of the city.

Family rules: We were there for shrimp, if you a little salad that's ok, but stay away from the bread and the desserts, you can get those anywhere. You'd best eat at least three plates full

We'd eat and eat and eat and eat, then take a little break, then eat some more. Mom was skinny; dad was normal-sized, and I was a little chubby. OMG did we put away some shrimp.

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Brotha_Jaufrey 15 points a year ago

Easy, just put a wig on and keep eating.

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rmuk 9 points a year ago

Wait until they're not looking to put on the wig. Otherwise it's kinda a bit weird.

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Brotha_Jaufrey 13 points a year ago

Assert your dominance, put the wig on while maintaining eye contact with the owner

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pyre 4 points a year ago

they're looking at each other like "wait, what card did you give him?"

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Thcdenton 14 points a year ago

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IndustryStandard 4 points a year ago

Unpopular opinion ai slop can be good

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answersplease77 2 points a year ago

what was this part of? did they reeact the whole thing?

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anachrohack 5 points a year ago

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curiousaur 11 points a year ago

We used to go to the buffet after practice. My teammates and I would be so hungry we could do three or four plates. We'd usually get there around 4, and while we were there they'd transition from lunch to dinner, which had different food and was more expensive, but we'd paid for lunch.

It was technically allowed, but because we were doing it consistently, and just eating so much, the manager came up to our table to have a talk with us about it. Didn't tell us to stop, but just tried to shame us. He said "I know what you're doing". We weren't doing it on purpose, we just came in hungry when practice ended.

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Lv_InSaNe_vL 6 points a year ago

Damn that's a shame. My team would also do this like once a month and the buffet we went to absolutely loved us. They would keep the party room open for us and prepare extra food the night before. Hell the owners came to some of the bigger meets too when they could.

Then someone drove a semi truck through the front of the building (nobody was hurt, it was overnight) and they never reopened :(

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curiousaur 2 points a year ago

I kinda get it, there was a pretty big difference between the lunch and dinner menu. The lunch was typical Chinese buffet, dinner had shrimp and crab legs and such. We just told him we'll stay away from the crab legs if we paid for lunch.

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IndustryStandard 1 point a year ago

ULPT moment

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ieatpwns 10 points a year ago

Democracy manifest!

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Itdidnttrickledown 9 points a year ago

Take the card with you make copies and dump them around the entrance to the restaurant. Do this for a while. Don't get caught. Its littering ya know.

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DoucheBagMcSwag 9 points a year ago

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DarrinBrunner 7 points a year ago

Oh. I'm making a scene. A scene covered in gravy, and a side of soft serve ice cream and sprinkles. Lots of sprinkles.

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Wetstew 7 points a year ago

I heard they shaved a gorilla.

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RememberTheApollo_ 7 points a year ago

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doingthestuff 7 points a year ago

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answersplease77 2 points a year ago

They could've sent a nicer waiter. And they did it to Joel Hansen the man himself; they lost on what could've been a $50 ad watched by millions!

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doingthestuff 2 points a year ago

Really people who don't treat him well have no idea what kind of potential nearly-free positive publicity they're missing out on. Just let the man eat!

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slaneesh_is_right 1 point a year ago

Humans are fucking disgusting

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nsrxn 6 points a year ago

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pseudolith 5 points a year ago

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HeyThisIsntTheYMCA 4 points a year ago



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moakley 4 points a year ago

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pineapplelover 3 points a year ago

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