Heaven [Sarah’s Scribbles]

4 months ago by cannedtuna to c/comicstrips

Transcript

Panel 1: [Sarah wearing white robes with small angel wings and a halo bends down to receive a spotted dog with little angel wings that runs at here. They stand on clouds]

Off screen: Welcome to Heaven! Here is your dog!

Panel 2: [Sarah pets the happy dog absently while looking up at the off screen speaker]

Sarah: Where’s my cat?

Panel 3: [Sarah stands, one hand still petting the dog as she looks around at all the different dogs in heaven.]

Sarah: Where’s ANY of the cats?

Panel 4: [Cats stand on their hind legs, holding paws, dance in a circle surrounded by the flames of hell]

Sarah’s Scribbles on Tumblr @sarahseeandersen on BlueSky

FoxyFerengi 96 points 4 months ago

I can't imagine my cat in hell. She's not even mischievous. Just wants sunlight and cuddles and nothing else lol

path: 0 24022808, hotness: undefined, score: 96, children: 4
Lost_My_Mind 22 points 4 months ago

Then you need a house with a sun room, where you cuddle her!

DO IT HUMAN SLAVE!!! SERVE YOUR KITTY!!!!

path: 0 24022808 24023877, hotness: undefined, score: 22, children: 0
pulsey 12 points 4 months ago

being lazy is a sin

path: 0 24022808 24024705, hotness: undefined, score: 12, children: 0
ZoteTheMighty 7 points 4 months ago

So you're saying your dog looked a lot like a cat?

path: 0 24022808 24025349, hotness: undefined, score: 7, children: 0
harambe69 3 points 4 months ago

Mine certainly has tortured and murdered enough critters to win a place next to Satan himself.

path: 0 24022808 24032439, hotness: undefined, score: 3, children: 0
its_kim_love 61 points 4 months ago

path: 0 24022857, hotness: undefined, score: 61, children: 1
LemmyFeed 8 points 4 months ago

I knew there was something I liked about cats.

path: 0 24022857 24025935, hotness: undefined, score: 8, children: 0
aeronmelon 28 points 4 months ago

Hell’s where the party is.

path: 0 24022692, hotness: undefined, score: 28, children: 4
CitizenKong 33 points 4 months ago

"Go to heaven for the weather, to hell for the company." Mark Twain.

path: 0 24022692 24022740, hotness: undefined, score: 33, children: 1
joroingo 2 points 4 months ago

So the dire straits were quoting Twain. Cool

path: 0 24022692 24022740 24031776, hotness: undefined, score: 2, children: 0
Texas_Hangover 8 points 4 months ago

Why go to heaven, where you have to constantly kiss your gods ass, when you can go to Valhalla! And drink with your Gods! SKAL!

path: 0 24022692 24025254, hotness: undefined, score: 8, children: 0
LuminousLuddite 2 points 4 months ago
path: 0 24022692 24025779, hotness: undefined, score: 2, children: 0
qwertyasdf 22 points 4 months ago
path: 0 24023345, hotness: undefined, score: 22, children: 0
samus12345 16 points 4 months ago

It's a funny joke that cats are assholes and dogs are good boys, but dogs are the subservient people-pleasers they are because we've bred them that way for the past 30,000 years. Cats are still only semi-domesticated after the 10,000 or so years we've been living with them. I suppose it fits with the "be subservient, go to Heaven, be independent, go to Hell" Christian narrative.

path: 0 24034207, hotness: undefined, score: 16, children: 2
echodot 11 points 4 months ago

Cats will never domesticated because they were already doing useful things for humans so there was never any need.

Dogs needed to be domesticated because the wild wolves they originated from kept trying to eat their handlers. Over time they were bred to be more docile. Presumably chihuahuas were an accident

path: 0 24034207 24034487, hotness: undefined, score: 11, children: 1
samus12345 11 points 4 months ago

Cats domesticated themselves just as much as they wanted and then stopped.

path: 0 24034207 24034487 24034833, hotness: undefined, score: 11, children: 0
FuglyDuck 14 points 4 months ago

God has a dubious understanding of consent, so this checks out.

path: 0 24022979, hotness: undefined, score: 14, children: 0
GhostFace 12 points 4 months ago

come here we have all the cats

path: 0 24027852, hotness: undefined, score: 12, children: 1
samus12345 4 points 4 months ago

path: 0 24027852 24034123, hotness: undefined, score: 4, children: 0
LovableSidekick 8 points 4 months ago

Scientists confirm, if humans vanished from the planet and cats remained, within six months every object on Earth would be knocked on the floor.

path: 0 24027650, hotness: undefined, score: 8, children: 0
yermaw 7 points 4 months ago

They work there, doing that thing where they knead your thighs with their claws and its juuuuuust tolerable enough to not push them off but still hurts like hell.

path: 0 24024350, hotness: undefined, score: 7, children: 1
FreeAZ 3 points 4 months ago

This is the biggest reason I'm a dog person. I've had dog bites break the skin and they still hurt less.

path: 0 24024350 24033941, hotness: undefined, score: 3, children: 0
Derpenheim 7 points 4 months ago

Whelp, I'll see them there

path: 0 24024450, hotness: undefined, score: 7, children: 0
AltheaHunter 6 points 4 months ago

meow :3

path: 0 24025465, hotness: undefined, score: 6, children: 0
ChicoSuave 5 points 4 months ago

I've only had one insidious darling of a cat. The others have been cuddle addicted fuzzy motors who don't even knock stuff off shelves. Two of them play fetch! Practically dogs.

path: 0 24024248, hotness: undefined, score: 5, children: 0
Tattorack 4 points 4 months ago

I wanna go where thr cats are! :V

path: 0 24035345, hotness: undefined, score: 4, children: 0
M137 4 points 4 months ago

There's definitely gonna be a lot more dogs than cats in hell. If we go by the rules of the bible, killing a human will make you go there and a lot more dogs kill humans than cats do.

path: 0 24024613, hotness: undefined, score: 4, children: 14
SmoothLiquidation 8 points 4 months ago

Doesn’t the bible say only humans have souls? all animals just die and go nowhere.

path: 0 24024613 24024757, hotness: undefined, score: 8, children: 12
backalleycoyote 19 points 4 months ago

Yeah, well, the Bible sucks. Odin literally has wolves chilling under the feasting table at Valhalla and Freya is a battle-crazy cat lady. If you like animals, find your way to Asgard. It’s also delightfully free of Christians!

path: 0 24024613 24024757 24025090, hotness: undefined, score: 19, children: 6
Rusty 4 points 4 months ago

The only problem is that you have to die in battle.

path: 0 24024613 24024757 24025090 24032344, hotness: undefined, score: 4, children: 5
Techranger 5 points 4 months ago

1037

path: 0 24024613 24024757 24025090 24032344 24033399, hotness: undefined, score: 5, children: 1
backalleycoyote 2 points 4 months ago

Yeah, and that’s my American bias showing. The potential I might die violently doing something as mundane as grocery shopping is a daily risk factor. The admission fee is low here so I forget there’s a lot of folks who don’t have an easy path to the halls of glory. But even without a violent death, you still get to chill in Hel’s domain with your ancestors, Garm the Hellhound is there, and only murderers and oath-breakers go to Niflhel to spend eternity being gnawed upon by dragons and serpents. Average people, flaws and all, get an average afterlife instead of eternal torment for minor transgressions like eating meat on a specific day or the blasphemy of being a woman and wearing pants.

path: 0 24024613 24024757 24025090 24032344 24033932, hotness: undefined, score: 2, children: 2
tyler 8 points 4 months ago

No, it doesn’t say that. Many Christians just interpret the Bible to mean whatever the fuck they want when they read it. No where does it say that.

path: 0 24024613 24024757 24025386, hotness: undefined, score: 8, children: 0
nexguy 4 points 4 months ago

I thought there was a GIANT farm upstate where they all go.... right?

RIGHT??1?

path: 0 24024613 24024757 24024834, hotness: undefined, score: 4, children: 1
limelight79 2 points 4 months ago

Absolutely!

path: 0 24024613 24024757 24024834 24034318, hotness: undefined, score: 2, children: 0
sundray 3 points 4 months ago

AFAIK, there's not direct mention of what happens to animals when they die, but many modern interpretations say that if Heaven is a paradise for humans, and if animal companionship makes humans happy, then there will be animals in Heaven.

Then again there are sects that believe that basically everyone in Heaven is brainwashed to be happy all the time just to be in God's presence, and that the only activity there is round-the-clock praise and singing, so animals don't really have a place there. Which is two kinds of shitty: what kind of "paradise" is no pets AND endless church?

path: 0 24024613 24024757 24027588, hotness: undefined, score: 3, children: 1
schipelblorp 3 points 4 months ago

Legit some Christians think Heaven will be Heaven because they will be enjoying watching the eternal torment of the sinners below.

path: 0 24024613 24024757 24027588 24032249, hotness: undefined, score: 3, children: 0
WhiskyTangoFoxtrot 1 point 4 months ago

Don Bluth says otherwise.

path: 0 24024613 24036205, hotness: undefined, score: 1, children: 0
DupaCycki 3 points 4 months ago

As a person living with cats my entire life... Yeah, absolutely deserved.

path: 0 24033636, hotness: undefined, score: 3, children: 0
SwissArmyKazoo 2 points 4 months ago

Now i wanna go to hell.

path: 0 24034060, hotness: undefined, score: 2, children: 0
ripcord 2 points 4 months ago

No, Tony is the bestest of boys

path: 0 24025331, hotness: undefined, score: 2, children: 0
AnnaFrankfurter 1 point 4 months ago
path: 0 24035775, hotness: undefined, score: 1, children: 0
comicstrips
comicstrips

@lemmy.world

login for more options
25781
8221
10259

Comic Strips is a community for those who love comic stories.

Rules
  1. *� Be Nice!

    • Treat others with respect and dignity. Friendly banter is okay, as long as it is mutual; keyword: friendly.
  2. *�️ Community Standards

    • Comics should be a full story, from start to finish, in one post.
    • Posts should be safe and enjoyable by the majority of community members, both here on lemmy.world and other instances.
    • Any comic that would qualify as raunchy, lewd, or otherwise draw unwanted attention by nosy coworkers, spouses, or family members should be tagged as NSFW.
    • Moderators have final say on what and what does not qualify as appropriate. Use common sense, and if need be, err on the side of caution.
  3. *� Keep it Real

    • Comics should be made and posted by real human beans, not by automated means like bots or AI. This is not the community for that sort of thing.
  4. *�️ Credit Where Credit is Due

    • Comics should include the original attribution to the artist(s) involved, and be unmodified. Bonus points if you include a link back to their website. When in doubt, use a reverse image search to try to find the original version. Repeat offenders will have their posts removed, be temporarily banned from posting, or if all else fails, be permanently banned from posting.
    • Attributions include, but are not limited to, watermarks, links, or other text or imagery that artists add to their comics to use for identification purposes. If you find a comic without any such markings, it would be a good idea to see if you can find an original version. If one cannot be found, say so and ask the community for help!
  5. *� Post Formatting

    • Post an image, gallery, or link to a specific comic hosted on another site; e.g., the author's website.
    • Meta posts about the community should be tagged with [Meta] either at the beginning or the end of the post title.
    • When linking to a comic hosted on another site, ensure the link is to the comic itself and not just to the website; e.g.,
      ✅ Correct: https://xkcd.com/386/
      ❌ Incorrect: https://xkcd.com/
  6. *� Post Frequency/SPAM

    • Each user (regardless of instance) may post up to five (5 🖐) comics a day. This can be any combination of personal comics you have written yourself, or other author's comics. Any comics exceeding five (5 🖐) will be removed.
  7. *�‍☠️ Internationalization (i18n)

    • Non-English posts are welcome. Please tag the post title with the original language, and include an English translation in the body of the post; e.g.,
      Sí, por favor [Spanish/Español]
  8. *� Moderation

    • We are human, just like most everybody else on Lemmy. If you feel a moderation decision was made in error, you are welcome to reach out to anybody on the moderation team for clarification. Keep in mind that moderation decisions may be final.
    • When reporting posts and/or comments, quote which rule is being broken, and why you feel it broke the rules.
Banned Artists

The following artists are banned from the community.

  1. Jago
  2. Stonetoss
  3. GPrime85

It should be noted that when you make reports, it is your responsibility to provide rational reasoning why something should be removed. Saying it simply breaks community rules is not always good enough.

Web Accessibility

Note: This is not a rule, but a helpful suggestion.

When posting images, you should strive to add alt-text for screen readers to use to describe the image you're posting:

Another helpful thing to do is to provide a transcription of the text in your images, as well as brief descriptions of what's going on. (example)

Web of Links
Other Comic Communities of Interest

go to feed...