Stitch rule

2 years ago by Track_Shovel to c/196

Duke_Nukem_1990 319 points 2 years ago

#womeninmalefields is describing common situations and phrases that women experience and turning them upside down by switching genders.

The analogy to this one would be a man telling a surgeon to surgically tighten a woman's vagina after giving birth. This is a common and disgusting joke.

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klemptor 279 points 2 years ago

Common and disgusting, but unfortunately not always a joke. You probably know this but for the benefit of others who may not be aware, the Husband Stitch is a real thing that used to be pretty commonly done regardless of what the woman wanted and often without her foreknowledge or consent. It's an extra stitch or two placed when sewing a woman back up after a vaginal tear or episiotomy during labor. The purpose is to make the woman "tighter" so her husband can still enjoy having sex with her even though she's given birth, which is staggeringly misogynistic and cruel. And it usually results in really painful sex for the woman because her vaginal opening is artificially small plus now it has inflexible scar tissue. It's a horrific thing to do to a woman, especially after giving birth.

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felykiosa 83 points 2 years ago

still enjoy having sex with her

If you need that to enjoy your partner you don't deserve them. That disgusting

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Duke_Nukem_1990 60 points 2 years ago

Thank you for providing additional information!

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chonglibloodsport 46 points 2 years ago

Another thing to note is that the episiotomy itself is no longer a recommended procedure for routine births. The incision lengthens recovery time and brings complications of its own.

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qyron 43 points 2 years ago

Unfortunately, medical violence is a thing and many professionals, even when saying the episiotomy is a decision for the woman, put it in such a way that the message conveyed is that the episiotomy makes giving birth easier and quicker. What is witheld is that it makes it easier for them.

Giving birth was turned into a surgical event, when it is only a phisiological one.

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Seleni 28 points 2 years ago

Speaking as someone who would have been stillborn if not for a C-section, there are some surgical procedures that are kind of important.

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Semi_Hemi_Demigod 12 points 2 years ago

Giving birth was turned into a surgical event, when it is only a phisiological one.

How can a woman give birth without the machine that goes PING?

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TheDoozer 9 points 2 years ago

I was under the impression it was forthe woman's benefit, that it is easier for a cut to heal than a tear. Is that not the case? Is the risk of tearing overblown?

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NielsBohron 20 points 2 years ago

I think you actually have that backward. In general, a jagged tear heals quicker than an incision because there is more surface area in contact between the two pieces, so a larger number of cells can be working to repair the tissue. That said, I'm not a doctor and it's been 10 years since my wife and I looked into this before our first kid, so I may be misremembering.

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user224 40 points 2 years ago

Yep, a useful comment. I had no idea about such a thing.

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latenightnoir 35 points 2 years ago

... Jesus fucking Christ...

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StopTouchingYourPhone 29 points 2 years ago

To add to your "for the benefit of others" explanation, this is also not a historical relic. It's still happening.

I work with refugees and a lot of women escaping fundie warzones are living with variations of this nightmare. So much mutilation, as little girls, preteens, post-giving-birth... Infections are common, tearing is common, and sex is torture. I've been doing this job long enough that I recognize the walk.

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uis 3 points 2 years ago

Unholy fuckery! This makes me glad to live in country, where to get an operation you need to visit 9001 doctors and get 100500 approvals.

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Lauchmelder 86 points 2 years ago

Jesus Christ, what kind of sick person comes up with stuff like that?

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valkyre09 115 points 2 years ago

After the mother gives birth to a healthy baby boy, the father leans to the doctor and whispers “how long until we can have sex?”. The doctor replies, “I clock off at 3.”

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CubbyTustard 30 points 2 years ago
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Luminocta 29 points 2 years ago

I worked for a man that thought it would be a funny thing to say soon after the delivery.

Look, I'm a guy. I laughed, until his (now ex) said that he actually said it.

I mean come on. It's funny as a joke, you don't ACTUALLY say that to a delivery nurse, my god.

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jaggedrobotpubes 8 points 2 years ago

Yeah, people who act like it could never be funny are insufferable and people who actually do it are psychos.

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ArcaneSlime 3 points 2 years ago

Middle ground wins again!

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Duke_Nukem_1990 17 points 2 years ago

Men 🤷🏻

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lud 16 points 2 years ago

Sick people that's who.

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Duke_Nukem_1990 8 points 2 years ago

Ok but in this case it's men, specifically. That is what the hashtag is about.

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captainlezbian 42 points 2 years ago

Not just a joke. It’s a thing that used to be more common but is still sometimes done.

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FindME 7 points 2 years ago

I had a doctor straight-faced tell an entire class of college students about it, and how it was a good thing. This was within the last 15 years. I would bet it is still far more common we'd want to imagine.

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SeekPie 38 points 2 years ago

Thanks for explaining it, wouldn't have understood it otherwise.

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ILikeBoobies 2 points 2 years ago

Thanks for explaining it

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Woht24 -14 points 2 years ago
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LANIK2000 70 points 2 years ago

Jesus christ, it feels like everyday I learn a new dreadful horror about American life. How the fuck have we not run out of these creepy facts yet? The country is soo fucked up, I swear to god... It's honestly hard to belive it's a real place, it didn't really sink in how much of a shit hole it is until I saw it my self... It's a twilight world where pain is a virtue for some reason.

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captainlezbian 9 points 2 years ago

Wait, was/is that only a thing here‽

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Cethin 19 points 2 years ago

Edit: misread. I thought you asked what this was about. Yeah, I'm sure it wasn't just here.

Men would sometimes have doctors add an extra stitch to women after childbirth to make them tighter. I think I've even heard sometimes doctors did it without concent of either party. Some women didn't even know it was done until they had complications and found out.

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DokPsy 13 points 2 years ago

It's called the husband stitch and it is exactly as horrid as it seems if not moreso. Hopefully a dying trend.

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phoenixz 8 points 2 years ago

Did I miss something here? I don't get it

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trashgirlfriend 14 points 2 years ago

You can look up the "husband stitch"

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RizzRustbolt 5 points 2 years ago

One of America's most popular songs is about eldritch gods living under the Appalachian Mountains.

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riwo 40 points 2 years ago

i dont get it :<

somewone pws explain the joke to me

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will_a113 61 points 2 years ago

Not sure if it was ever actually done or just urban legend but there used to be something called “the husband stitch” where an OBGYN would add another stitch while repairing an episiotomy (when a woman tears a bit giving childbirth) supposedly to make her vagina tighter. A lot of things there don’t add up, but that’s what the joke is about.

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yannic 100 points 2 years ago

Oh, it's real. This was offered for my sister-in-law.

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InEnduringGrowStrong 63 points 2 years ago

Not too long ago, this was also "offered" in the case of my sister.
The extra yucky part is it was offered to her husband without even her knowledge or consent.

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ChexMax 25 points 2 years ago

Husband stitch that doctor's mouth so they never make that suggestion again. Men should not be allowed near OB.

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will_a113 15 points 2 years ago

Yikes.

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Noel_Skum 30 points 2 years ago

Circumcision, fgm, the so-called husband stitch… wtf, people? If you’ve got genitals you’re happy with it seems a challenge just to keep them intact against the lunatics who want to chop and stitch. What is wrong with humans?

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unexposedhazard 16 points 2 years ago

Probably even more dangerous in the back tbh

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LovableSidekick 10 points 2 years ago

The adding "rule" makes anything cool rule.

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rollmagma -22 points 2 years ago

??? so he cannot defecate properly? I get the point, but this makes no sense.

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osaerisxero 81 points 2 years ago

To make him tighter when she pegs him, clearly

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InEnduringGrowStrong 52 points 2 years ago

It's to highlight something fucked up that's sometimes done on women after giving birth.

Quoting another comment in the thread:

the Husband Stitch is a real thing that used to be pretty commonly done regardless of what the woman wanted and often without her foreknowledge or consent. It’s an extra stitch or two placed when sewing a woman back up after a vaginal tear or episiotomy during labor. The purpose is to make the woman “tighter” so her husband can still enjoy having sex with her even though she’s given birth, which is staggeringly misogynistic and cruel. And it usually results in really painful sex for the woman because her vaginal opening is artificially small plus now it has inflexible scar tissue.

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rollmagma -20 points 2 years ago

Right, I'm just pointing out that it's a bad meme. I understand what this is about.

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Kalysta 13 points 2 years ago

The meme is fine. The point is this would never be done to a man, so it shouldn’t ever be done to a woman.

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rollmagma -8 points 2 years ago
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Tikiporch -87 points 2 years ago

Husband bad. Good old Boomer Humor.

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giantfloppycock 115 points 2 years ago

This isn’t boomer humor, it’s highlighting a misogynistic practice by flipping gender roles - pretty non-boomer imo.

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Tikiporch -65 points 2 years ago

Oh, right! It's only boomer humor if Wife Bad.

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Viking_Hippie 40 points 2 years ago

Way to fail at detecting sarcasm while being sarcastic 🤦

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Tikiporch -38 points 2 years ago

I'm devastated. Y'all really teaching me a lesson here.

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FabledAepitaph -3 points 2 years ago

For reals. I'm mid-30s and I only remember hearing about this when I was younger. I'd completely forgotten about it, and never would have asked for or suggested it happen.

Good job bringing it back to the forefront so misogynistic men can know of it and use it to torment a fresh, new generation of women.

If your partner jokes about having surgery done to you without your consent, just leave them--whether you're a man or a woman.

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