Great. Please refer to me as the god emperor omnissiah from now on. It'll be fine. Trust.

Guys

What? You mean it? I promise I won't do anything weird haha. All of my laws will be super normal and not involve any of my kinks haha. Y'all are so sweet 🥺. I am very normal and can be trusted with state power

It will definitely be different yes

People talk about Hitler, Stalin, Mao, and Pol Pot like they are monsters, but the truth is, they were just regular humans, they had feelings, mothers, ambitions, anxieties. They were just normal men. To call them monsters ignores the full range of human capabilities.

Now if if you want a truly monstrous dictator, and not one of these posers, vote for me.

first thing would be to roll out the Guillotine in front of anyone with a networth of more than 10 Million, and ask an Ultimatum: "Either your Money above 10 Million goes to the Community and Infrastructure or your Head." After it has been settled I would resign.

i unironically feel like I would be a better leader than who's currently in charge. hell, a literal naked molerat would probably do a better job

Absolutely fucking not unless you also make me omniscient so I know the best course of action.

Otherwise my ass is making my mother in charge of education, tell her to find some people who can help us, and then try to let those people who are experts do shit.

"if the sum of your possessions exceeds 100 M dollars/euros/whatever, your shall lose your civil rights, including the right to have your -shady- death investigated."

You're welcome. Invest in schools and hospitals. You have one week.

I promise I'll be benevolent dictator

FOSS on everyone. No large corporations. Almost everything produced locally. Cars only allowed in rural areas. Public transportation will be like this. No big cities, everyone will be spread into medium-sized ones. People will have houses, and every house will be obliged to have a tree in the front. People will only be allowed a max of two children, and we will have a degrowth economy where population itself will shrink slowly until the end of humanity.

No thanks. People don’t wield power, power wields people.

i dont trust myself enough .. to have such control over so many peeps.

right now i may think "mhm yes mayb i could do it" but mayb i change with power.

i wouldnt trust any individual peep with that...

I’m down:

• Single payer medical/dental/vision insurance
• Implement UBI
• Taxes based on a curve of net worth up to 100%
• Universal ranked choice voting
• Abolish my dictatorship

Might throw other things in there, but I think it’d be the shortest lived dictatorship in history.

It'll be different

Still bad, but different XD

We need someone strong of character and values, experienced but able to change, willing but not eager to take up the mantle of leadership, someone who knows that their duty is not to build the future themselves, but to empower others to do so and bring together their successes in one coherent vision.
What I'm saying is: Linus Torvalds for world governor!

Yes! A Ferrari, a prostitute (male or female) and a psychologist for every citizen. Also, wine on tap in every home.

You either get the joke or you don't.

I'd actually be a great leader because I know literally the only secret to good leadership (not great, but good): appoint people that are really really good at their jobs so you can do fuck all all day.

🌸Flowers for everyone💐🌸

A friend of mine literally said that he'll be a great leader and should not be questioned after throwing out all sorts of silly ideas on how to improve our city. I told him he'll be worse than the current government and this is why democracy is still the best, because it does not rely on a single point of failure: which is one leader making bad decisions after bad decisions. A good autocrat is only one in a million.

I'd be assassinated VERY quickly by the rich and powerful.

It'll be a prime example of "the road to hell is paved with good intentions". Can't imagine I'd be able to keep the country running well for more than a year tbh

I'll just use my dictatorship powers to replace it with liquid democracy!

I bet you'll hate that!

I will simply make all the cool stuff legal and all the icky stuff illegal

Now salute me (or don’t, I’m not your mom)

Dick tater chip

Actually it has always been my goal to become world dictator, so it's funny you say that :)

"Who's yuu? I'm Mii!"

So, we going to miniaturize every pony for every man, or not?

I would be willing to try it but honestly I'm too gullible to figure out who would actually do a good job at planning the next democratic government to succeed me.

If I become dictator, everyone is getting toxoplasmosis (so everyone can become more attractive than they are)

I'd do fine. Honestly, you'd all be a lot better off than with the current lot.

Affordable housing for everyone, queer accomodations (including transition, sport centres), federated and decentralised worker-owned co-ops being fostered, etc..

i mean, it wouldn't be a dictatorship for long tho, I'll just add a few things and give up my power.

On one hand not using it to limit the death penalty to billionaires and powerful politicians, to end the war on drugs, to bring ubi and universal healthcare is a loss. To give that up seems immoral.

Also to take the power seems immoral.

Not sure there's a good answer for a good person here.

Nah, it will be even worse.