Egg Rule

2 years ago by Rebels_Droppin to c/196

gibmiser 165 points 2 years ago

Who names their chicken Bessie? Everyone knows Bessie is a cow's name.

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Mandarbmax 88 points 2 years ago

You know that, I know that, but I don't think the chicken will question it.

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MammyWhammy 54 points 2 years ago

Henrietta is right there

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Mr_Blott 3 points 2 years ago

There's "Cock" too

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key 34 points 2 years ago

Cow eggs are much tastier than chicken eggs anyways.

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Viking_Hippie 12 points 2 years ago

I believe the proper term for cow eggs is "prairie oysters"..

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Bartsbigbugbag 2 points 2 years ago

Rocky Mountain oysters is what they call them in my neck of the woods.

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zarkanian 3 points 2 years ago

Just don't mess with a chicken cow. Those things are dangerous!

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myster0n 18 points 2 years ago

What if ... the chicken was adopted by a cow?

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humorlessrepost 8 points 2 years ago

And what if they were both brown?

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Viking_Hippie 8 points 2 years ago

How, now?

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Slovene 3 points 2 years ago

Dad was proud. He didn't care how.

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WeLoveCastingSpellz 10 points 2 years ago

fr

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bjoern_tantau 59 points 2 years ago

Suburbanite in a proper suburb: "Come child, walk with me to the corner store to pick up some eggs."

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LuckyBoy 49 points 2 years ago

I see that as the european version.

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bjoern_tantau 12 points 2 years ago

I was debating with myself if I should say that. But I thought I shouldn't exclude third world countries.

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TheBat 6 points 2 years ago
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variants 6 points 2 years ago

Or california, I've always lived near a corner store or next to a neighbor with chickens

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akilou 24 points 2 years ago path: 0 9059779 9061861, hotness: undefined, score: 24, children: 3
skyspydude1 8 points 2 years ago

This was definitely something I didn't realize was a thing until I moved into a far more non-car dependent suburb. I grew up in suburban sprawl so bad it would literally take you half an hour to foot just to leave the neighborhood. It's not nearly as good as some of the places I've stayed in Europe, but it was eye opening to say the least.

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PipedLinkBot 2 points 2 years ago path: 0 9059779 9061861 9061868, hotness: undefined, score: 2, children: 0
areyouevenreal 1 point 2 years ago

You should try an English suburb. The one I used to be in had a couple doctor's surgeries and everything. On a main road that leads into the city centre too.

The next one had a whole shopping centre just to itself.

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CaptDust 24 points 2 years ago

Stay close child, there is no sidewalk and car traffic is moving at 35mph

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RaoulDook 11 points 2 years ago

I'm in a rural town in the USA and I have all these options available. 5 minutes away from grocery stores and restaurants, fresh produce and eggs growing in my own backyard. Room for my kids and pets to roam and no HOA and even low amounts of traffic to deal with.

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Semi_Hemi_Demigod 9 points 2 years ago

My suburb is within walking distance of a big grocery store. I have a wagon I take with me for big orders. Sometimes I see a bunny.

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Winter8593 7 points 2 years ago

We don't get many of those in these parts 😞

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AnUnusualRelic 6 points 2 years ago

And that's the last anyone ever saw of them.

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Swedneck 2 points 2 years ago

streetcar suburb: "Come child, let us take the tram to the store and buy some eggs"

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barsoap 2 points 2 years ago

In a proper streetcar suburb there should be a supermarket at the tram stop. Also daycare and small primary school, a hair stylist, a GP office, and a restaurant/takeout. Parcel pickup. You only take the tram if you need to go somewhere that has a larger catchment area than a tram stop and especially the supermarket and takeout should be directly at the tram stop so that commuters can grab something on their way home, the rest can be a bit more distributed. One tram stop might have a clothing store, another a shoe store.

Have plenty of bike parking that doubles the radius for the catchment area. housing density should gradually fall off from the tram stop outwards, you can e.g. have a couple of 8-storey blocks around the tram stops with a quasi-urban feel surrounded by 3-5 storeys interspersed with football pitches and greenery and playgrounds, then terraced homes, then finally single-family homes. As to street design: Plenty of cul-de-sacs and traffic calming, make sure that the cul-de-sacs are only for cars, bikes can continue on (you don't need separate bike infrastructure in traffic-calmed areas), also plenty of small paths cutting through everything so kids can visit friends living away 100m without you having to get on a highway first.

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IsThisAnAI 58 points 2 years ago

Takes all of 5 minutes to start a car and drive a mile and back. Nobody walks into a Costco for just eggs or brings the entire family.

I get that you all hate cars but when you make up fantasy stories like this you just harden mind of those you must convince.

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Sekoia 91 points 2 years ago

There's no reason you should need to drive for that kind of stuff. Sure, it takes 5 minutes, but it's worse for your health, the environment, your wallet, and your morale.

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IsThisAnAI 14 points 2 years ago

I never said you should. Only that the above in no way describes the majority experience. It's really not that stressful in the least bit. It's a 10 minute experience with an extra wide parking spot for your f150 at one of the dozens of choices you'll have to grab your eggs.

I am particularly lucky in that I could go to Wegmans or one of several farms within that 10 minute time frame.

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EldritchFeminity 14 points 2 years ago

It's far closer to my hometown experience than what you describe.

I know of 2 grocery stores there (the other half of that town is a mystery to me, probably a couple more there but it was 10 minutes just to get over the bridge, 40+ minutes in the summer, so I never went there), and they got their first supermarket in a decade about 5 years ago now, after the previous one closed 10 years before. For a town of 30,000.

Granted, it's a summer vacation town, so it's like 60% rich people's summer homes, but everybody I've talked to who's lived in a summer town has described more or less the same experiences that I had growing up.

When I lived there, it was a 5-7 minute drive to the closest grocery, where you could pay tourist prices, or 20 minutes to that new supermarket. Your other option was to drive to the next town over or 30 minutes by highway in the other direction.

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jivandabeast 9 points 2 years ago

Caught the Upstate NY-er

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IsThisAnAI 0 points 2 years ago

No banana.

Edit: just realized none of you know that Wegmans goes into VA, NJ, NY, and PA.

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boonhet 2 points 2 years ago

I visited the US once for a week. Visited Walmart exactly once, and Wegmans every other time. Wegmans blows even my European expectations for a grocery store out of the water.

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IsThisAnAI 2 points 2 years ago

They are pricy but my wife is celiac and they take their allergen labeling very seriously and importantly consistently. It's so easy to find GF on the labels for canned goods and such.

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shasta 3 points 2 years ago

Sure, and a suburbanite could bike 10-15 minutes there instead of driving. This isn't really a problem with suburbs. Grocery stores are incredibly common there, probably moreso than urban areas.

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EldritchFeminity 13 points 2 years ago

Unless you live in the US with its Euclidean Zoning laws which prohibit mixing land use types in a lot of the country. Groceries are commercial use, and so have to go in commercial developments. Plus the big box stores have killed off most of the small grocers, so you have to go to the strip mall on the edge of town.

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daltotron 10 points 2 years ago

This. Have no clue where these people are living, probably in proximity to a larger city, but everywhere I've ever lived (mostly smalltown shitsville suburban america), your options are maybe a corner store that has your bare essentials, at an insane markup (mostly, I suspect, in order to exploit people who don't own a car, forgot something on their way to the grocery, whatever. Capitalize on proximity.), or like, a 20 minute drive to the grocery store. 20 minutes both ways, plus the time you spend in the store, and parking, and traffic. That's probably like an hour out of your day, at the least. Probably more, since you're usually getting all your week's worth of groceries at once, since you wanna minmax your time.

Being in a commercial district and not an industrial one, and, being as most people drive their cars everywhere, and everything tends to be spread out to meet parking minimums, you probably don't end up close enough to the grocery store to pick up stuff on your way back from most of the other things you're gonna be doing. It all leads to more dedicated trips where you want to plan out more thoroughly what you're buying and what you're eating through the whole week, there's not a lot of spontaneity there. Even plan out what you're doing for fun, which I think is kind of antithetical to the idea of having fun.

I have never lived in a place where all of this wasn't the case.

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samus12345 4 points 2 years ago

Yeah, turns out people keep needing food every day, so it makes a lot of sense to have places selling it close to where they live.

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Crashumbc 1 point 2 years ago

And every gas station has eggs now.

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Exec 21 points 2 years ago

Drive, a mile? To a whole hypermarket for eggs? I'd just walk down the 95 meters to the grocery store here to get those missing eggs

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IsThisAnAI 14 points 2 years ago

Okay, that's still a similar effort. And I don't disagree the preferred approach. The above is absurd though. If anything it describes a more rural experience and still quite exaggerated IMO.

The above is fantasy circle jerk material. Meme better and have a basis of truth. Those are the best memes.

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Exec 12 points 2 years ago

If I didn't have to dox myself for that I'd gladly go out and record my way to the store. Just because you can't have basic necessities over there across the pond it doesn't mean everyone is going out of their way to lie for magic internet points.

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IsThisAnAI 2 points 2 years ago

Lolol this clearly describes America. You are just rife with salt because you can't accept reality apparently.

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boonhet 3 points 2 years ago

Honestly? Walking 95 meters to the grocery store is way less effort than getting in the car, putting on your seat belt, starting the car, driving off, and parking.

I lived 300 meters from a small grocery store and a 5 minute drive from a bigger one. I almost never went to the bigger one even though it had a better selection of food.

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IsThisAnAI 2 points 2 years ago

Maybe 🤷‍♂️

Is it anywhere near the description above?

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mister_flibble 2 points 2 years ago

Yeah, realistically this hypothetical person just grabbed eggs while they were at the Wawa. Nobody goes on a whole ass Costco run when they were already making dinner just for fucking eggs.

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TheBat 3 points 2 years ago
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inverted_deflector 2 points 2 years ago

Yeah I agree that car dependent suburbs are a problem and car brainedness is an issue in North America, but these fake stories are kind of laughable.

Ive lived in suburbs and cities all over NY state and this story is funny. I'd probably be able to get to like 3 or 4 regional groceries (not cosco) in 5-10 minutes or to a gas station with good prices on eggs and milk in 2-5 minutes. Ive been to orlando so I know the OP isnt entirely untrue, but Ive lived in plenty of places where I'd be there and back again before the city guy gets to the bottom of the elevator/stairs. Also the corner bodega is almost definitely going to be more expensive.

Again I agree car dependency is bad, but this whole thing is silly.

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samus12345 34 points 2 years ago path: 0 9065322, hotness: undefined, score: 34, children: 1
melpomenesclevage 2 points 2 years ago

Same!

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shani66 26 points 2 years ago

Suburbs should not exist. I get Urban, i get rural, but there is absolutely nothing justifying suburban.

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homesnatch 15 points 2 years ago

When rural community populations increase, should we advocate for euthanasia or forced relocation?

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melpomenesclevage 9 points 2 years ago

That's not how suburbs happen. That's how small towns happen. Not the same thing. Small towns can be cool.

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homesnatch 2 points 2 years ago

Small towns can eventually turn into suburbs... In my area, most suburbs were founded in the 1600's, later became incorporated into a town, and later into a city. It's proximity to a major nearby city makes it a suburb.

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chiliedogg 12 points 2 years ago

Living within 30 minutes of my job in the city costs $3,000/month in rent for a 800sf apartment. Living within walking distance would cost $4,000 if I could even find anything to rent.

Living an hour away costs $750/month in rent for a 1200sf trailer. My car note is $450/month and I spend about $300/month on gasoline on average. All in my rent, vehicle, and gas is half the cost of just the rent in the city.

Yeah - there's an extra hour lost every day to the drive, but the savings comes out to around $75/hr for that commute. And I have the freedom to travel anywhere I want with my vehicle on top of that.

So yeah, I live suburban and fuck anyone who criticizes me for making that sensible economic decision.

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Crashumbc 25 points 2 years ago

I don't criticize you at all.

But that is a urban planning problem. Because they didn't build enough housing and public transportation.

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melpomenesclevage 7 points 2 years ago

Nobody's saying 'fuck you' for being forced into suburbs. Were saying 'fuck you' to the people who built suburbs instead of high density housing and made housing near your job unaffordable.

And the people who genuinely had the choice (I might argue you didn't) and chose to pay extra for suburb.

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LordKitsuna 2 points 2 years ago

I mean to be fair people might be more open to it if high density housing didn't suck ass. The exact same shitty template copy pasted a thousand times. It's honestly not even that it's the same that's the problem it's that the template sucks ass.

There is a middle ground between high-density housing and showing you into a tiny poorly put together space but nobody seems willing to build that. Give me a suburb house, a full two floors, with a standard layout. And turn that into high density housing and I'm willing to bet a lot more people would be fine with it.

It's not like that's even all that difficult to imagine, we build fucking skyscrapers 100 plus stories tall there's zero reason we couldn't just take a two-story suburb townhome and just stack 50 of them on top of each other. Then the only thing lost is a dedicated garage and your own private backyard which some people will still heavily want but it's a much easier pill to swallow versus the "shitty cramped poorly designed apartment layout"

Also it should be mandatory that high density housing has a minimum of one dedicated parking spot per unit, the first two floors of any high-density buildings should be dedicated to a parking garage. That is the other thing that makes people say fuck you to high density housing is it's always a shit ton of units crammed into not enough parking and it's a huge pita to deal with. Do we need better design the cities that are less reliant on cars for transport? Yes, but you should still expect at least one car per unit regardless it's just the reality of America

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melpomenesclevage 2 points 2 years ago

I agree we do dog shit architecture, especially residential.

We do not need more parking spaces though. We need trains. I'm sorry, but its too late to be putting more fucking cars on the road; even 'clean' electric ones.

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SparrowRanjitScaur 1 point 2 years ago

Who pays extra for suburbs? Suburbs are significantly cheaper than the city.

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melpomenesclevage 3 points 2 years ago

Because they're subsidized to Fuck and city costs are inflated. Suburbs are ecological nightmares, and cannot continue to exist if you want a green earth in 80 years.

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boonhet 3 points 2 years ago

I did the same math and my results came out the opposite way - in a much cheaper country however. I had a rent free situation over an hour away, but ended up renting an apartment near work. My time alone was worth it, being able to pay the month's rent using one week's commute time for freelancing after work. And the monthly fuel cost itself would've been 2/3 of my month's rent.

Everyone's circumstances are different. I made what I believe was the most sensible economic decision - paying to get out of commuting. For you, the opposite was sensible, commuting to reduce rent. Can't really judge you for doing what's best for your wallet in these tough times we're living.

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PiJiNWiNg 9 points 2 years ago
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melpomenesclevage 2 points 2 years ago

You don't have neighbors though. Not in american suburbs at least. Not in any good way.

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PiJiNWiNg 2 points 2 years ago
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Harbinger01173430 7 points 2 years ago

Anything with the prefix SUB is garbage except subtitles or submarines.

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radicalautonomy 5 points 2 years ago

Or...you know... rawr

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Harbinger01173430 2 points 2 years ago

Rawr rawr

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100_kg_90_de_belin 10 points 2 years ago

We're talking about sex, right?

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UsernameIsTooLon 7 points 2 years ago

I mean if you get urban and rural, what's there not to get about the suburbs? It's the best and worst of both. More open lands and less congestion but also rush hour sucks and people suck at driving. It's far to go get something, but car rides with buddies is its own fun.

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Swedneck 13 points 2 years ago

It's not the best of both though, it just the worst of both.

The best of both are small towns along railways, with a dense core with some amenities surrounded by decreasing density until it quickly becomes pure countryside, and thanks to the station it's easy to get to and from the big city.

And if you only want rural surroundings you can have train halts basically in the middle of nowhere, there's a couple like that in my region and it's absolutely delightful.

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melpomenesclevage 6 points 2 years ago

Oh my fuck that sounds so cool. I think youre right. Trains, as always, are key.

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PiJiNWiNg 1 point 2 years ago
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Swedneck 6 points 2 years ago

huh? why would suburbs magically be exempt from that idea?

Yes, places grow, this is why it's important to apply good urban planning and use as much high density housing as possible, otherwise you get the miserable car-dependent sprawl we see in america and much of the rest of the world.

By centering around transit stops you get rid of the need for all the parking and roads that takes a ton of space (which lets urban areas be smaller while containing the same amount of living space), and by having many small towns with high density centers spread out like this you maximize how many people can live close to the countryside.

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melpomenesclevage 4 points 2 years ago

Not the best. The best of rural is nature wildness and independence. The ability to wander off into your backyard and shoot something and not get an eyebrow raised. The ability to pick a direction, and start walking, and not turn around until your water gets low, then go home, and not meet another person unless you choose to. The option to just dig a big ass hole or marvel at the intricacy of the ecology. Maybe have a few dozen semi feral cats, so nobody xan quite say you are ir arent the creepy cat lady. The best of rural is room to experiment and play, to be entirely food independent, etc. And oh my god it can get so quiet! Its nice. Peaceful, if a little rough. And if something goes horribly globally wrong? Might not even be your problem.

Suburbs have... A little privacy indoors, I guess? Room for a small garden, if your house is old, maybe some fruit trees? A garage to play with if you don't drive, which is a major sacrifice?

The best of urban us art culture and people at your fingertips, connectedness and depth. Walking two blocks into an entirely different world, hopping on the train/bus to a dozen art museums and twice as many different cuisines and so many options. Knowing that there are friends for you nearby, if you just find them. Enemies too, probably. Its collaboration and history and the intense humanness of the designed world around you, and oh my god the architecture. At its best, which I admit is rare, its the very very almost imperceptibly low grade version of the thrill of collaboration all the time. And if something goes horribly globally wrong, at least you know youre not alone. Its pretty cool. I'm a fan.

Suburbs have none of this. They pretend at the restaurants, but they're all chain shit, homogenized to pointlessness.

Suburbs are garbage. Youre as dependent on long ass supply chains as an urban core, but you're all tiny little ratter dogs pretending to be wolves on the tundra, so you don't acknowledge or embrace it. You get all the isolation with none of the solitude. It takes almost as long to get anywhere, but you can't just chill on your farm or go forage in the woods, so you need to go.

Suburbs ate garbage poison and ecologically unsustainable. One can argue modern cities are unsustainable too, but there's room for doubt on that one; there are economies of scale to take advantage of.

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SparrowRanjitScaur 1 point 2 years ago

I like suburbs because it's relatively calm, I can build a workshop in my garage, and there's still pretty good amenities. And it's significantly cheaper than the city.

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Hiro8811 25 points 2 years ago

USA moment in the middle

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crapwittyname 25 points 2 years ago

I've been an urban pedestrian/cyclist all my life. Unfortunately I chose a career path that means I now have to work far from a city. I just failed my driving test. I don't even want to drive. I fucking hate this so much.

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wander1236 23 points 2 years ago

What if I'm a rural non-farmer?

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variants 19 points 2 years ago

Then you will die, eventually

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knightly 12 points 2 years ago

Trade with your neighbors.

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akilou 8 points 2 years ago

You don't have to be a farmer to have chickens. Get chickens

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janus2 18 points 2 years ago

me, being broke/cheap/lazy: repeats recipe search adding keyword "eggless"

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kameecoding 6 points 2 years ago

In baking psyllium husks can be used as replacement is what I have heard.

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janus2 6 points 2 years ago

Yes, have used psyllium, flax seeds, and chia seeds to varying degrees of success. Xanthan gum never hurts either

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JasonDJ 2 points 2 years ago

You saying I can crack open some fiber capsules for an egg substitute?

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janus2 1 point 2 years ago

In baking, in many cases, yes

For an omelette, no

for baking, I mix 1 tsp psyllium with 3 Tbsp room temperature water and let it sit for about 5 minutes (or until an egg-like viscosity)

psylli-egg has a more neutral texture and flavor than a flax or chia egg. unlike flax it won't go rancid (I'm still using a large bucket of it that's years old and hasn't changed flavor or effectiveness). its only real downside is it takes slightly longer to hydrate

I personally wouldn't try to replicate a shakshuka or anything with it but if you try let me know how it goes haha

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kameecoding 2 points 2 years ago

Heh, that is the combo I mix into my oatmeal cake, it's oats, psyllium, flax, chia, some protein powder, lots of berries, old bananas, comes out really good.

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janus2 1 point 2 years ago

that sounds like the aftermath comes out real good too, lol

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Swedneck 1 point 2 years ago

in what universe is psyllium husk cheaper than eggs? This reads like suggesting wagyu as a replacement for pork

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kameecoding 1 point 2 years ago

Who said anything about it being cheaper?

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Swedneck 1 point 2 years ago

"me, being broke/cheap/lazy"

that implies they want a cheap substitute for eggs, to which you replied with something you need to order online..

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boomzilla 1 point 2 years ago

Aquafaba. Can be bought readymade but is also a by-product of cooking dried chickpeas. After soaking chickpeas in water for a night discard the soaking water. Bring fresh water to boil and cook the chickpeas for 1/2 an hour or so. Collect the cooking water. You can even also freeze it for later use. It's important to bring it to room temperature before using it in baking. Can bring a good amount of fluffyness to your doughs.

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Swedneck 2 points 2 years ago

No clue why you got downvoted, bean water is kind of just the best egg substitute, if the leftover water from soaking dried beans works as an egg subsitute why on god's green earth would people use anything else? (yes obviously they should use something else if they can't eat beans, i should not have to say that)

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boomzilla 0 points 2 years ago
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computerscientistI 16 points 2 years ago

...do you know how crowded Costco is on Sundays.

As a German: I hate you.

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noli 5 points 2 years ago

Why? Cause shops are open on sunday? Having no workers rights makes that a lot easier

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KoboldOfArtifice 11 points 2 years ago

Shops closing on Sundays in Germany is no workers rights issue. No one is asking workers to work 7 days a week.

Germany as plenty of students, for example, who'd love to have a job on the weekend because they have the freedom to choose a bit better when they work and when not.

The reason Sunday to this day is still a day when almost all shops have to close is mostly religious. There are restaurants and some other shops that are allowed to stay open and most of them choose either a different rest day or make sure that they have someone on any of those days. One workday on a Sunday is plenty to fill out a typical untaxed low payment job that are very useful to students and others looking to just get a bit of an income.

Actual workers rights aren't telling people that they can never work on Sundays, they're guaranteeing people that they will never need to work too much.

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computerscientistI 11 points 2 years ago

Why? Cause shops are open on sunday? Having no workers rights makes that a lot easier

Yes. Shops being closed on Sundays is a major PITA. I have 2 days off a week. So I have to buy groceries in overcrowded shops in the evening or in overcrowded shops on Saturdays. Or I drive across the border and buy in Luxemburg, on Sundays. So the VAT I am creating stays in another country. Which is just plain stupid.

Also: workers' rights and shops being open on Sundays aren't mutually exclusive.

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barsoap 3 points 2 years ago

The churches don't have enough political influence to keep Sunday a rest day. That we still have a mostly closed down Sunday (minus vital and emergency services and recreation) is union influence. IG Metall and Ver.di would skin the SPD alive if they were to propose abolishing it.

Consider the alternative: All your friends have different days off, so organising a grill party becomes a once in a summer opportunity when all your days off happen to align.

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trashgirlfriend 2 points 2 years ago

Isn't IG Metall mostly a manufacturing workers union? Those jobs usually get weekends off either way, no?

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melpomenesclevage 2 points 2 years ago

Yes but people who aren't Christians don't count. Duh.

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Pretzilla 1 point 2 years ago

Ray of hope: many if not most places of business in the US were closed Sundays through the 60's.

Then religious influence waned, and capitalism and consumer influence grew and businesses listened.

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KillingTimeItself 14 points 2 years ago

your chicken hasn't laid an egg? go ask your neighbor! They'll probably have some.

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mctoasterson 12 points 2 years ago

I live in suburbia in the US and I can walk to 3 different grocery stores from my house. If I go to the warehouse store, I will drive. Between telework, walking, and avoiding unnecessary trips to various places, I try to drive less than 1 mile per day.

Density kinda sucks to live in, but we can all make more effort to waste less energy.

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Michal 3 points 2 years ago

If you drive less than 1 mile per day it sounds like you shouldn't have to drive at all. It's walking distance - is your destination not reachable on foot?

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mctoasterson 3 points 2 years ago

Its an average. Some days I don't drive at all. Some days I have to bring a family member several miles to an appointment, or get something bulky from a store that I can't feasibly move without a vehicle.

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BlitzoTheOisSilent 3 points 2 years ago

I'm in the same boat, I have two grocery stores, three gas stations, a bank, several fast food/take out restaurants, a Home Depot, a pharmacy, and several walking trails, all within about a 10-15 minute walk from my house. Also live in suburbia, and would like to get a bike this summer to start cutting out driving.

Can't eliminate most of my driving though, I work about 30 minutes from home for a general contractor, and public transport would require me to leave my dog alone for over 12 hours a day, which just isn't an option.

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Stormygeddon 11 points 2 years ago

Blood is a good replacement for eggs in recipe. Use like 4 tablespoons per egg you'd have used in your recipe.

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Patches 25 points 2 years ago

Instructions unclear: I grabbed 4 tablespoons like you said but it won't stop. Oh God it's everywhere, and it hurts so bad. Halp.

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Buddahriffic 6 points 2 years ago

There's a simple solution. If the recipe calls for n eggs and you're replacing each egg with 60mL of blood but instead have M mL of blood, make M/(60*N) recipes.

Eg, recipe calls for 2 eggs and you've bled 1.5 L of blood, first do the difficult conversion from L to mL (my witch doctor tells me it's 1500 mL). Now, use the formula: 1500 / (60*2), which simplifies to 25 / 2 or 12.5.

You just need to make 12.5 of your recipe. Just multiply each of the ingredients by 12.5 and you'll be good. Oh and you'll need to adjust cooking time, too, though maybe keep a fire extinguisher handy.

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Crashumbc 3 points 2 years ago

Didn't have eggs but had BLOOD handy...

Hmm something you'd like to tell us?

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Kase 1 point 2 years ago

Are you saying you don't have blood??

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HootinNHollerin 10 points 2 years ago

Suburbanite should ideally go to their backyard garden/ chicken coop

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Voyajer 32 points 2 years ago

And then the HOA puts a lien on your home for refusing to get rid of your chickens.

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HootinNHollerin 13 points 2 years ago

Death to HOAs.

I still rent, unfortunately, (southern California) but at least my neighborhood doesn’t have an HOA. Those suburban sprawl super sterile neighborhoods like I grew up in in another state are just not at all attractive to live in.

I have a pretty large garden and sometime this year will have a chicken coop, as it’s allowed here as long as no roosters. Also just bought a greenhouse kit. Eating your own food is incredible.

!gardening@lemmy.world !balconygardening@slrpnk.net !backyardchickens@lemmy.ca !greenhouse_growers@lemmy.world

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hector 9 points 2 years ago
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RatBin 4 points 2 years ago

Europe's city centers are friggin expensive, if you know what I'm talking about you know. The suburbs are usually fine, also some of the best paces ever are between the suburbs and the center. Locals in the old town will make you pay for the oxygen they have in

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Bartsbigbugbag 4 points 2 years ago

In China it’s easy to afford rent in most of the cities on a full time minimum wage job, and the cities are extremely walkable. My wife lives in a 18 story building, and immediately outside of her development are at least 6 supermarkets, 20 restaurants and countless bus stations and subway stations. Sounds like it’s more of a problem with the economic system than the city itself.

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hector 4 points 2 years ago
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Bartsbigbugbag 2 points 2 years ago

It is the single greatest place I have ever been in my life. The air pollution in the cities I went to, which included Beijing, was no worse than it is in my Colorado city. They’ve done a lot to combat it, and though there’s still bad days, we also have bad days. Hell, we were known for the “brown cloud” for decades, and still regularly have inversions that cause the cloud these days, thankfully much less often though. There’s also a lot more electric vehicles there than there are here, so less ground level pollution from exhaust. I felt so sick my first couple days back in the states and everything smelled so bad. I didn’t even realize how bad it was until my nose wasn’t accustomed to it anymore.

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Croquette 2 points 2 years ago

What boggles my mind here, in my province, is that a lot of new dense condos/apartments are built without any walkable services. It is mind boggling that it still happens.

Nothing worse than having to take your car to do small errands.

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Bartsbigbugbag 2 points 2 years ago

We have to fight the armies of NIMBYs and developers to even get a suite of overpriced luxury condos or apartments built, and we’re still building gigantic McMansion suburbs like they’re going out of style, so I feel that in my bones. My nearest grocery store is more than 2 miles away, and there’s no way to get there without having to go down a 45mph road with no sidewalks. But we have pretty monoculture lawns! -_- thank god my family is willing to turn most of our lawn into pollinator gardens and food gardens… now if only we could convince our neighbors to do the same.

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trashgirlfriend 4 points 2 years ago

I think I only ever lived in the real "center" of a city once when I was crashing at a friends place while looking for an apartment.

All of my other places have been further out in neighborhoods outside of the center but there were still shops everywhere. Single use zoning and the tendency to obsess over shitty copypaste single family homes is the real culprit in the US.

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PapaStevesy 8 points 2 years ago

I guess if you live on a farm or walk to the grocery store, you don't have an internal monologue?

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BallsandBayonets 15 points 2 years ago

The suburbanite's monologue definitely isn't internal.

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melpomenesclevage 4 points 2 years ago

Yeah ive heard that (the speech in OP) so many times.

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Sibbo 7 points 2 years ago

Who can even afford living in a city or on the country side? City is too expensive, and country side is cheap but there are no jobs. If you wanna have some kind of a decent-sized place for a family with kids, suburbia is a must unless you are somehow rich. Or happen to have a job that exists in the country side.

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kameecoding 11 points 2 years ago

Only because the zoning laws suck and you have a missing middle.

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Swedneck 4 points 2 years ago

Here in sweden you can find municipal housing apartments for 400 bucks per month literally right in the middle of downtown, in smaller cites.

The wonders of actually building enough housing and not having it all be for profit.

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Gabu 0 points 2 years ago

Who can even afford living in a city

Most people. America has less than 4% of the global population.

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Semi_Hemi_Demigod 7 points 2 years ago

My suburb doesn't allow chickens as they're livestock, but it does allow egg-laying ducks because those are apparently pets.

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Swedneck 2 points 2 years ago

Ducks are better anyways, they don't tend to eat the vegetables in your garden and aren't raging psychopaths.

Also capable of being severely cute.

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chatokun 6 points 2 years ago

I'm allergic to eggs all of a sudden, so I use a substitute.

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Rebels_Droppin 9 points 2 years ago

I've learned in the comments that blood is a good one

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Swedneck 3 points 2 years ago

or just bean water afaik

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Okokimup 6 points 2 years ago

you need eggs for dinner

Do you, though? I've swapped which nights I'm making which dinners so I can pick up missing ingredients on a day I'm going out anyway.

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Crashumbc 1 point 2 years ago

Yes in this case you do. Did you read the "meme"?

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maniacalmanicmania 4 points 2 years ago

All the corner stores in Sydney have been turned into homes.

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Kolanaki 2 points 2 years ago

Shit, I grew up in the suburbs and it was pretty much the same as the urbanite. Except "corner store" was "egg ranch" and you had to walk out of town to get there.

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lseif 1 point 2 years ago

is there a r/eggsfordinner on lemmy ?

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isVeryLoud 1 point 2 years ago

Minivan? Try GMC Suburban.

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LemmyKnowsBest 1 point 2 years ago
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kamen 1 point 2 years ago

Imagine having so much time to complain.

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The_Tired_Horizon 0 points 2 years ago

Yes. I'd like to pay 50quid for some eggs please, Mr Cornershopman. 😂

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Michal 1 point 2 years ago

You don't notice the increased cost if you have to pay micro transactions to go anywhere.

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The_Tired_Horizon 1 point 2 years ago

TBH its a 15 minute walk to the main Lidl, or a 4 minute one the other way to the nearest corner shop down here. Cant do a full shop on foot (I could steal the trolley for a bit, LOL) but eggs is doable here.

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Michal 3 points 2 years ago

Bicycle is a great investment. I go to my lidl by bike as much as possible and do proper shopping with single Pannier bag. It's farther than yours, but it's also easier to carry more stuff on a bike.

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The_Tired_Horizon 3 points 2 years ago

I've got 4 bikes... ahem.. ..yeah used to ride to the shops, to work. Havent really done it for 4 years due to some stuff that happened.

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