Landlords hate this simple trick!

No wifi

Pet T-Rex hack.

Free rent hack.

Free food jack.

Personal football stadium hack.

Indestructible Safe house hack.

And when you’re bored of that life, wait for the t-Rex to go extinct. They’re very well known for it.

Humana last weeks without food, you think you're going to starvea 7 ton, cold blooded carrion eater to death in a mere month?

It probably sucks down sharp bones no problem. But then, nobody really has any idea. It could play the ukulele for all we know.

Use the knife to threaten the guy who's job it is to feed it.

It's very telling that some people have had worse roommates than a T. Rex lol

Or just wait for the T. rex to be on its deathbed, then kill it.

Additionally, poop in it's food (if it has any). E. Coli poisoning may help.

Whose fecal matter? I need your response ASAP

Good question. Many modern day reptiles can go a long time without food. But a t rex is many orders of magnitude bigger than anything we have now. I did do a zoology major at uni, but my physiology knowledge sucks (unsurprising given I barely passed it).

I'm not sure it could survive in today's atmosphere, there was a lot more oxygen when megafauna like the T rex wer about.

No they will provide you with food

I'll defer to actual paleontologists (or anyone who drops links), but my guess is T-Rex could go a month without food easy. Most modern large reptiles typically go a long time between meals.

Edit: following the intense scholarship in this thread, I have changed my stance. T-Rex probably would not survive a month without food (or water). BUT ALSO, the entity setting the rules and betting 500 mil on it surviving is going to know that. So the Dino's getting fed either way.

With a dinosaur as a pet, no less!

THE OLE DICK TWIST

Also, most apex predators are heavy sleepers because they have absolutely nothing to be scared of when they're asleep. As an example, male lions sleep for 18-20 hours a day.

I imagine you’d walk up to an eyelid that’s thicker than your arm, luckily still wedge the knife between the eye, get absolutely deafened as it screams out in pain, and either trampled or catapulted as it flails about, or just plain nommed on as it sees you with the remaining good eye.

How exactly did you plan on getting over to the other eye before getting crunched, anyways? They’re not exactly tiny heads.

We don't know if they ever slept. We don't even know if they had fur or not.

STAB IT IN THE DICK!

The deception! The cunning! It's an outrage! Put this man on the air at once!

This is pure gold

Ah, ye old homo sapien hunter trick

According to the documentary Jurassic Park, a T-Rex can clock in at 35 mph. Plus, in the area of a football field, if you do get any kind of a lead, it can just cut you off when you need to turn.

I was doing some research to see if this is feasible, and found this page with this passage:

(Though 12 miles per hour approaches the top speed of a typical human, depending on conditioning—it equates to a 20-second 100 meter dash or a 5-minute mile—the T. rex’s slow acceleration and inspiring teeth would give the average runner a reasonable chance of outsprinting or outmaneuvering the lumbering predator.)

So yeah I'm gonna spend 3 weeks training to run in the indestructible bunker, then I'm gonna spend every day for a week sprinting around the T-Rex until it can't follow me anymore. It will still be able to lash out after it collapses, so you can't just walk up and kill it, but you can harass it any time it tries to take a break to eat or drink for a few days. Eventually it'll be too weak to lash out, and you can safely walk up and cut a major artery or something.

Or you can stab it with a poop knife while it's asleep in the first few days, and have it die from an infection over the course of a few weeks

Lol exactly what I thought, except keeping the knife and going back for the other eye.

I'd start with feet. Slow it down.

The largest animal we have known to ever live is alive right now, the blue whale.

there is a reason why such giant creatures don't exist anymore.

Such giant creatures do exist. Larger ones even.

By far the most robust theory for the mass extinction event that wiped dinosaurs out is the asteroid theory. Not there being a sudden extreme change in oxygen levels lol.

there is a reason why such giant creatures don't exist anymore.

Yes, it's because of an asteroid.

Large dinosaurs were significantly larger than large mammals for basically the same reasons that birds can fly much longer and higher than bats: hollow bones and significantly more efficient lungs. Flying birds can also get much larger than bats, despite both breathing the same atmosphere.

Dinosaur lungs worked the same way bird lungs do. Their lungs are rigid, and there's separate sets of air sacs that work like bellows to pump the air through the lungs in a single direction. Much like fish gills, there's cross-current gas exchange so they cab extract most of the oxygen from the air.

Oxygen levels weren't really any higher. Dinosaurs just had some adaptations that let them both get bigger than other groups of animals and be better at flying.

The better question is why large birds haven't re-evolved. That's probably just due to the success of mammals. 10 ft tall "terror birds" evolved in the Americas, but went extinct within the last two million years due to competition from mammals. Birds could get larger than elephants, but first an elephant-sized bird needs to outcompete elephants.

I think it's where the "enclosed" part of the challenge would come into play. I'd demand that it be air tight for the duration of the challenge.

Although a TRex wouldn't be feeling great at our oxygen levels, I'd be surprised if it would be enough to have it drop dead on it's own. I think you'd still need to fatigue the TRex, and doing anything to further deplete the oxygen in the environment would hurt you both... But the TRex proportionality moreso

If I remember correctly higher oxigen levels influenced insects' size, not vertebrates!

Iirc oxygen levels were lower in the Late Cretaceous than they are today. Also, it is likely saurischian non-avian dinosaurs breathed more like their living bird relatives, which is a lot more efficient, thus allowing for a larger size.

People die when they are killed

When you die irl you just die, bummer

If you die, you die in real life.

That's smart

https://youtu.be/...

2:38

Oh this is actually a pretty decent idea!

Just dig deep a deep enough hole that it won't be able to escape then lure it in.

Bonus points if you dig the hole down path from a creek then drown it, it'd have to be a pretty big hole though.

Once it's stuck in the hole just tie the knife to a long stick and poke away.

Maybe sharpen a bunch of sticks and have them at the bottom of the hole so when it falls in it at least fucks it's feet up or possibly is impaled depending on the size of stick.

Idk I'm starting to think fuck the knife, just give me a shovel, a month may be steep for such a big hole but I've done enough digging for a living to know it's possible, if you're motivated enough.

bonus: alternatively, dig relatively small holes everywhere so it breaks it's legs

I think they overlooked the dinosaurs food. If you have food and an indestructible hut, couldn't you just wait until the T-rex was passing out from hunger and slice its throat?

You probably want a very large quantities of those things. Even if chocolate somehow is poisonous to them, a Hershey bar ain't going to do it for something that big.

I had a German Shepard that ate a whole pan of brownies with chocolate chips and broken glass in it, once, and it didn't even affect him. I was afraid he was going to die, but he ended up being perfectly fine.

Usually you can target a glowing area that only becomes visible when it roars

• Above commenter is a dark souls protagonist.

Real warriors parry

I'd go for the arms, since I feel like I'd have better chances against them.

Alligators can go years without, I'm guessing it's a long time

I don't know man, I would probably die from this stress even if I lived in an indestructible hut.

But 500 million dollars could buy like, one T-Rex.

This was kind of my thought too, maybe attach the knife to the hut, pop your head out and piss the T-rex off, it comes over to try kill you and cuts itself.. I just doubt it would do it enough to kill itself before it leart not to attack the hut.

What if he breaks the stick and now he has the knife?

Jokes on you. T-Rexes love poop.

This is plausible because you can survive entirely on dinosaur farts until you cut yourself out of their intestines.

I'm no animologist, but dinosaurs are birds, and don't birds eat rocks and shit to aid in digestion? I just wonder how their digestive tract stands up to bones. Not shitting on anything here just want to make sure we all know how to kill this dinosaur right.

And obviously the distinction you made about cooking bones is interesting, I've boiled stock/broth of my own and snapped a wishbone or two, but never put that together so that's interesting.

T-rex was also a scavenger, rotten food would do nothing to that thing, but yeah poopy knife would do just fine lol

How confident are you that it's really asleep? How sure are you that you can move without waking it up?

Are you sure? A big animal requires a huge amount of calories to keep going

... No it wouldn't.

Larger animals typically can go longer without food than smaller animals. You'll starve to death before it does.

The speed of metabolism is vastly different

You're right, I could make more money by displaying it in a special park

Think of all the unique creatures you can save with 500M. The only thing you can do living in a capitalistic society and don't like it is to improvise. Adapt. Overcome.

It's not like you get to keep the rex after the month is up, the psycho multibillionaire just sends you back home emptyhanded

Your area is the size of a football field. You won't have time to dig massive holes.

So we're swapping the snail out for a T-Rex?

Yes we do, and it's great.

It picks it up and wears it like a hat when it becomes enraged after a recent attempt on it's life.

Yeah, it's getting annoying :/