They'll say that their work is mainly talking to other people
My last company
So you were part of the 20%? Or did you just nope tf out?
True for the phone and tablet, but for any sort of computer that is not true
I work on a laptop with virtual desktops and I am much more productive that way than with a big screen... Or two big screens.
Everything is in the center of my field of view, I know which VD of my 3x3 grid holds what. It's much more efficient for me than bigger screens could ever be. And that is not for lack of trying!
It just depends on the person.
You just changed how I think about virtual screens. I feel like Khan being unloaded on by Kirk.
I decided long ago that I liked the single monitor with multiple desktops. But in my head they have always been a line of desktops instead of a grid.
Somewhere there is a mathematician who uses a hyper cube array of desktops…
When I discovered it can be arranged in a grid, it made VDs so much more useful.
Cause a line of the same amount of VDs (9)... Ugh, not fun haha
Even though you can map each to a shortcut, it's still tougher to use than a grid with directional shortcuts!
VDs arranged in a grid ? Why ?
Faster switch. Think each column being 1-3 and each row as A-C
B2 is my terminals, B3 is my IDE, B1 is a secondary IDE (for instance, DataGrip), C row is browser windows, A1-2 is temporary, not often used windows, A3 is communication apps. I mostly use A3, B2-3 and C2-3. It's all mapped in my head so I can instantly switch to whichever VD I need.
That's impressive
Personally I never needed more than 5 desktops, and I don't think I could remember what I put on more desktops
The job of people around the CEO is primarily to make decisions. All this huge chain of managers is needed only to aggregate information so that the CEO can make an informed decision. This is how many large companies operate. I would even say that there is a direct correlation between the size of the campaign and the number of monitors at the bottom.
The flip side of sitting behind a huge monitor is that you won't stay outside with a huge number of your employees if you make the wrong decision. It's just a different job.
Well, I can only write from my own experience. I've worked for several major campaigns in my life. In banks, in telecom operators. And it's almost always been like this. And where there was none, the campaign collapsed. Not in a moment, of course, because campaigns, like people, do not die instantly, but age and degrade. But as a result, it was.
there is a direct correlation between the size of the campaign and the number of monitors at the bottom.
From my limited experience, it's the size/amount of monitors at the top that correlates with company size, not at the bottom. At my 5-person software company, almost everyone works with multiple screens, except one of the three founders who still works mainly on a laptop display at least
Its almost as if the more real work you do, the less you matter.
I wonder what would happen if the higher up in a company you get, the less you got payed. I'd imagine more actual work would be accomplished.
It saddens me the fact that there are people out there wanting to do more work.
The game is rigged. Do nothing and get paid.
Just had a conversation with someone on this last weekend. They’re what I call someone dependent on corporate daycare. They need to be working or they lack self value. Their boss is an ass, hardly works and this guy thinks he’s slacking at 12 hours a day (exaggerated only a little).
What are you doing that is so important? Is it saving someone’s life? Life changing cancer drugs? No no, it’s a PowerPoint that shows the progress on the projects of equally less important tasks that is only making your boss look good.
And the fucker still thinks he’s not WORKING HARD ENOUGH!!
Yeah it is truly sad. I wish with all my heart that I could have one of those government jobs where I would do the minimum and still get paid well, but sadly, I am stuck in the corporate world.
Thankfully, I just give them my 1% and do the Barr minimum to get the annual increments...but fuck I just hate wasting 8 hours of my life a day doing worthless computer shit. It pays the bills though.
The higher you go the closer you get to the people who actually controls the capital. The CEO can have a personal relationship with the board, people who do actual work are merely a number to the higher-ups.
The CEO is usually on the board and a lot of the other board members will also be CEOs but yes
Perfecting the art of brown-nosing.
I have eight. 🤡
Most monitors has got to be the security guard's CCTV, so it does track!
Ok I just wana know your hardware setup. Not really the monitors but what you are doing for video output. Assuming either specialized cards with alot of dvi outputs(mini dvi?) or multiple gpus or even just dvi dasiychain?
I'm counting laptop screens as 1 and externals as 1.
3 laptops all with secondary monitors and two surface devices attached to my wall.
the surfaces are displaying system monitoring and portfolio details
laptop a is for job a
laptop b is for job b
laptop c is personal
They got you taking care of the cockroach problem in the basement?
I bring a portable screen from home, bringing me to a total of 4 with the laptop screen.
But I just like lots of monitors
I feel wrong.
I have an iPhone, and a laptop and 2 screens.
Fact is, in my company, higher ups have more screens than me. Like phone, desktop, couple monitors and huge wall monitor.
Nah, actually, in a typical company the lower down the ranks you are the less likely you are to be fired, statistically speaking (to a point, of course you're more likely to be fired while on probation or something).
Hello my brother/sister/velociraptor/etc in screens. We're worthless together 💖
and yet... if it's a company that's a bit slack on security, the right command in the right place by someone with 2 monitors can kill the company dead.
A few well placed commands by a few lowly 2 monitor types are always the kind of things that derail companies on a fundamental level.
What senior management always forget is that they need us vastly more than we need them...
My spouse and I work for a contractor that is having trouble hiring experienced people like us, so they have been hiring fresh grads outta school. There is a limited pool of experience here, so when management throws a fit one of us is overloaded or gets sick and can’t meet the budget or deadline, it ends with nothing because they can’t afford to lose us. We work on the power grid and it’s a relatively small pool of engineers doing the work we do. Also, I’m rocking two work laptops with a home setup of 4 monitors and an office setup of 3, but still feel pretty important!
There are exceptions. My ex CEO and his nepo kids demanded ultrawides so they could more efficiently watch Fox News and get scammed by horny MILFS in their area that want to hook up NOW.
Why would anyone fire someone who works so much for so little?
This is true up until a point, and then the pattern starts to reverse. Like, the receptionist isn't going to get 2 monitors. They're likely to get one monitor and a very old desktop, or an old laptop.
Edit: Also an intern / co-op student / work experience student, etc. is probably as low as you can go on the totem pole of office work. I bet in many cases they're not even assigned a permanent office / cubicle since they're expected to shadow / be mentored by a variety of people. As a result, they probably get a second-hand, used laptop.
And, if the company has retail sales, techs who do installations, etc. they're often very low on the totem pole, and they're often not getting a computer at all. Maybe in some cases they'd get a "work phone", so they'd have the same kind of equipment as the CEO, but effectively be at the opposite end of the pole from them.
Heh, I bet if you're the CEO of a megacorp, you might not even carry your own electronics. You just have a gaggle of assistants around you who you bark orders at, and then they use their electronics to do something.
"Importance™"
Kinda reminds me this Game one plays in Theatre which is to Play The Status (you're given a number between 1 and 10, with 1 having the lowest social status and 10 the highest, and you try and act as such a person).
Alongside the whole chin-down to chin-up thing, people tend to do more fast and confident moving the higher the status, but the reality is that whilst indeed up the scale in professional environment the higher the status the more busy and rushed they seem, the trully highest status people (the 10s) don't at all rush: as I put it back then (this was the UK) "the Queen doesn't rush because for everybody the right time for the Queen to be somewhere is when she's there, even it it's not actually so, hence she doesn't need to rush".
There was also some cartoon making the rounds many years ago about how people on a company looked depending on their social status, were you started with the unkept shabbily dressed homeless person that lived outside the vuilding, and as you went up the professional scale people got progressively more well dressed and into suits and such, and then all of a sudden a big switch, as the company owner at the top dressed as shabbily as the homeless person.
Mid manager replacement prompt
You are a mid level manager tasked with creating a McKinsey-style, action-led PowerPoint pack. The input is [insert source: report, transcript, dataset, notes, etc.]. Your task is to transform it into a concise, executive-ready presentation that drives decision-making. Follow these rules:
- Overall structure:
Title page (client/project context).
Executive summary (3–5 key takeaways, action-oriented).
Situation analysis (context, data, and insights).
Key findings (use MECE structure: Mutually Exclusive, Collectively Exhaustive).
Recommendations (clear, prioritized, action-led).
Implementation roadmap (phases, timeline, responsibilities).
Risks & mitigations.
Appendix (supporting detail, charts, data tables).
- Slide design principles:
Each slide has one clear message in the title (action-oriented, ‘so-what’ statement).
Use the pyramid principle (top-down storytelling: answer first, then supporting evidence).
Keep text minimal, favor charts, diagrams, and visuals.
Apply MECE logic to group insights.
Recommendations must be specific, actionable, and prioritized.
- Tone & Style:
Professional, concise, fact-based.
Focus on clarity and impact.
Avoid jargon unless essential.
Make it CEO-ready: every slide should be understandable in under 10 seconds.
Somebody in your company who used to work for Mckinsey is now in a position to spend money on Mckinsey. If they spend enough over a long period the they will be invited back to become partner.
Which is to say that you could replace them with a see n say wearing a tie.
Compensation is inversely proportional to productivity.
Here is the expendability graph
📉
If the guy with the "don't-turn-off"-server gets fired everyone know that the ship will sink
It's funny when a big exec leaves and other execs are rushing to reassure us they are to to the challenge of dealing with such a key person departing....
We do not care at all. We have zero confidence in any of them and do not care about any of them
We didn't have a CEO for half a year... What changed? Nothing..
Then we got a new CEO.. His new policies caused loss of revenue so we had to fire 50 people..
Thank god for that save
Oh we were similarly "rudderless" when a major executive left.
Adding to the amusement of the constant panic of missing leadership, was when someone asked about simply promoting one of the interim executives to full time and just getting on with it. This was in a town hall with the CEO and the interim executive in question and in front of everyone the CEO said simply that the interim executive wasn't competent enough to do the job.
Quite an effective way to destroy someone's reputation and ego.
What a colleague! Haha!
4 monitors & 2 compiters at my last job; 1 computer and 3 monitors at this job... 🎵movin' on up...🎵
Apparently I'm off the end of the chart. My last workplace set up had:
- primary 15" laptop with two external monitors (so 3 screens in use simultaneously)
- secondary 15" laptop with external monitor (so another 2 screens) when the primary one was tied up doing heavy processing (I was lucky and managed to hold onto my previous laptop when we did the usual rounds of device upgrades whereas most people just returned them to IT to be retired, so I had a spare that I could readily take home for WFH days without messing with my main office setup)
- a standalone PC monitor (for automation stuff, so the screen was there just for monitoring as needed)
I avoided overtime like the plague since my employer didn't like to deal with it (so if circumstances required me to work overtime my supervisor was pretty good about allowing me to take it as time in lieu the following week), but unfortunately there were definitely times where I had to log in on the weekend (the challenge of having customers that require support 7 days a week).
Hi, it's me. Two Monitor Man.
Depends how lucky you are. There is a guy who works in upper management and he has the privilege to order new equipment for his office, which is all expenses paid by the company. He built a gaming computer complete with neon lights and four monitors right in his office.
"Honey, I will be late from work! I will be back at 3am!"
teabags scrumballs69 in Call of Duty
Absolutely no corruption in private industry tho the invisible hand takes care of it
The waste and corruption in private industry is mind bogglingly huge compared to the public sector.
When I think of corporate corruption, I think of cooking the books, lobbying the government, bribing, or even straight up harassment and assassination. But in this case, I don't think it's corruption. If the company has enough cash for extra perks, why the hell not.
Because they're trying to make a profit?Budgets aren't free money just because it's private enterprise.
Dude just straight up stole from the company and it's this kind of cope that both lets it happen and shows how hypocritical people are on the topic.
But, on the other hand, fuck the company, steal from them if you can. Just know that is theft from the stock owners and is therefore cool.
They straight up said it was all expenses paid so it's not stealing.
Nothing like the senior partner at this law firm I consulted at who got conned by his son into getting the a bleeding edge gaming rig for work "because he'd need it for multiple monitors and video calls" so said son could scavenge it from his dad in 3-5 when the business life cycle demanded a new computer. I did not make any friends (as someone with a vested interest in the firm's success, also the son is an entitled dick who's never had a job) with the son when I told the partner that a plato like he bought could last him a decade with proper maintenance.
What bout monitor + lappy or biblically accurate computers
When you have three monitors followed by two floating monitors above those on arms. A laptop on the side table neck to you. Your phone right below your keyboard and the tablet on top of the laptops keyboard.
You have reached peak screenage.
also smart watch
I have 3 monitors, what am I?
Same, I'm also a dev who prefers working off a notebook screen. This fact boggles the minds of my coworkers, especially my boss who seems mortally offended that I only work on one screen.
I guess that means I've broken the social norms of a corporate slave?
I feel it. I excitedly set up my side monitor in portrait mode for coding ages ago, but turns out I barely ever use it. Instead, I just use it for Discord or random youtube videos playing on the side while I do all my work on the main monitor...
There was a study years ago about American TV ownership. Size of television inversely correlates with income.
Well yeah rich people don't have to settle for sitting around the house all day. They have boats and racecars and planes to play with
It does if tech changes fast.
First, many rich people are older people.
Regardless of age, rich people bought expensive TVs when even the best ones were smaller. They still work great and have not been replaced.
Also, a TV is not as important to rich people. If they want to watch the game, they get tickets. The old screen is good enough. And a smaller screen probably fits nicer into their decor. In a poor household, the TV is the centrepiece and even if it is ugly, it looks better than the rest of the room.
Finally, rich people may be busier. I do not want this comment to be misunderstood but the reality is that television is just not as central to their lives.
Mostly though, I just think older TVs are smaller.
It's only about how important you're to shareholders. At 6 monitors, you'll become the ever important cyber security expert, who will get replaced by AI, except said AI will do a job so bad it'll sink the company.
And, at the top, they just talk to people, like a mafia don.
Nah, above him is the guy who doesn't even talk, just makes graffiti that puts the right messages directly into people's subconsciousness.
And at the very top there's a guy who returned to monke and only does primal grunts
The amount of screen size reflects the amount of work you do. So a smaller size has become a status signal. Showing you do not actually work.
You do meetings
The CEO also has the big screens. Their peons have two why would they only have one? What screens they're on the most is a different question.
What if you prefer both ends of the scale? I'll take as many monitors as HR will allow, but I will also kidnap a microsoft surface from the ewaste pile as it is so damn handy when you need to go to a location to fix things that dont have a spot to set a laptop.
This is so accurate, it hurts.
I can verify that this is correct.
*(Percieved) importance.
Wait.... What should I be then with my jelly star? Should i be running the world rather than being a dev?
I have one monitor but it's really wide. What did that make me?
6 monitors = it
because you always gotta have a game of halo going.
I don't have a phone. I just witness. I am posting this by sheer force of will. Someone hire me as you CEO.
Middle management screens are used by everyone.
All I've got is the tablet and the phone for work. Gosh either I'm an executive or not all workplaces and job types are alike.
1 moniter but still the last one importance in the list 🤣 🤣 🤣 speed stars
@programming.dev
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@programming.dev
Welcome to Programmer Humor!
This is a place where you can post jokes, memes, humor, etc. related to programming!
For sharing awful code theres also Programming Horror.
Rules
- Keep content in english
- No advertisements
- Posts must be related to programming or programmer topics
- If the mod doesn't find it funny, you're banned. Ha-ha!... For real: do not use the community for "statements". There are other places for such content. Keep it chill and funny.
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Importance, or lack of work contribution? Smaller screen = works less.
save