I don't even piss standing up anymore, but I'm still a firm believer in the concept of "it really isn't that hard to just look before you sit".

The lid always goes down when not in use at my house.

"It's a shit receptacle, not a water feature" has been repeated to anyone who doesn't know the rule.

I genuinely cannot understand why someone wouldn't want their seat and lid down at all times when not in use.

Flushing with the lid up is gross. I do not want to have poo particles flying around and landing on my toothbrush. But maybe that is just me... ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

Always keep the lid down to minimize poop spray!

Also keeps the fecal aerosol to a minimum.

Lid down is a win for everyone.

It could also be solved by everybody always putting the seat up ...

But it won't because everybody not agreeing on one course of action is the more fundamental problem.

You're basically just saying "This disagreement could be solved if everybody would agree".

Lid down gang. Stop leaving your toilet seats up.

Ive always put the lid down along with the seat. I believe its more sanitary and has the added benefit of women not falling fully in the bowl like when the seats up. Ive done this for about 15 years.

A few years after I started doing this, I was spending the night at my friend's house. I had to get up early to go to work, so I was first up. My friends mother got up next apparently. I was bombarded with texts and such, her mom was angry because she got up and went to the bathroom and just went for it after she sat down. Queue giant liquid waste mess to clean and an angry start to her day.

All these years later, I still think its one of the funniest things I've ever been part of in real life.

Just sit down to pee, losers.

Oh... I'm already doing that with my wife and in any case I'm always sitting down. I thought it was more commun to do that.

I mean I always thought it was more hygenic to prevent the "splash zone"...

"These invisible particles go on to coat and spread onto surfaces like floors and counters; or objects like hand towels, bathmats or even toothbrushes.
...
Toilets are scientifically proven to continue to produce contaminated toilet plumes over multiple successive flushes as indicated in the above video.
...
Toilet aerosols are known to contain Norovirus, SARS Coronavirus, Salmonella and many other Diseases." https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Toilet_plume

TLDR: always put the lid down before flushing.

Everybody saying keep the lid down for hygiene reason are missing the most important reason to keep the lid closed. Anything dropped or falling will inexorably end into the toilet if the lid is up.

I never understood the debate. Ensure it's how you need it before doing your thing. Applies equally to all individuals for any scenario. Not difficult.

"This debate would be solved if everyone would just agree to one choice."

Lid should go down unless you want all the poopy microparticles coming from your toilet when flushed.

I grew up with a dog. The toilet seat was always kept down to keep him away from drinking it, because we had toilet cleaning pucks in the tank that would have potentially poisoned him. Nothing to do with gender at all.

Also the mythbusters episode on toilet water splashing out onto bathroom surfaces scarred me as a child. We have a soft-close lid and I wait a few seconds for it to get to a low angle before I even flush.

The lid should be down before you flush.
Would you put your face 8cm above the bowl as you flush? No! Even with the lid down. Any dude who's ever pissed anywhere barefoot or in shorts knows the splash radius....

I’ve always been a lid fully closed person because of animals. The water here is bad enough that the toilet tank needs water treatment pucks, and those chemicals shouldn’t be consumed by pets.

It has been such a fucking struggle with the men who visit or live with me. And it makes absolutely no sense other than just being lazy and inconsiderate.

Whenever I go to someone else’s place, I leave the lid the same way I found it, or if I can’t remember how I found it, fully closed is safest (hardly anyone gets upset by that). That’s the polite thing to do. But that’s apparently just too much for lots of dudes. They come into the home of a woman who lives alone and leave the bathroom the way they want it with zero regard for who actually lives there.

They get one talking to about it, then I start slamming the lid down behind them every time they use it, very passive aggressively. These are all adults, they shouldn’t need more than one request to put the seat back how they found it. It doesn’t take them super long to figure it out, but WAY LONGER THAN IT SHOULD! If they can’t figure it out within a couple days/visits, they don’t get to be there anymore. I can’t afford emergency vet appointments for something that shouldn’t even be a problem.

I had one ex, in his 30s, mind, who was so inconsiderate about it for such a long time that I drew Reddit up and downvotes on the tank and lid (he was always on Reddit, so downvote on the lid, upvote on the tank), to indicate displeasure with the lid being left up. That worked, believe it or not.. in a really disgustingly childish sort of way. Depressing to have to resort to such nonsense just for a safe environment for everyone who actually lives there (he did not, just extended visits).. that dude is also why I have no patience for this shit anymore, and simply disallow people who can’t respect my home. I shouldn’t have to do that.

Any couple that fights over the toilet seat (or toothpaste or whatever other stupid thing) is doomed - get out now before it gets worse.

My wife of almost 30 years can have whatever she wants and I’m happy to provide it - especially if it’s something as stupid as the toilet seat. I spoil her, she spoils me. We’re happy.

It drives me crazy that I, a man, always shut it, but my wife won't. Our cat was drinking from it a couple days ago and that still isn't enough to make her change.

I literally don’t give a shit about the seat up or down, but close the lid ffs. Stop spray germs all over my toothbrush.

Also, I don’t care what direction the toilet paper goes. I don’t even look at it when I put a new roll in. I’m a free spirit.

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Why is this a debate? I'm always confused by this one and how everybody assumes it's a huge argument. Why are people annoyed at either? I don't even register what state the toilet seat is at when I arrive. I'll just adjust it based on whatever it is I need. What is the supposed annoyance at lowering (or raising) the seat? Is that not what you do before doing your business regardless? Don't you mostly leave the whole lid down anyway? Why is this such a cliche? I do not get it.

It is also the best option as it reduces bacterial spreading whipe flushing.

That's precisely how the debate between myself any my SO was finally ended. The seat stays down now unless in use.

I don’t get the leaving the seat up as a male. When I flush I don’t want pee and poop particles sprayed all over the room. That’s why I use a toilet in the first place

I have convinced a few people in my life to close the lid by telling them. Stand completely naked by an open toilet then flush it and just feel all that water splash for that time. Repeat again with closed lid if need be. Most the water you don't see but can feel it land on you. Now just think about all the stuff it lands on and you touch in your bathroom like your toothbrush.

The one thing that really bothers me is when I see people walk up to a urinal and flush it and just stand there letting all the stuff get all over themselves from the last guy. Also on the same note people who fake washing their hands then particularly don't dry them. Like WTF all you are doing is making little pools of bacteria to have a spa day. Then you leave those little pools on every thing you touch. I rather you not fucking wash your hands at all. And yes people notice you acting like a 5 year old who doesn't want to wash his hands because mommy told him to. Your a 35 year old grown ass man Jerry. Wash your hands for real. WTF.

BTW I'm a guy if you haven't guessed and I thank you for reading about my thoughts as I fall asleep.

Yeah, I don't want splash water getting anywhere else than the bowl. Also, what if I accidentally fumble something and drop it in the water. Even if there weren't a lid, I'd put the seat down in case of a level 10 emergency

I dunno why people care what position the seat & lid are in. It takes like 1 second to put it into the required configuration.

This is not a gender thing.

I e been doing it since I was 8. "Courtesy,"Google it.

I always close the lid when I’m not using my toilet. So do my wife and kid. It’s weird that people leave theirs open.

If you take the toilet seat up or down debate seriously I can only assume you're a tulpa conjured from the brain of a hack boomer comedian

Assuming 50% of people in the world have a penis (it’s lower but for the sake of argument we’ll say 50%), more than 50% of bathroom visits require sitting. People with vulvas need to sit, but so does anyone who is pooping, as well as anyone who has one of a number of conditions that makes standing during a bathroom visit untenable. Therefore, the seat should always be put down.

Who doesn’t do this?

I did this since childhood out of spite. Child me was frustrated that I always had to put it down for my sister and she never had to move the toilet seat anywhere. It made no sense. So instead of putting just the seat down I put the whole thing, lid and all, down so that she had to move the toilet lid every time she used it too.

This spite play became a habit that I now do always everywhere

Definitely put the lid down before flushing. No need so splash the sharticles all over the toilet

At home I leave it down, of I'm at a dive bar or something I leave the seat up so the next guy won't piss all over the seat. That benefits everyone.

For 15 years I lived in an apartment with the bathroom shelves directly above the toilet. It's a corollary of Murphy's Law that anything dropped in the bathroom somehow will land in the toilet bowl. Hence, the lid stays closed.

It could also be solved by everybody putting the seat and lid up. This will be an eternal debate.

Leaving it as-is after use is the most efficient (least number of seat movements)

I'm a man living alone, with a cat. The seat has been down for 10 years.

the real solution is to always leave it up

• Lid closed when flushing prevents contamination particles spraying everywhere
• Most toilet visits require the seat down anyway

Easy choice

Do your business on the floor next to the toilet, problem solved. No more flipping seats.

Have the ceramic only, no seats, and the problem's solved!

It could also be resolved by everybody agreeing to be responsible for the toilet when they go to use it.

Don't get me wrong. When I have female company, I do my best to leave the seat down.

I've only ever been chided on the issue once or twice in my life.

In my opinion it's on you to make sure the bathroom is ready for you when you go to use it.

It could also be solved by everyone putting the seat where they want it to be.

That's what I do. It's gross to keep it up in any orientation of up.

Lol I did this at my first job thinking that was only fair and then I overheard the female boss go into another coworkers office to ask her if she put the toilet seat all the way down. Apparently men are the only gender who should ever be touching a toilet seat at all.

Having dogs solved the problem in my house

In other words: just pee and crap sitting down

The real solution is to tape it shut with enough duct tape to restrain an African bull elephant. You're welcome.

The toilet is more tidy when everything is down.

The whole debate could be solved by lengthening toilets and everyone sitting. No more seat to lift.

I think it is solved by having a urinal be standard in a home bathroom. People like having a shower and a separate tub. Same.

It can be solved if we acknowledge the wet spots in front of public urinals. Too many men can't aim and should sit anyway.

Next best thing is to leave the seat as it was when you used it. This way the next person needs to change it only if they need it.

Having said that, in my household we close lid altogether, but sometimes female guests leave the lid up, with the seat down 🙄

You don’t all just choose the lid when done? That’s like opening a cupboard in the kitchen to get something then just leaving the cupboard open isn’t it?

Besides, with the lid closed it’s harder to accidentally drop something in there.

This debate always makes me think of Toni's reaction to "closing the toilet lid when you flush."

I didn't know that people left the lid up. Feels a bit like not closing the door of a fridge after you're done.

It could also be solved by everyone putting the seat and lid up, what's your point?

We have a toddler in the house. We keep the lid down because it gives us a few extra seconds in case he slips past us into the restroom and wants to splash around.

Use a bidet.

That's what I do. If you get a soft close seat & lid all it requires is a tiny tap on the lid.

That's what we do in our house, I decided it was the easiest way to be sure my son actually lifts the seat. If he has to lift the lid, he'll just lift the seat at the same time.

In this house we do lid up and seat down.

Every family member is asked to sit down.

Both decisions are purely convenience driven:

lid up -> you can just sit down without having to touch or adjust anything. After you're done, you just get up without touching anything (except to flush).

seat down -> I'm unwilling to deal with the mess created by people (myself included) that inevitably happens when peeing standing up. So everybody sitting is the way to go.

Where this fails is guests that are unfamiliar with how we do it. It also doesn't take splashes from flushing into consideration. But in all my years of using the facilities, I have not noticed a significant amount of dirt around the toilet that I would consider problematic.

I started doing this after my roommate got upset with me because she blindly sat down and fell in. Then she got upset because she interpreted putting the lid down as passive aggressive.

I prefer up:

1. I get to see if the water is actually leaving and stops flowing when it's supposed to, which often happens not to be the case
2. It's easier to put it up than down for me

No. 2 might not make much sense, but I don't like touching the seat. It's far easier to put it up with the side of my sole than do the opposite.

The true solution is to have a device you hook up to that extracts the pee and poop from your body, wipes you down, and sends you on your way. There will be no lid, no seat, just one hole in the wall you hook up to.

It's 2026. This discussion is no longer gendered, though it is still somewhat equipment dependent.

it's the default solution in my house because of the cats

If you leave the seat down how do you poop in the hole?

Diapers

In my 20s, I worked in a place primarily staffed by women. As in it was just me and one other guy on the floor and we didn't work the same shift. I intentionally left the seat up, waiting for a day to get spoken to about it. Somehow in my young mind, I thought I might be able to sue for discrimination. Yeah, I was kinda dumb. Nobody ever spoke to me, so I never had the opportunity to test that.

Currently, I try to put the seat down when I'm done, even though it's one sitter and three standers in my home. My thought is that it doesn't inconvenience me to put it down, so I do it.

This is what do in my home for a long time and my wife can’t complain.

It could also be solved in any other way.

Everybody puting the toilet upside down. Everybody going outside and not having a debate anymore. Everybody outing the seat up. Everybody getting a seatles toilet.

The "everybody agreeing one one solution" is the thing that ends the debate and not what the solution is.

I'M ALWAYS SAYING THIS!!

Personally, I think this is one of those "Man vs Bear" type arguments where it's not an argument about the actual thing, but an argument about gender power dynamics instead. Who is entitled to the default toilet setting? Etc, etc.

Could be solved that way, I personally don't participate in it.

Back during covid, I ordered and installed a fancy bidet that automatically lifts the lid when you walk in the bathroom, (you need to push a button to lift the ring but it automatically closes), and then automatically closes when you leave. It also has a heated seat and heated water and air dryer. So now she doesn't get made that I make her lift the seat lid anymore.

Worth every penny.......

not if you live with a guy who piss standing and all over the seat

Or leaving it up.

I had 2 older sisters. I was trained to put the toilet seat down.

I also grew up with a toilet with an overhang counter, so items were prone to fall in.

Do you think there's actually such a debate?

I (cis man) always fully close the toilet when it's not in use. Never would occur to me to do otherwise.

Some of my women friends leave the seat down lid open, but then their cats drink out of the toilet.

Or you could make sure it always goes up.

the washlet on our main toilet looks aesthetically better with the lid down, so it's always down even though we're a house of two cis men

tho heated seat incentivizes sitting to pee anyways

I'm a bachelor. I live alone. My toilet gets configured exactly as I say it does.

When not in use or being cleaned, the seat and lid are closed. Because I'd expect Izzy to fall into the toilet then go scampering around getting toilet water on literally everything, only to go to the litter box, get shit grit stuck to her wet fur and track THAT all over the house...

Cat proof toilet: close lid. That is an order.

I ALWAYS SAY THIS.

The better option is a fancy japanese toilet that opens and closes itself as you enter and leave the room.

So where does the excrement go, on the lid?

I believe in the majority rule.

Got more standing pissers than sitting pissers? Seat stays up.

Got more sitting pissers than standing pissers? Seat stays down.

I know I'm a weirdo but I pee like 7x a night and I need the seat down cover up.

Just put it back as you found it. Easy peesy.

This was my position when my husband and I moved in together, but I could not convince him.

Then we got a kitten who loved to drink from the faucet. After the second time she fell into the open toilet on her way to the bathroom sink, he got on board with keeping the toilet closed.

19 years later, we no longer have that sweet baby, but it's still a habit.

I always put the lid down out of habit. But you end up cleaning the toilet more from mold build up in the bowl.

stop crying about nonsense.
seat goes up.

My woman doesnt care, she has her own bathroom :)

My toilet is always wide open.

Seat up - ready and clean 99% of the time

Seat down - pissed on 99% of the time

You pick.. no kink shaming.

E: in public... At home we're civilized*

How about no toilets? How about no cities?

Men aren't the ones complaining about seat position.

Anyone who cares this much about toilet seats isn't worth associating with

That's the point.

You just can't admit that women are right.